Dating in South East Asia, Korea and China

[Guile]

Yes I have.  I've been to Asia five times and to South Korea once.

Did you date any Asian women then?  I'm Asian and I had a hard time dating Koreans due to the language barrier and cultural differences.  Much harder than Russians. 

Why on earth would you want a girl from NKorea...

[Omega1982]

Yes I have.  I've been to Asia five times and to South Korea once.

Did you date any Asian women then?  I'm Asian and I had a hard time dating Koreans due to the language barrier and cultural differences.  Much harder than Russians. 

Why on earth would you want a girl from NKorea...

In South Korea I met with a Russian woman from Vladivostok and we traveled together. 

[Omega1982]

Yes I have.  I've been to Asia five times and to South Korea once.

Did you date any Asian women then?  I'm Asian and I had a hard time dating Koreans due to the language barrier and cultural differences.  Much harder than Russians. 

Why on earth would you want a girl from NKorea...

I'm not searching for a N Korean.  I understand its not possible at the moment.  I'm just saying that if the country is in fact in the same position China was 40 years ago that it might be a bride market in the future as China is now. 

Im currently looking in other parts of the world. 

But for me, as for most of us here, it would be somewhere Christian, non black, slim and poorer than the US. 

[Guile]

Yes I have.  I've been to Asia five times and to South Korea once.

Did you date any Asian women then?  I'm Asian and I had a hard time dating Koreans due to the language barrier and cultural differences.  Much harder than Russians. 

In South Korea I met with a Russian woman from Vladivostok and we traveled together.

But did you date any Koreans? You asked about North Korea so I thought you were interested.

[Guile]

Yes I have.  I've been to Asia five times and to South Korea once.

Did you date any Asian women then?  I'm Asian and I had a hard time dating Koreans due to the language barrier and cultural differences.  Much harder than Russians. 

Why on earth would you want a girl from NKorea...

I'm not searching for a N Korean.  I understand its not possible at the moment.  I'm just saying that if the country is in fact in the same position China was 40 years ago that it might be a bride market in the future as China is now. 

Im currently looking in other parts of the world. 

But for me, as for most of us here, it would be somewhere Christian, non black, slim and poorer than the US.

China is not a bride market...yes some Chinese will marry foreigners but usually those who are long time expats in China.  I myself wouldn't even date a mainlander and I speak the language!  the overseas Chinese in USA, Canada, UK will marry white people but they are 2nd generation and think like a westerner.

China is not a Christian country, they are still dealing with the effects of communism.  Why poorer than the US?

[msmoby]

Omega....

are you thinking 'saving' a lass will make her grateful and loyal?

[Steveboy]

Omega....

are you thinking 'saving' a lass will make her grateful and loyal?

are you thinking 'saving' a lass will make her grateful and loyal?

It is best not to even let this idea come into your head.. will always land up with tears and heartbreak..

[andrewfi]

It's a self esteem thing. If you don't think you have value as a person then you try to offer value in some other way.
Passport, saviour, money.
But all are valueless unless one has value as a person. Our value as a person is, in the end, what we decide it is.

[Manny]

China is not a bride market...yes some Chinese will marry foreigners but usually those who are long time expats in China. 

I disagree. One need not be a resident laowai or gwailo to marry a Chinese girl. The mail order bride market is well and truly open in China.

That said, the wisdom of marrying a regular mainland girl (who hasn't travelled much) might be open to question as you suggest in a recent post. From what I know, I agree that might be an uphill struggle. A bloke might fare better with an ABC, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Macau or even a South Korean (if he can make sense of her) or Japanese. Thai, Filipino and Cambodian women are more popular in Europe. The Finns and Dutch seem obsessed by them.

[Omega1982]

China is not a bride market...yes some Chinese will marry foreigners but usually those who are long time expats in China. 

I disagree. One need not be a resident laowai or gwailo to marry a Chinese girl. The mail order bride market is well and truly open in China.

That said, the wisdom of marrying a regular mainland girl (who hasn't travelled much) might be open to question as you suggest in a recent post. From what I know, I agree that might be an uphill struggle. A bloke might fare better with an ABC, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Macau or even a South Korean (if he can make sense of her) or Japanese. Thai, Filipino and Cambodian women are more popular in Europe. The Finns and Dutch seem obsessed by them.

The Japanese and South Korean woman will have a good economy and career and therefore you won't find a 20 year age difference, nor the supermodel. 

[Guile]

I disagree. One need not be a resident laowai or gwailo to marry a Chinese girl. The mail order bride market is well and truly open in China.

That said, the wisdom of marrying a regular mainland girl (who hasn't travelled much) might be open to question as you suggest in a recent post. From what I know, I agree that might be an uphill struggle. A bloke might fare better with an ABC, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Macau or even a South Korean (if he can make sense of her) or Japanese. Thai, Filipino and Cambodian women are more popular in Europe. The Finns and Dutch seem obsessed by them.

Well that link is an affiliate dating site with your forum so I don't know how much credence to put into it.  My suburb is about 50% Chinese and I don't know a single marriage from someone who went to China to find a wife.  Most Chinese will marry within their culture...even if it someone from HK to China or Taiwan. 

The ones who can afford to immigrate are rich so don't need a "sponsor".  Many Chinese from small towns migrate towards the big cities, Beijing, Shanghai, Shenzhen etc...looking for work and love.

Thai, Filipinos are Asian also but a whole other culture and expats do seem to flock to those countries too.

[Guile]

First thing is ask yourself if you are even interested in that culture?  If you want to date a Chinese are you willing to learn the language.  It's the same as with Russian women.
Or are you just flashing your money and perceived wealth being from a western country and the perks of that.

[Manny]

Well that link is an affiliate dating site with your forum so I don't know how much credence to put into it.

I doubt they would be running tours there if the market was imaginary.

You'll know about China's leftover women (sheng nu) I expect? Those are the ones marrying foreigners. Here is one article of many written on the subject.

[Guile]

yeah I know about China's "leftover women" but it's more complicated than that.  That article you linked talks nothing of them marrying foreigners.

This is a better article explaining things: https://www.scmp.com/magazines/post-magazine/article/1495043/good-man-hard-find-chinas-leftover-women-look-love-abroad

It states official numbers for interracial marriage are about 50,000 in 2012.  Still a drop in the bucket for a country with 1.5 billion.

Many of those women end up going to Britain, USA, etc...  There is still a huge cultural gap between Asians and whites. 

[andrewfi]

In absolute numbers 50,000 is a very large number. It certainly exceeds the size of the Eastern European MOB market at pretty much any time and that, smaller, market supported many large, successful, businesses until the supply of women dropped off.

Of course, in terms of the overall populations, the numbers of women were tiny, but that's not the important number in this context.

[msmoby]

Andrewfi - as ever - is probably incorrect ..

1/ Continued use of the term MoB -  his first mistake,, 

2/ I'm guessing the Russian / Ukrainian market has matured .. the ladies advertise themselves - no need for agencies and if guys feel the need to line the pockets of Adate and the pay by letter model sites - then more fool them

3/ Hands up who has 'ordered' a bride ?


The very use of the term is demeaning to one's partner

[andrewfi]

Moby, do some learning and be honest.

1) You might not like the term but it is the generally accepted term for the process under discussion.
2) Yes, the Eastern European mail order bride has pretty much died out, that's well known, you might know somebody who wrote extensively about that process and the way the business would turn out. The numbers of women who ever took part in Eastern Europe are tiny and have not increased. The route to the market has changed.
3) Nobody 'orders' a bride, see point one.

[redroo]

The "ordering" part is interesting, as I understand that in Thailand and the Philippines you must PAY the family a "bride price" or "Dowry" if you want to marry a daughter.
Is this the same in China, or other Asian countries, does anyone know?

[Chris]

The "ordering" part is interesting, as I understand that in Thailand and the Philippines you must PAY the family a "bride price" or "Dowry" if you want to marry a daughter.
Is this the same in China, or other Asian countries, does anyone know?

A Dowry is a different thing entirely to a Bride price. A Dowry is an amount of property or money brought by a bride to her husband on their marriage.

A Bride price is money, property, or other form of wealth paid by a groom or his family to the family of the woman he will be married to or is just about to marry.

Many African countries have a Bride price and I think China still does too.

[redroo]

Thanks for pointing out the difference Chris, so yes I meant bride price where the man pays

[Omega1982]

According to Manny China is the next Ukraine when it comes to brides. 

Yet, they have significantly more men than women and also their average household income has quadrupled in the past ten years. 

So what would motivate a Chinese woman to seek a western husband and come to the US/EU? 

[Manny]

So what would motivate a Chinese woman to seek a western husband and come to the US/EU?

Many Chinese guys are quite dorky, into computer games, and providing is a thing there. If he can't provide, he is toast before he starts. If her folks are poor, you'll be providing for them too if you marry her. Women want reasonably affluent guys like women do anywhere.

Chinese blokes are not known for their chivalry or good treatment of women either. The dorky ones are often uncomfortable and uneasy around women. Affluent and confident ones often like the ladies a little too much so mistresses and three day nights out are very common.

Dark or tanned skin is unfashionable in China and its near abroad (I'll explain why if anyone doesn't know). Thus, whiter skin and paler babies are a thing. Blue eyes and/or fair hair are a novelty for them too.

Once women pass 30, or if divorced, their desirability locally goes through the floor. Youth and [the appearance of] chastity is prized, and 'old girls' (over 30) less so. Its changing a bit now though, I know a few 'old girls' that found husbands the last couple of years but the 30-45 market are the ones marrying laowai.

If her parents are financially comfortable, and/or she has brothers and sisters (which is only likely if they are financially comfortable and bought out of the one child policy), you will be spared financial support and she more likely to be able to relocate without family duty or the onerous bits of filial piety holding her back.

The foregoing only applies if she speaks English, really. Communication is a must as we know. Those with no English will be so far apart from western culture I'd doubt success is likely.

The numbers are not huge as a percentage of people as noted upthread (language being a big reason I'd say), that there are 1.3 billion people makes the percentages tiny. But the numbers are plenty large enough for it to be a viable dating market.

Walk through any Scandinavian airport terminal and you will see its a very vibrant market in that part of the world.