Russian, Ukrainian & FSU Information & Discussion Forums

Dating & Marriage With Women From Russia, Ukraine, Belarus & FSU => Dating in the FSU and Other Countries => Topic started by: americanista on August 29, 2009, 07:11:33 AM

Title: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: americanista on August 29, 2009, 07:11:33 AM
Hello guys, I would like to know if a sincere and serious about marriage woman age 18 or 19 would be interested and serious about getting married to a 37 year old man. I say this because i'm a fair looking guy in fit, trim, always excersising and in healthy shape with an average life style. What do you guys think, is it possible for her and I to make a good match? Plus I  get winks or replies from women in this 18/19/20 age group besides the other age groups. Is it possible.  Thanks.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Link on August 29, 2009, 07:26:21 AM
             :sick0002:  .............................................  :sick0002:

 :sick0012: And myself at  only 24 yo. when I went to Russia, I thought I was a little old for a 19 yo. :sick0012:


 :rolleye0009: :sick0012: :sick0002: :fighting0004: :rolleye0009: :sick0012: :sick0002: :fighting0004:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Eduard on August 29, 2009, 07:27:32 AM
believe it or not, 50 year old guys also get messages from many 20 year old beauties of model quality looks! As long as you keep feeding the "pay per email" scams and preferring to live in a fantasy land this will go on.
If you are 37 y.o. and a good looking in shape guy I would recommend to search for 24y.o. and up. That's a lot more realistic.
And get off the site where 18 and 19 year old girls are hitting on you. It's most likely a scam.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: mendeleyev on August 29, 2009, 07:40:38 AM
I agree with Ed and Link. As the father of a 19 year old Russian girl who lives in Russia, the girls at this age are not yet ready to make such a commitment for leaving their country, language and culture to marry a man from another country.

You are asking for heartache and trouble.

BTW, it has nothing to do with how trim you are today or how fit you feel. What you will feel someday with an unrealistic age spread is the joy of divorce when you are at retirement age and she is hot and being chased by young guys who continually remind her that her husband is an old fart on the downhill side of life.

Someday she will realize how "fit and trim" you are as she changes your depends diapers while she is still in her sexual prime. Snagging a hottie today is more than just about today. It is also about keeping her tomorrow.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Manny on August 29, 2009, 07:49:03 AM
Hello guys, I would like to know if a sincere and serious about marriage woman age 18 or 19 would be interested and serious about getting married to a 37 year old man.

No.

Confine your search to the 25+ age group.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: jb on August 29, 2009, 07:50:03 AM
This is another train wreck looking for a place to happen.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Link on August 29, 2009, 08:01:04 AM
P.S.  "Americanista" in Spanish refers soccer fans of "El America" a soccer team of the Mexican league


Club América is a Mexican football club based in Mexico City, competing in the Primera División. América is owned by Emilio Azcárraga, who owns Televisa, making it the richest club in Mexico, and the richest outside Europe. América and rivals Chivas share the distinction of being the two most successful teams in the Mexican first division - América has ten championships, behind Chivas with eleve



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Club_América


I could be wrong but my guess is that this guy is from Spanish heritage, just a soccer fan or none.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: nunya on August 29, 2009, 09:45:16 AM
18, 19, 20, 21 year old Russian girls are thinking about 19, 20, 21, 22 year old Russian boys.    18, 19, 20 year old Russian/Ukraine girls are NOT thinking about 40 year old foreign men,  unless their is some funny business going on.

23 is the age of maturity, of course in my opinion only. Give these young ladies one year out of the university and you will find many sincere young women who will seriously consider a foreign man up to about 12 years her senior.  However if a man is handsome, in good shape and well to do, many of these young ladies will consider a man of up to 15 years older than her.

Relationships of 20 years age difference or more are the exception, NOT the norm and yes most men think they are the exception. Most are not.



ps. Link, what does the above have to do with 18, 19, 20 year old Ukraine/Russian girls?  :offtopic:

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Noname on August 29, 2009, 10:18:19 AM
I ignore any of them under 30 years old (I am 42). The good thing about the FSU is most women have still got their figures when they are in their thirties unlike western women. Why do you want such a young girl ? Do you not get bored of them ?
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: alenika on August 29, 2009, 10:34:58 AM
Hello guys, I would like to know if a sincere and serious about marriage woman age 18 or 19 would be interested and serious about getting married to a 37 year old man.
I think you should put question as : "is 18-19 y.o. girl too young for me?" not as "do 18-19 y.o. girls consider me too old?" and the direction will be clear.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: fireeater on August 29, 2009, 10:38:17 AM
When I get one (and no matter what site you use you will get some). I always ask why they think such an age gap would work. Seems most hate that reply, and you never hear from them again.  ;D

If that fails, addressing then them as "daughter", also seems to discourage them.   :laugh:

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: hemingway on August 29, 2009, 11:04:08 AM
Hello guys, I would like to know if a sincere and serious about marriage woman age 18 or 19 would be interested and serious about getting married to a 37 year old man.
I think you should put question as : "is 18-19 y.o. girl too young for me?" not as "do 18-19 y.o. girls consider me too old?" and the direction will be clear.
Yes. That is the real question here.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: TwoBitBandit on August 29, 2009, 11:13:36 AM
Hello guys, I would like to know if a sincere and serious about marriage woman age 18 or 19 would be interested and serious about getting married to a 37 year old man. I say this because i'm a fair looking guy in fit, trim, always excersising and in healthy shape with an average life style. What do you guys think, is it possible for her and I to make a good match? Plus I  get winks or replies from women in this 18/19/20 age group besides the other age groups. Is it possible.  Thanks.

I'm the exact same age as you, yet I wouldn't take a second look at a girl in this age group.

IMHO, the absolute minimum age a guy should consider is about 23 or 24 even if the guy himself is young.  At this point at least some fraction of women will be mature enough to consider marriage.  On my last trip I dated girls from 24-29.

Earlier on in my search I dated younger girls.  I just found that they were never serious.  The road to getting a wife this way is a long one, and young girls just don't have the mental fortitude to see it through.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Link on August 29, 2009, 11:29:35 AM



ps. Link, what does the above have to do with 18, 19, 20 year old Ukraine/Russian girls?  :offtopic:




Yes, I agree the post above is off topic, however if this guy is a Chicano that could explain why such an old man is looking for fresh young teens. You are based in Texas you should know the Chicano mentality and customs better than me.  In some of the rural towns from which they parents (or themselves) came from, (although its illegal by current Mexican laws) some of them consider the actual age of 15 as mature enough to breed with.

Fifteen-year-old girls have a ceremony called a Quinceañera which announces their availability to become wives, mothers and girlfriends.
"In the pueblo where I grew up girls are usually married by 13 years old....I was unaware of the nature of the offense or that it was a bad crime", said Lopez through the translator. [Illegal Immigrant Pleads Guilty To Sexual Assault, WTOV9 2/28/06]

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: BCKev on August 29, 2009, 12:09:03 PM

 In some of the rural towns from which they parents (or themselves) came from, (although is illegal by current Mexican laws) some of them consider the actual age of 15 as mature enough to breed with.


Absolutely agree with you on this Link. A couple of years ago I met a married couple with their month old baby in a small city in Chiapas. She was 15, and her husband was 53.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Link on August 29, 2009, 12:16:31 PM

 In some of the rural towns from which they parents (or themselves) came from, (although is illegal by current Mexican laws) some of them consider the actual age of 15 as mature enough to breed with.


Absolutely agree with you on this Link. A couple of years ago I met a married couple with their month old baby in a small city in Chiapas. She was 15, and her husband was 53.

I was shocked when in Guerrero I met a couple the girl was only 12 and the boy was 15.   ???
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: kievstar on August 29, 2009, 12:18:04 PM
Marrying a women under 20 years old is a gamble as their going to change a lot by the time their in their mid 30's.  Will you change with them.  If not, your going to be mid 50's paying child and ex wife support.   Based on your age focus on girls within 10-12 years.  
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: BCKev on August 29, 2009, 12:19:36 PM
I would like to know if a sincere and serious about marriage woman age 18 or 19 would be interested and serious about getting married to a 37 year old man.

Generally speaking, I agree with what the others have said so far. Consider this: An 18 year old girl may think of herself as being serious, but at that age, how reliable would her judgement be? You are much better off looking for girls that have had a few more years to mature.

When I was 47 visiting Ukraine there were a couple of 23 year olds chasing after me. Even more of an age difference, and just as crazy in my opinion. Maybe they were up to no good? I honestly can't say, I turned them down and stuck with women closer to my age.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: kievstar on August 29, 2009, 12:20:54 PM
In poor countries and poor areas you will find very young women marrying.  This happens not only in Mexico.  Financial security is more important than love sometimes.  
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Manny on August 29, 2009, 01:18:16 PM
18, 19, 20, 21 year old Russian girls are thinking about 19, 20, 21, 22 year old Russian boys.    18, 19, 20 year old Russian/Ukraine girls are NOT thinking about 40 year old foreign men,  unless their is some funny business going on.

Relationships of 20 years age difference or more are the exception, NOT the norm and yes most men think they are the exception. Most are not.

This is going to be a highly Googled and much searched topic.

For the benefit of our many reading guests, Nunya has been doing this stuff for many years. He knows his eggs. He is entirely correct here in my opinion. Many other contributors on this topic up to now have significant experience with former Soviet Union women; and they all seem to agree.

Many men enter this endeavour having landed at some semi-scam site or another and having convinced themselves that poor Russian/Ukrainian smokin' hot teenagers are gagging to meet middle aged Western men - and it is not the case any more. It has not been the case for many years. That ship has sailed!
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: 2tallbill on August 29, 2009, 03:28:39 PM
I would highly recommend avoiding a site where you were contacted
by 18, 19 year old girls. No real girl who wasn't being paid to write to you
would do so. You will also have ZERO in common with her. The stuff you
did when you were 19 years old she would have to read about in a history
book.

Remember when you were 18 and a girl was "mad at you" because  you
said hello to Becky Smithers and that you should remember that she hates
Becky Smithers ever since she wrote that comment in her year book in
7th grade?

18, 19, 20 year old girls even the cleverest, smartest and brightest are "not
finished yet" and they will radically change in the next few years. Russian girls
have the same basic molecules, brain development, etc as Western girls.

In some ways RW might be a little more mature yet in other ways AW appear
more mature. A 20 year old AW is more likely to have her own apartment, car,
credit card etc. A 20 year old RW is more likely to speak a foreign language, be
graduated from a University etc.

There are a zillion RW who are older and look just as hot.

Just my two kopecks,

Bill

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: FSU explorer on August 29, 2009, 07:28:05 PM
And now the dissenting opinion,

I think a 35 year old guy could possibly date and marry a mature 20 year old girl.  However, your risk-tolerance has to be higher.  As with anything in life you have to weight the rewards and the risks in a dispassionate manner and proceed from there.  There are cases, in which you are not specifically looking for a young 20 year old, but suddenly she appears and turns out to be the best choice.  Should you turn her away just because of her age, even if everything else is fine. 

Having said that, I will also add that I do agree that a 35 year old should not be looking for 20 year old girls, but if one appears and things are great, why not give it a try? I think the greater danger lies in actively seeking within this age group.  Nonetheless, you should proceed being fully aware of the higher risk inherent in such  relationships.  Just because there is a 15 year difference does not make it an automatic subprime relationship.

Caveat emptor, pal
 
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Wild Orchid on August 29, 2009, 08:08:33 PM
why would 37 yo be attracted to 18 yo in the first place? :sick0012: They are kids at this age, real kids.

My Uni mate married 28 yo when she was 20, and it was huge topic for our gossips, we thought he was SOOOOO OLD! Later my friend started dating a 34 yo Uni teacher, she was 21. I was shocked as well, and was telling her to come to her senses, he was ancient, couple months later I met my ex, he was 34 too. When I at the age of 16 was chased by 36 yo neighbor  I was totally grossed out. 

They might send winks to you, but what do they really want?

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Eduard on August 29, 2009, 08:47:51 PM
why would 37 yo be attracted to 18 yo in the first place? :sick0012: They are kids at this age, real kids.

My Uni mate married 28 yo when she was 20, and it was huge topic for our gossips, we thought he was SOOOOO OLD! Later my friend started dating a 34 yo Uni teacher, she was 21. I was shocked as well, and was telling her to come to her senses, he was ancient, couple months later I met my ex, he was 34 too. When I at the age of 16 was chased by 36 yo neighbor  I was totally grossed out. 

They might send winks to you, but what do they really want?


they are getting paid 50% of everything he spends on them.  He spends $10 on an email, she gets $5, he spends a $100 to send flowers, she gets $50. He spends $15 per hour on a translator, she gets $7 per hour for the time translator is engaged. It's a job! ::)

One of the names for this in Ukraine is "anti-crisis measures". Before the crisis it was called plain "scam"  :chuckle:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Wild Orchid on August 29, 2009, 11:25:30 PM
why would 37 yo be attracted to 18 yo in the first place? :sick0012: They are kids at this age, real kids.



they are getting paid 50% of everything he spends on them.  He spends $10 on an email, she gets $5, he spends a $100 to send flowers, she gets $50. He spends $15 per hour on a translator, she gets $7 per hour for the time translator is engaged. It's a job! ::)

One of the names for this in Ukraine is "anti-crisis measures". Before the crisis it was called plain "scam"  :chuckle:
Obviously they send their winks not because they like hims so much, it is not so hard to figure out, but my question was about men not the girls

 Once I was walking the street and saw some new Russian (it was long time ago) in his late 30-s chatting up very young and very attractive girl on her way from school to home, she was in school uniform and with school bag.  She was very flattered but I guess she didn't know much about pedophilia back then. 
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: fireeater on August 30, 2009, 06:49:46 AM
why would 37 yo be attracted to 18 yo in the first place? :sick0012: They are kids at this age, real kids.



they are getting paid 50% of everything he spends on them.  He spends $10 on an email, she gets $5, he spends a $100 to send flowers, she gets $50. He spends $15 per hour on a translator, she gets $7 per hour for the time translator is engaged. It's a job! ::)

One of the names for this in Ukraine is "anti-crisis measures". Before the crisis it was called plain "scam"  :chuckle:
Obviously they send their winks not because they like hims so much, it is not so hard to figure out, but my question was about men not the girls

 Once I was walking the street and saw some new Russian (it was long time ago) in his late 30-s chatting up very young and very attractive girl on her way from school to home, she was in school uniform and with school bag.  She was very flattered but I guess she didn't know much about pedophilia back then. 

For the men it strokes their ego, thinking some hot young thing is after them. (They stop thinking with one brain and use the other   :-X) Add in that myth of age differences not meaning much to FSU women, and you have all those ingredients to lure them into it.  (some of those sites actually state this)    :chuckle :Reality then turns into fantasy.  :nod:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: FSU explorer on August 30, 2009, 06:58:13 AM
why would 37 yo be attracted to 18 yo in the first place? :sick0012: They are kids at this age, real kids.



they are getting paid 50% of everything he spends on them.  He spends $10 on an email, she gets $5, he spends a $100 to send flowers, she gets $50. He spends $15 per hour on a translator, she gets $7 per hour for the time translator is engaged. It's a job! ::)

One of the names for this in Ukraine is "anti-crisis measures". Before the crisis it was called plain "scam"  :chuckle:
Obviously they send their winks not because they like hims so much, it is not so hard to figure out, but my question was about men not the girls

 Once I was walking the street and saw some new Russian (it was long time ago) in his late 30-s chatting up very young and very attractive girl on her way from school to home, she was in school uniform and with school bag.  She was very flattered but I guess she didn't know much about pedophilia back then. 


Well since I was the only person that offered a dissenting opinion I will try to answer your question.  Why would a 37 yo be attracted to an 18 yo?  Great sex, or so they think.  Probably the same for Cougars (older females seeking a much younger guy).

I would not fault any 37 yo guy for having sex with an 18 yo girl ( or 37 yo Lady with an 18 yo boy) since at that age everyone involved is a consenting adult, at least in the US. It is not illegal.  However, the issue here is marrying an 18, 19, or 20 yo.  It is possible and I am sure there are happy stories out there with young RWs and much older WMs, but as I posted earlier, if a guy decides to do this he should realize that he is taking a lot of risk on top of the cultural differences, and so on.  Once again, I would emphasize that marrying an 18, 19, or 20 yo is an extremely risky proposition not for the faint of heart.  Also, if you choose your wife based on looks and nothing else you have to realize that beauty is a depreciating asset, sometimes linearly, and in some instances at an accelerated pace.  Marrying an 18, 19, or 20 yo is like being a venture capitalist; yes you can make it big, but.........caveat emptor,  as I wrote before.

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: hemingway on August 30, 2009, 07:59:29 AM
why would 37 yo be attracted to 18 yo in the first place? :sick0012: They are kids at this age, real kids.



they are getting paid 50% of everything he spends on them.  He spends $10 on an email, she gets $5, he spends a $100 to send flowers, she gets $50. He spends $15 per hour on a translator, she gets $7 per hour for the time translator is engaged. It's a job! ::)

One of the names for this in Ukraine is "anti-crisis measures". Before the crisis it was called plain "scam"  :chuckle:
Obviously they send their winks not because they like hims so much, it is not so hard to figure out, but my question was about men not the girls

 Once I was walking the street and saw some new Russian (it was long time ago) in his late 30-s chatting up very young and very attractive girl on her way from school to home, she was in school uniform and with school bag.  She was very flattered but I guess she didn't know much about pedophilia back then. 


Well since I was the only person that offered a dissenting opinion I will try to answer your question.  Why would a 37 yo be attracted to an 18 yo?  Great sex, or so they think.  Probably the same for Cougars (older females seeking a much younger guy).

I would not fault any 37 yo guy for having sex with an 18 yo girl ( or 37 yo Lady with an 18 yo boy) since at that age everyone involved is a consenting adult, at least in the US. It is not illegal.  However, the issue here is marrying an 18, 19, or 20 yo.  It is possible and I am sure there are happy stories out there with young RWs and much older WMs, but as I posted earlier, if a guy decides to do this he should realize that he is taking a lot of risk on top of the cultural differences, and so on.  Once again, I would emphasize that marrying an 18, 19, or 20 yo is an extremely risky proposition not for the faint of heart.  Also, if you choose your wife based on looks and nothing else you have to realize that beauty is a depreciating asset, sometimes linearly, and in some instances at an accelerated pace.  Marrying an 18, 19, or 20 yo is like being a venture capitalist; yes you can make it big, but.........caveat emptor,  as I wrote before.



It is very interesting how the ladies seem unanimous on the abnormality of this scenario, but many of the guys keep trying to make it more of a business decision.  :rolleye0009: :sick0012:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: americanista on August 30, 2009, 08:02:04 AM
Hello again guys,  Thanks for all of  your advice.  The age group I'm focusing on is women ages 22-29 but like I said if women who are 18/19/20 are interested in getting to know me then I don't have a problem in getting to them better.  I am not only looking for women 18 or 19 I just think that If they want to get to know me i'm willing to chat with them and see what develops out of that. Like I said, 22 and up is what i'm looking at. I have just started my search and I have only put my profile on top agencies (gold and white list) not scam agencies or black list agencies. I have not spent that much money just a few dollars. Now i'm only testing out my profile to see what kind of response I get and I see I get letters, winks or some sort of response from women 18-32. Most of the time I don't answer the women back because I'm trying to decide which of the top recommended gold/white list sites I'm going to be a fulltime paying member. I don't consider myself an out-of-this-world good looking guy, just a fair looking guy with a fit shape because I have dedicated myself to a lifestyle of sport and exercise. I know looks come and go for both men and women that's why i'm also looking for the inner beauty besides the physical beauty these great women offer. In my profile I make sure to mention that the inner person is one of my top priorities. So right now i'm doing my homework and see what path I will choose. I still hope to hear from you guys.  Thanks again.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Eduard on August 30, 2009, 09:04:37 AM
The bottom line:
even the honest white list/gold list agencies will have scammers and scam organisations on them. So don't think that just because they are on the list it's all legit. Not!
Also take it from a guy with years of experience: if any girl under 25 contacts you first or "winks" at you you can pretty much bet that it's either a "pay per email" scam or a pro-dater or some one with an ulterior motive. Wanna get used? Keep going the way that you are going.
Age old wisdome: try to learn on other people's misstakes rather than on your own. This forum is good for that.
If you don't, no big deal, you'll just be a year or two older and a few grand shorter, still "single" but with your feet closer to the ground and your head out of the clouds hopefully.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: BCKev on August 30, 2009, 09:22:04 AM

 if any girl under 25 contacts you first or "winks" at you you can pretty much bet that it's either a "pay per email" scam or a pro-dater or some one with an ulterior motive. Wanna get used? Keep going the way that you are going.


This is the problem with some of the agencies: spamming you with "letters". How do you know if an email you were sent was actually sent by the woman in the profile? Or is a general introduction letter sent without her knowledge? All those spam emails can make you think you are very popular with the 18 year old girls! :chuckle:

I suggest you find out whether or not the agencies you have signed up with have a policy of spamming you. I am sure in some cases it will be obvious.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: RG on August 30, 2009, 10:24:22 AM
Hello again guys,  Thanks for all of  your advice.  The age group I'm focusing on is women ages 22-29 but like I said if women who are 18/19/20 are interested in getting to know me then I don't have a problem in getting to them better.  I am not only looking for women 18 or 19 I just think that If they want to get to know me i'm willing to chat with them and see what develops out of that. Like I said, 22 and up is what i'm looking at. I have just started my search and I have only put my profile on top agencies (gold and white list) not scam agencies or black list agencies. I have not spent that much money just a few dollars. Now i'm only testing out my profile to see what kind of response I get and I see I get letters, winks or some sort of response from women 18-32. Most of the time I don't answer the women back because I'm trying to decide which of the top recommended gold/white list sites I'm going to be a fulltime paying member. I don't consider myself an out-of-this-world good looking guy, just a fair looking guy with a fit shape because I have dedicated myself to a lifestyle of sport and exercise. I know looks come and go for both men and women that's why i'm also looking for the inner beauty besides the physical beauty these great women offer. In my profile I make sure to mention that the inner person is one of my top priorities. So right now i'm doing my homework and see what path I will choose. I still hope to hear from you guys.  Thanks again.

Wow.  I'm sorry, I mean no offense, and you are sincere..I simply do not realize there are so many that I think would ask this, about 18-20YO little girls.    
We are close in age, and I have dated a fair amount of 20-25YOs, as well as older.  I also have an *amazing* 20YO RW 'pen pal.'  
It is 'fun.'  It can be exciting.  Yet, there is no way I would even *touch* an 18 or 19YO girl, because in this case, that is *exactly* what they are - a girl, not a woman.  Even the mature ones, and there are some.

Think of this - when *you* were 18, are you the same person that you are today?  I doubt it.  I had to date *older* at that age for 'compatibility,' yet, I have changed since then as well.  I do not believe nearly *anyone* should marry before they are 25.  Why?  Most simply do not even know who *they* are yet, let alone what is important to them in a compatible partner.  Even those that do, will still go through some changes yet, or realize that they missed obvious things that are important to them.  

It is not *impossible*, but it is extremely unlikely to last, with someone so young.  Chances are, they have not yet even understood what real love (not lust, not 6 week long boyfriend/girlfriend) is, nor matured enough to know ups and downs are part of all relationships.  As they grow, it can be exciting to be around - University or further schooling, perhaps career - it is something many of us can still relate to in not so distant memories.  But what of others?  I used to *love* living in a city.  The energy, just all of it.  Now, I will never live inside the heart of a city again.  I will *visit*, and love it, but not live inside one.  I have learned more about myself as I have grown.  

That is a simple example, but one that is already big enough.  Perhaps today, she is a 'country girl,' and has limited experience in cities, and you live in the country, so 'all is well.'  You take a vacation or two together, and then she experiences it, and now desires it, the way only a very young girl can - it MUST happen, or the world is over.  What do you do?

My 20YO pen pal is truly incredible. She has lived much for her age, and has done much.  She is brilliant, and not yet 'spoiled' so much by life, although she is wise.  Yet, from the start, I have said we will be friends only, and even she has admitted that she *knows* her life will change significantly yet, and she will change, and learn, and grow.

Here is perhaps the simplest way to think of it - think of yourself, at 18.  Remember it.  Now, think of the women you have dated recently.  Besides from a sexual/temporary standpoint, would those women 'date' your 18YO self, or MARRY 'him,' forever?

I would think about it.  I just turned 40 last month.  My friends who *know* me do not believe I am over 35, including in actions, attitude, etc.  I have often dated younger, but in the US, my youngest 'natural fit' that I believe for long term, is likely 29-30.  The awesome RW I am going to meet in several days is 27, and it was a concern from the start, which she has done much to alleviate, not by words of 'it is no problem,' but in how she talks of growing up, and her life, and the life she would like to have.  It is *still* a concern for me.

You are talking of a 18-19 year age gap.  That would be a 22-23YO for me.  I would date that age, and have, but it is a 'fun ride,' I would not marry.  At 22, my fiance was 30.  It was a very good fit, for us.  I did not choose her by age, but by who she was - and maturity was a big part of it, emotional maturity, and personality.  When I was 26, I also dated someone a woman who it turns out was 42, but she was very attractive to me, intelligent, so we had a decent relationship, and I did not initially worry about age, because I was living in the moment.  As it turns out, she was *too* mature.  She wanted long term, and I started to think about it..something you have heard others write here.  We were unlikely to have children together.  She would be 65, retiring, and I would be solidly in my career yet.  It was unfair to continue with her, as I realized, it was unlikely to work for me - I was very active and adventurous (ok, I still am), and she was..to a point, but slowing down, already.  It was not fair to 'waste' the time in her life that she very much *wanted* to find 'the right one for her.'  

I apologize, I do not seem to write many short posts, perhaps because I mostly post in topics I have real interest in.
I do not have much in person RW experience, but many communications.  
As a general rule as a starting point for *any* women, I believe 5-10 years is OK, can even be good, depending on the people involved, once actual stable maturity and personality development has been reached.  That does not apply to those who succumb to peer pressure at high school or college, still. :)  This happens for most by their mid 20s sufficiently, again, in my opinion, although there will still be some level of changes yet to develop.  Some seem to never hit it!
Anything more than that, it requires taking a *very* hard look at the people involved, harder for every year difference.  Assuming she is reasonably mature, you can usually add a few years on if she already has a child, or a particularly difficult life, as she has been forced to mature earlier through real life.
It is possible as well, to perhaps add another 2 years 'on the top' of that, if she is a *mature* FSUW.  
I would say you can add perhaps another few, if she is over late 30s, in most cases.  She will still have new *experiences* and developments, but her personality and core is not likely to change much.

Add it up, and you'll see it still falls close to what most are telling you.  If you are older, 10-15 years is the maximum.  At the age you are, and the age that places these girls, I would not go below 25 without serious thought about longer term, how you will age and live together.

I may of course be biased - I have found women to be beautiful at many ages, but some of that beauty is certainly from within.  Would you prefer to have a *woman* who understands how to show true affection and caring, and has life experiences, that you can have real conversations with, or simply be reminded daily to ensure you bring her some bubble gum? :D

Best of luck, in whatever you decide to pursue, though! :)

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Wild Orchid on August 30, 2009, 06:30:33 PM
Why would a 37 yo be attracted to an 18 yo?  Great sex, or so they think.  Probably the same for Cougars (older females seeking a much younger guy).
how can be sex with someone who hardly knows what (s)he is doing be great? If the girl at 18 is very experienced in sex wouldn't it be a red flag?

Quote
I would not fault any 37 yo guy for having sex with an 18 yo girl ( or 37 yo Lady with an 18 yo boy) since at that age everyone involved is a consenting adult, at least in the US. It is not illegal.
The same question applies, especially if we are talking about women. I don't want to be a teacher in bed, not interested what so ever. I wouldn't find 18 yo boy attractive what so ever..  28 yo man? Very much so...  :innocent:

In all this threads where young girls and I mean in their early 20-s talk about why they prefer older men, sex is huge part of an attraction, they prefer to have sex with experienced partners, not some horny novice. What men prefer in sex now is total mystery to me. I guess it is just a conquest - he got her in bed and that's all that matters.  ::)


Quote
  However, the issue here is marrying an 18, 19, or 20 yo.  It is possible and I am sure there are happy stories out there with young RWs and much older WMs, but as I posted earlier, if a guy decides to do this he should realize that he is taking a lot of risk on top of the cultural differences, and so on.  Once again, I would emphasize that marrying an 18, 19, or 20 yo is an extremely risky proposition not for the faint of heart. 
I'm sure there are many success stories but not with 18-20 yo. If I'm not wrong Olga Conroy was that age when she married her old geezer. Did any woman believed in her professing her love for him? No way...  ::)
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: FSU explorer on August 30, 2009, 10:50:13 PM
Quote
how can be sex with someone who hardly knows what (s)he is doing be great? If the girl at 18 is very experienced in sex wouldn't it be a red flag?


Nowadays 18-20 yo are not as limited in their sexual knowledge as you might think.  With regard to red flags, many if not most men have the ability to separate sex and love.  Once one has realized that it's just sex there is no need to search for red flags as long as everyone is of consenting age and then the concern shifts more toward STD avoidance. 



Quote
  The same question applies, especially if we are talking about women. I don't want to be a teacher in bed, not interested what so ever. I wouldn't find 18 yo boy attractive what so ever..  28 yo man? Very much so...  :innocent:


Some men, actually, don't mind trading  some experience for a tighter, fitter body.  Sex is more than just a collection of techniques learned through experience, there is a strong visual component to it.  Granted, you, personally wouldn't find an 18 yo attractive but it doesn't mean others would not, and who are we to judge someone's sexual preferences as long as it is between consenting adults (18 and over).  It would be against our basic idea that everyone has the right to life, liberty, and let me emphasize the pertinent part to this case: the pursuit of happiness. 

And if you disagree that this is what is meant in the US Declaration of Independence let me point out that this little part was used in the US Supreme Court 1967 decision Loving v Virginia, which dealt with that state's statutes against interracial marriages.

Quote
   I'm sure there are many success stories but not with 18-20 yo. If I'm not wrong Olga Conroy was that age when she married her old geezer. Did any woman believed in her professing her love for him? No way...  ::)


Yes I agree maybe there aren't that many success stories, but why should anyone try to stop or criticize what consenting adults decide to do on their own free will.  All we can do is point out the obvious pitfalls and dangers inherent in such age-asymmetric relationships, and wish them best of luck, because most likely they will need it.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Wild Orchid on August 30, 2009, 11:53:22 PM

Nowadays 18-20 yo are not as limited in their sexual knowledge as you might think.  With regard to red flags, many if not most men have the ability to separate sex and love.  Once one has realized that it's just sex there is no need to search for red flags as long as everyone is of consenting age and then the concern shifts more toward STD avoidance. 
original post was not about sex but marriage and relationship.   



Quote
Some men, actually, don't mind trading  some experience for a tighter, fitter body.   
and how a body of 18-20 would be different to a body of 23-26 yo? 99% of women will tell you that they didn't look their best in theirs 18-20 age.

Quote
and who are we to judge someone's sexual preferences as long as it is between consenting adults (18 and over). 
again... OP was asking about relationship  not about one night stand with a tight body. Besides I'm sure women appreciate tight and firm body as much as men do, but men tend to forget about it  :P

 
Quote

And if you disagree that this is what is meant in the US Declaration of Independence let me point out that this little part was used in the US Supreme Court 1967 decision Loving v Virginia, which dealt with that state's statutes against interracial marriages.

that is something I don't need to know at all  ::)

 
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: FSU explorer on August 31, 2009, 08:00:07 PM
original post was not about sex but marriage and relationship.   


Yes, that's right, which is exactly what I was thinking when I read:" Once I was walking the street and saw some new Russian (it was long time ago) in his late 30-s chatting up very young and very attractive girl on her way from school to home, she was in school uniform and with school bag.  She was very flattered but I guess she didn't know much about pedophilia back then. "   Where did that come from?  The OP never asked anything about chasing school age girls.  What was the point of mentioning pedophilia?  He clearly stated 18 and 19 years of age. 




Quote
and how a body of 18-20 would be different to a body of 23-26 yo? 99% of women will tell you that they didn't look their best in theirs 18-20 age.

One way is if we look at Body Mass Index (BMI).  I am including a link to a chart that displays female (BMI).  Notice how there is a difference after between the ranges that you are mentioning.  Moreover, if you look at the different curves (arranged by percentiles), the larger the sample of women the higher the BMI tends to be for a given age.  Link:    http://www.halls.md/body-mass-index/womens.htm

99% of women may tell me that they didn't look their best in their 18-20 age interval, but I would take those statements with a grain of salt.    At any rate, where is this 99% figure coming from? and also 99% of women in Russia?  in FSU?  In Europe?  In the World?



 
Quote
that is something I don't need to know at all  ::)

 
The right to life, liberty and especially the pursuit of happiness clause in the Declaration of Independence can be used to defend the decision by the OP, if he chooses to marry an 18, or 19 yo.  If he decides that a 18 or 19 yo ( consenting adults, no pedophilia involved) female is the best choice for him and he is willing to take the risks that are inherent in dating someone from that age group, what can we say?  but good luck, hope it works out in the long run.    It was used in the Loving v Virginia case against race discrimination, and it could just as well be used against age-difference discrimination, as long as both individuals are consenting adults (18+), to counter insinuations that a 37 yo dating/marrying an 18 or 19 yo constitutes a pedophilic relationship.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: ECR844 on August 31, 2009, 08:08:48 PM

The right to life, liberty and especially the pursuit of happiness clause in the Declaration of Independence can be used to defend the decision by the OP, if he chooses to marry an 18, or 19 yo.  If he decides that a 18 or 19 yo ( consenting adults, no pedophilia involved) female is the best choice for him and he is willing to take the risks that are inherent in dating someone from that age group, what can we say?  but good luck, hope it works out in the long run.    It was used in the Loving v Virginia case against race discrimination, and it could just as well be used against age-difference discrimination, as long as both individuals are consenting adults (18+), to counter insinuations that a 37 yo dating/marrying an 18 or 19 yo constitutes a pedophilic relationship.


It's been my experience that predators will cling to any argument, straw, parallel, semi-rational reason, and move quickly to the irrational, argument and or justification for their actions. No matter which tact they take it, nothing makes them right, or justified..... Let's stick to factual labels and not bring your opinions on what you feel they should be into the discussion in an attempt to cloud the argument and obfuscate a tenuous position.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: skiingandrunning on August 31, 2009, 09:09:47 PM
Reading this thread made me think of my first visit to Kyiv.  I was Bowling with my then 33 y.o. girlfriend and she makes the comment, "look at the American men with the Ukrainian prostitutes".  I look a few lanes down and see two older 50+ and fat men (probably 90% certain to be Americans) bowling with  two young teenage girls.  Since this is a new scene for me I ask a stupid question, how are you so sure they are prostitutes and she responds in a very dead panned manner saying "I guess they could be their daughters, but why else would they be with them".   
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Wild Orchid on August 31, 2009, 10:09:44 PM
It is OK if you think that your opinions are of higher importance, but they don't need to be in bold or red. For that reason I couldn't even make myself to read them. Sorry  tiphat
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: hemingway on September 01, 2009, 04:58:17 AM
It's been my experience that predators will cling to any argument, straw, parallel, semi-rational reason, and move quickly to the irrational, argument and or justification for their actions. No matter which tact they take it, nothing makes them right, or justified..... Let's stick to factual labels and not bring your opinions on what you feel they should be into the discussion in an attempt to cloud the argument and obfuscate a tenuous position.
Good post. I read where a common tactic is to pursue a youngster until her 18th birthday, to avoid legal prosecution. The "but, it's legal" excuse for questionable behavior is another red flag. Why would legality become an issue? The issue is a 15+ year age difference and 18-20 year old girls. I don't think many parents, or siblings for that matter, want that guy at their front door.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: alenika on September 01, 2009, 09:25:00 AM
The "but, it's legal" excuse for questionable behavior is another red flag. Why would legality become an issue? The issue is a 15+ year age difference and 18-20 year old girls.
Very well said  :THUB:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: TomT on September 03, 2009, 09:20:17 AM
Good post. I read where a common tactic is to pursue a youngster until her 18th birthday, to avoid legal prosecution. The "but, it's legal" excuse for questionable behavior is another red flag. Why would legality become an issue? The issue is a 15+ year age difference and 18-20 year old girls. I don't think many parents, or siblings for that matter, want that guy at their front door.

It doesn't really make much difference whether a teenager marries another teenager or a man in his thirties, forties or fifties. In most cases, she is not ready to marry anyone and the union is doomed irrespective of her partner's age. If anything, marrying an older man might lend stability to the relationship but it probably wouldn't be enough to save it in any case.

There is a place where one should draw the line, though: she should definitely not marry a man who is already dead.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Leo512 on September 03, 2009, 10:29:27 AM
18 years old is an adult, maybe not for most people but you have the draw the line somewhere and 18 is a good number,.., if your traditionally raised, with some common sense, sure it can work...i know many who have married in their early twenties (before 22) and are still together..
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: froid on September 03, 2009, 10:32:28 AM
Quote
18 years old is an adult, maybe not for most people but you have the draw the line somewhere and 18 is a good number,.., if your traditionally raised, with some common sense, sure it can work...i know many who have married in their early twenties (before 22) and are still together..

So from your above comment...is the number 18 or 22?  Make up your mind.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: fireeater on September 03, 2009, 11:07:11 AM
Depending on the two people involved marrying young may or may not work out. No set pattern from what I can determine. Most at this age may like to marry but are not finshed school, so it is delayed until they are. I would say it depends on the reasons they wish to marry, whether it works or not, no different then someone else older marrying.  tiphat

My cousins wife was 20 when she married, they have celebrated their 50Th now.  :party0031:

Another person I know, has now a married daughter at 17. Married with both parents blessing, and permission. Will it work, only time will show this. But on last report she is now pregnant (at 19) , so things seem to be proceding smoothly for them.  ;D 

Another friend married at the beginning of university and was divorced two years later.  :(

So it can be hit or miss, depends one both involved in it.  8)

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Chemist on September 07, 2009, 09:03:22 PM
  
Quote
The age group I'm focusing on is women ages 22-29


I think this is too young of an age range.  I'm about the same age as you are and have not found the level of maturity I would expect in any woman younger than 30 years old from the FSU.  The young girls haven't had to endure much hardship.  They've only heard stories about what their parents and grandparents have told about the bad times.  Many of them have their own flats--paid for or rented for by their parents.  Consequently, they'll have the mentality of adolescents rather than adults.  What hard decisions have they made?  What have they been forced to do without?  This is what forges maturity.

Quote
but like I said if women who are 18/19/20 are interested in getting to know me then I don't have a problem in getting to them better. 

You mean if a HOT GIRL 18/19/20 is interested in getting to know me..yadda..yadda...yadda...

If these were plain Janes.  You wouldn't be asking us about this.
 
Quote
I am not only looking for women 18 or 19 I just think that If they want to get to know me i'm willing to chat with them and see what develops out of that.


You're wasting your time.  Trust me, that this endeavor will take longer than you think.  Stick to your original age range and whatever plan you have going for you.  Don't try picking a flower that you already determined was too young for you.

If you are so interested in seeing what develops by chatting with teenagers, then stick with the ones that live near you.  Same difference.

Quote
Like I said, 22 and up is what i'm looking at.

Then ditch the 18-21 year olds.
 
Quote
I have just started my search and I have only put my profile on top agencies (gold and white list) not scam agencies or black list agencies.


White and gold list agencies won't protect you from scammers.  What white and gold list means, in reality, is that they will remove profiles that have been found to be scammers.  That means that somebody still needs to make a compaint.  Or the agency, itself isn't encourageing scamming.

Scammers can  still get themselves listed on Gold agencies.

Quote
I have not spent that much money just a few dollars. Now i'm only testing out my profile to see what kind of response I get


What do you think the girls are doing?  You think they aren't doing the same thing?  You think that maybe that 18 year old that winks at you wants to see if she's got the looks to snag a rich sugar daddy if she wants to? 

Except that it's free for them.  And this is an important point:  There is literally no risk for a girl to put up a profile and talk to you and have you come visit her and spend your money on her.  Many such ladies are just curious and will only waste your time and money.  And don't bother confronting them about this.  They won't believe that they are really scamming you or leading you on.  They think they are looking for love and they don't mind letting 100 guys visit them and taking them to nice restaurants and receiving nice gifts.

I have met such girls through the gold list agencies.  If you are simply trying to test your profile, why not post it on a free site?

Quote
I don't consider myself an out-of-this-world good looking guy, just a fair looking guy with a fit shape because I have dedicated myself to a lifestyle of sport and exercise. I know looks come and go for both men and women that's why i'm also looking for the inner beauty besides the physical beauty these great women offer. In my profile I make sure to mention that the inner person is one of my top priorities.


I don't believe you.

If I had a nickle for every guy that I heard this from, I could retire.

I'll tell you what I DO see--something I see very often.  I guy seems to have good intentions in finding a wife in the FSU and once he gets a little attention from women outside of his league, he gets sex-crazed and forgets why he decided to do this in the first place.  He rationalize this by saying something along the lines of: "Why can't I enjoy myself a little until I find Mrs Right."

It won't work.

Quote
So right now i'm doing my homework and see what path I will choose. I still hope to hear from you guys.  Thanks again.

It seems like you still need to hit the books  :reading:

I know this reply seems harsh, but I need to tell you that if you decide to do this, you'll be swimming among sharks.  DO NOT LOSE YOUR FOCUS!
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Wild Orchid on September 08, 2009, 01:51:42 AM
(http://cjameswriter.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/men.png)
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: sparky114 on September 08, 2009, 02:17:14 AM
(http://cjameswriter.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/men.png)


 :bow: :bow: :bow: :chuckle: :chuckle: :chuckle:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: TomT on September 08, 2009, 07:10:44 AM
WO,

Where did you find the photo of me?
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: sparky114 on September 08, 2009, 07:44:06 AM
WO,

Where did you find the photo of me?

That will be the one on the right  Tom........... :chuckle:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: TomT on September 08, 2009, 05:22:46 PM
Да
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: cufflinks on September 08, 2009, 05:34:55 PM
In all seriousness I keep falling back on the old wise man's advice of the perfect age difference is one half the mans age plus 7 give or take depending upon each persons level of maturity and education not to mention economic situation. Idea is he will be the older wiser and worldly man and she the beautiful young rose... at all stages.

Man - Woman:

20 - 17

30 - 22

40 - 27

50 - 32

60 - 37

For me I have to say I am a bit more comfortable with one half the mans age plus 10 - of course if I found a 28 year old with a younger child as in pre teen - I could be tempted as the blush is off the rose and nothing makes one mature so much as having to feed another smaller human being who does not listen to excuses well!

20 - 20

30 - 25

40 - 30

50 - 35

60 - 40

I keep reading that 40 is the new 30 what ever that is supposed to mean...

Of course the current economic meltdown has hit the over 40 white male population an astounding 80% more than females in the USA (Hardest hit industries; building, manufacturing, automotive, real estate, finance, stock markets - least hit; health care, education, government etc.).  I just got a call from a builder friend who is facing foreclosure on two very nice homes he built and was renting but at a loss and can no longer carry the losses... there will be some major bargains here over the next 24 to 48 months - so my insight is that economics always rule in the end.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Chemist on September 08, 2009, 05:35:33 PM
I love it, Orchid.  I'm saving THAT one!
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Wild Orchid on September 08, 2009, 05:54:06 PM
 :innocent:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Stirlitz on September 09, 2009, 03:04:15 PM
Hello guys, I would like to know if a sincere and serious about marriage woman age 18 or 19 would be interested and serious about getting married to a 37 year old man. I say this because i'm a fair looking guy in fit, trim, always excersising and in healthy shape with an average life style. What do you guys think, is it possible for her and I to make a good match? Plus I  get winks or replies from women in this 18/19/20 age group besides the other age groups. Is it possible.  Thanks.
Forget about it (sorry if I am rude). Unless you want to experience one of those crash and burn stories. Or, probably more than one :)

95% of women of that age are just kids who are legal to… er, to have sex with. Go out, have fun. But not marry — would you marry a child even if it was legal? In my opinion and experience as well as looking at others. For a long time I would not even date women younger than 25-30. I don’t think things have changed much since then. 25-35 is the best age group to target.

As for winks, you know, they don’t hurt… even if they don’t come from an agency looking for prey…
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: msmoby on September 11, 2009, 01:05:09 AM
In all seriousness I keep falling back on the old wise man's advice of the perfect age difference is one half the mans age plus 7 give or take depending upon each persons level of maturity and education not to mention economic situation. Idea is he will be the older wiser and worldly man and she the beautiful young rose... at all stages.

OK that was the "wise old man's" PoV.. Surely Cuffy is worried that the old mans' ( sorry forgot the "wise")  bride might get "wise" and more on to a more youthful, shrewd, "stallion" ;)?   


so my insight is that economics always rule in the end.


If we are talking - an ability to provide food and a roof over one's head.. security YES..that is PART of the equation..only a part of it..

*I* seriously hope you ain't taking the "wise old man's" advice TOO seriously..

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: ECR844 on September 12, 2009, 11:46:53 AM
Apparently the other dozen age related threads with the same regurgitated logic and opinions weren't enough to keep this elasticized drivel from stretching on for 4 pages... Hopefully by now the Op has read them all and gotten a clue... Can we close this thread now?
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: yarm on September 12, 2009, 12:04:10 PM
(http://cjameswriter.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/men.png)

My Russian girlfriend is 19, I'm 38. We didn't meet online. I'm actually in better shape than the guy in the first picture. He looks a little soft and has a little fat to loose on his abs. ;)


Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: mendeleyev on September 12, 2009, 12:31:45 PM
And the condition of your abs has what to do with the complex differences in culture and life world views?
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: yarm on September 12, 2009, 12:56:09 PM
It was just a response to the notion that somehow, all 30+ men dating a 19 year old must be fat slobs whom the girl can only be interested in as part of a scam.

As for world views and lifestyle and such, not everyone is the same. There are 40 year olds, who lead different lives than the average 40 year old, and 19 year olds who are the same.

My girlfriend has no interest in clubbing and partying and tells me she'd rather stay at home and cook for me when I offer to take her out. It's unusual for a girl her age, I think, but she is who she is. The girl I dated before her, who was 23, wanted to go out all the time, so did my ex-wife at 32 when we got divorced.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: mendeleyev on September 12, 2009, 02:30:24 PM
Yarm, no offense meant. As the stepDad of a 19 year old Russian girl, and at 19 they are just that--girls, there is a great difference between a 19 year old and a 26 year old for example in maturity, worldview, goals, etc.

Am I making a generalization? Happily. Its a very safe one. Everyone says they're different, and the girl is different, but to belabour a point--every guy who has a young girlfriend claims to be the exception.

I've been around a long time and can tell you that after marriage settles in, even the 10 year old difference between my wife and I has it's moments.

Enjoy it while it lasts but don't allow yourself any of the common delusions. In reality it's easier to help a 45 year old fat slob see reality eventually than a same decade guy who's in great shape.

I'm not knocking a 19 year age gap, just don't want guys to be unawares of the pitfalls either.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: jb on September 12, 2009, 02:46:42 PM
Mendy,

Good thoughts on the last post.  Likewise, no offense intended.

I've been around these boards about 12-13+ years, and married to a Russian woman for almost 9 years, dated her for over 2 years before we married.  I know lots of married mixed culture couples, and from my experience the ones that really work are the ones with a less than 15 year age gap,  9-13 years seems most common.   With only one or two exceptions, those with big age gaps (20+) are kaput after 2-3 years.  Call 'em GCG's, or whatever, but most of those marriages don't make it to 5 years.  And NONE of those girls were 18-19 y.o. when they married. 

Why would a grown man knowingly borrow trouble?
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Manny on September 12, 2009, 03:30:03 PM
I've been around these boards about 12-13+ years, and married to a Russian woman for almost 9 years, dated her for over 2 years before we married.  I know lots of married mixed culture couples, and from my experience the ones that really work are the ones with a less than 15 year age gap,  9-13 years seems most common.   With only one or two exceptions, those with big age gaps (20+) are kaput after 2-3 years.  Call 'em GCG's, or whatever, but most of those marriages don't make it to 5 years.  And NONE of those girls were 18-19 y.o. when they married. 

Why would a grown man knowingly borrow trouble?

Newbies and neophytes would be well advised to read the foregoing quote again and again. In fact, print it out and stick it by your computer monitor. Refer to it while you are surfing profiles of teenage women.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: hemingway on September 12, 2009, 04:48:27 PM
Mendy,

Good thoughts on the last post.  Likewise, no offense intended.

I've been around these boards about 12-13+ years, and married to a Russian woman for almost 9 years, dated her for over 2 years before we married.  I know lots of married mixed culture couples, and from my experience the ones that really work are the ones with a less than 15 year age gap,  9-13 years seems most common.   With only one or two exceptions, those with big age gaps (20+) are kaput after 2-3 years.  Call 'em GCG's, or whatever, but most of those marriages don't make it to 5 years.  And NONE of those girls were 18-19 y.o. when they married. 

Why would a grown man knowingly borrow trouble?
You think the numbers come out about the same, not matter what the country of origin? It seems like you might.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: jb on September 12, 2009, 05:52:18 PM
Quote
not matter what the country of origin?

I was speaking specifically of multi-cultural marriages between American men and FSU women.  Management of, and adaption to, cultural differences is a big enough problem without complicating things with generational issues as well.  
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: jb on September 12, 2009, 06:05:04 PM
If you encounter them personally, most of the guys in the pursuit of an Eastern European beauty are the nicest folks in the world until you mention age gaps, and then they flip the phuck out.  It can be very disconcerting if you’re not used to it, but once you’re acclimated, it’s cool…a polite nod and a slight indulging smile suffice until the kookiness blows over and the cartoon music stops.

It’s kind of like a very localized and specialized form of epilepsy.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: 2tallbill on September 14, 2009, 11:19:30 AM
I have a son who is 18, and he hangs out with teenage girls.
A teenage girl can be really really smart, and have a heart of
pure gold, but she is not ready for anything even remotely
close to marriage. One of the problems with teenagers is that
they think that they know everything (I surely did at that age),
their judgment and decision making ability are completely untested.

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Eduard on September 14, 2009, 08:32:00 PM
A teenage girl can be really really smart, and have a heart of
pure gold, but she is not ready for anything even remotely
close to marriage.
ESPECIALLY a marriage to a foreign man with an intent of moving to another country, away from her parents, friends, everything she knows and loves. And if she does have that intent it would be for ulterior motives, not for love.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: run...run4urlife on September 15, 2009, 05:49:45 AM
My wife was 19 and I was 39   you will find them everywhere but they are not traditionally inclined and they will leave you as soon as they possibly can
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: TomT on September 15, 2009, 07:47:59 AM
Do you think that you have fared much better with a 19-year-old American girl of comparable hotness?
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: jb on September 15, 2009, 07:55:08 AM
run...run4urlife,

Welcome to the board.

.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: cufflinks on September 15, 2009, 09:29:02 AM
If you encounter them personally, most of the guys in the pursuit of an Eastern European beauty are the nicest folks in the world until you mention age gaps, and then they flip the phuck out.  It can be very disconcerting if you’re not used to it, but once you’re acclimated, it’s cool…a polite nod and a slight indulging smile suffice until the kookiness blows over and the cartoon music stops.

It’s kind of like a very localized and specialized form of epilepsy.

JB - LOL - I laughed so hard reading this quip that I had a seizure - either that or it was from Tom Brady coming from behind to beat Buffalo last night in a 1 point win by the skin of our Patriotic teeth :smokin:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: msmoby on September 15, 2009, 11:11:58 AM
I've tried to stay off this thread..now you'll understand WHY..

The very THOUGHT of my 18 yr old daughter being interested in a guy old enough to be her dad ..

Sorry, I don't understand why this thread is "allowed"..

My tip .. Wait until you are 55 and SHE is 36/37... 

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: shakespear on September 15, 2009, 11:38:41 AM
In all seriousness I keep falling back on the old wise man's advice of the perfect age difference is one half the mans age plus 7 give or take depending upon each persons level of maturity and education not to mention economic situation. Idea is he will be the older wiser and worldly man and she the beautiful young rose... at all stages. 

Sigh. . . . . . . . . .

I'll say it one more time.

This IS NOT some wise age-old respected sage advice.  It is not attributable to the Koran or any other holy book of Muslim faith.  It comes from the mind of Spike Lee in his movie "X".  In the script of the movie Elijah Muhammad makes this statement.  It's Hollywood all the way.  Anyone that would give it even a shred of credibility is an idiot. 

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: alenika on September 15, 2009, 11:46:12 AM
My wife was 19 and I was 39   you will find them everywhere but they are not traditionally inclined and they will leave you as soon as they possibly can
You mean they should have stayed with older husbands even when find out with times that those husbands are too old for them? Older men should be wiser in the first turn. If they don't they have only themselves to blame.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: alenika on September 15, 2009, 11:48:17 AM
I agree with all Chemist said here: http://ruadventures.com/forum/index.php?topic=8285.msg119914#msg119914 (http://ruadventures.com/forum/index.php?topic=8285.msg119914#msg119914)
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: cufflinks on September 15, 2009, 11:58:54 AM
In all seriousness I keep falling back on the old wise man's advice of the perfect age difference is one half the mans age plus 7 give or take depending upon each persons level of maturity and education not to mention economic situation. Idea is he will be the older wiser and worldly man and she the beautiful young rose... at all stages.

Sigh. . . . . . . . . .

I'll say it one more time.

This IS NOT some wise age-old respected sage advice.  It is not attributable to the Koran or any other holy book of Muslim faith.  It comes from the mind of Spike Lee in his movie "X".  In the script of the movie Elijah Muhammad makes this statement.  It's Hollywood all the way.  Anyone that would give it even a shred of credibility is an idiot.  


Phock sakes Shakes - woke up on the wrong side of the bed today sport???

Nothing like taking things out of context as I also posted:

For me I have to say I am a bit more comfortable with one half the mans age plus 10 - of course if I found a 28 year old with a younger child as in pre teen - I could be tempted as the blush is off the rose and nothing makes one mature so much as having to feed another smaller human being who does not listen to excuses well!

20 - 20

30 - 25

40 - 30

50 - 35

60 - 40

I keep reading that 40 is the new 30 what ever that is supposed to mean...

Of course the current economic meltdown has hit the over 40 white male population an astounding 80% more than females in the USA (Hardest hit industries; building, manufacturing, automotive, real estate, finance, stock markets - least hit; health care, education, government etc.).  I just got a call from a builder friend who is facing foreclosure on two very nice homes he built and was renting but at a loss and can no longer carry the losses... there will be some major bargains here over the next 24 to 48 months - so my insight is that economics always rule in the end.

****************************************************

Shakey - I normally like to read what you have to say but time out for a Whiskey Tango Foxtrot moment here Captain!

In fact it was told to me as a young nuclear submariner serving at sea by a wise old Senior Chief with more time backing down on the middle level crapper than you or I had in total service.  Long before "Spike" Lee's momma bought him his first camera and way before he thought Spike might make a cool name for a movie director.  Fact is Spike "borrowed" the idea himself.

P.S. How about posting something useful, helpful and non freaking insulting - or too novel an idea for you.  Please help me understand where in the USA you live that its a good idea to walk up to strangers and call them idiots to their faces and why its a good idea and OK in your mind to do so on a forum???

Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: shakespear on September 15, 2009, 12:15:39 PM
P.S. How about posting something useful, helpful and non freaking insulting - or too novel an idea for you. Please help me understand where in the USA you live that its a good idea to walk up to strangers and call them idiots to their faces and why its a good idea and OK in your mind to do so on a forum???

Like an umpire, I call 'em as I see 'em

Sometimes you have to be direct to make sure some neophyte doesn't think the bullshit that's being spewed has some credibility.

No insult toward you intended unless you actually believe that nonsense about some magical formula for age guidelines.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: fireeater on September 15, 2009, 12:16:43 PM
I've tried to stay off this thread..now you'll understand WHY..

The very THOUGHT of my 18 yr old daughter being interested in a guy old enough to be her dad ..

Sorry, I don't understand why this thread is "allowed"..

My tip .. Wait until you are 55 and SHE is 36/37... 



Moby

There is a difference between a women being ready at this age for marriage and a large age gap marriage. Or one marrying some one old enough to be considered her father.  :nod:

Now from what I have seen and heard, my males cousin's son who is  21 now is ready to marry the girl he has been seeing for 3 years. And she is the same. But both are waiting till closer to their education time has finished, and they are more financially ready. So one could be ready, but not have the means yet to accomplish it. If they ever figure out how to do both, the wedding bells will ring.  :chuckle:

If she is marrying someone closer to her own age, then it could work. Or are you telling your daughter to wait till she is 36.  :biggrin:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: msmoby on September 15, 2009, 01:09:08 PM
There is a difference between a women being ready at this age for marriage and a large age gap marriage. Or one marrying some one old enough to be considered her father.  :nod:

If she is marrying someone closer to her own age, then it could work. Or are you telling your daughter to wait till she is 36.  :biggrin:

Sorry, FE, I think I made it *quite clear* - I'm being specific to the OP's thread question .. not age gaps in general  .. I've already posted what I think of certain "wise" old men's adages.. !




Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: fireeater on September 15, 2009, 01:43:15 PM
There is a difference between a women being ready at this age for marriage and a large age gap marriage. Or one marrying some one old enough to be considered her father.  :nod:

If she is marrying someone closer to her own age, then it could work. Or are you telling your daughter to wait till she is 36.  :biggrin:

Sorry, FE, I think I made it *quite clear* - I'm being specific to the OP's thread question .. not age gaps in general  .. I've already posted what I think of certain "wise" old men's adages.. !







We already have a few threads on age gaps, and a lot of the comments in this one relates to whether a women 18-25 is capable of being married sucessfully regardless of the male's age. You already know mine on age gaps marriage.  :) So it actually comes down to whether a male or female is ready for marriage until they reach a magical age in life. Since your daugther is already considered an adult, at what age would she be eligable in your eyes to marry. Or would it be determned by her thoughts and understanding of what she is doing. See the difference in threads.  ;D     
 
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: ECR844 on September 15, 2009, 01:46:01 PM
Oedipus called and wanted to give a shout out to all his peeps.. :nod:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: msmoby on September 15, 2009, 01:56:25 PM

So it actually comes down to whether a male or female is ready for marriage until they reach a magical age in life. Since your daugther is already considered an adult, at what age would she be eligable in your eyes to marry. Or would it be determned by her thoughts and understanding of what she is doing. See the difference in threads.  ;D      
 

FE.. MY daughter is not an adult.. YET..soon.. but not yet..

I'm quite SURE she isn't ready to settle down, yet..  especially not with a guy old enough to be her Dad...  If she felt she WAS - then there'd be very little I could do about it -  except wait for the near inevitable train crash ...
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: fireeater on September 15, 2009, 02:13:59 PM

So it actually comes down to whether a male or female is ready for marriage until they reach a magical age in life. Since your daugther is already considered an adult, at what age would she be eligable in your eyes to marry. Or would it be determned by her thoughts and understanding of what she is doing. See the difference in threads.  ;D      
 

FE.. MY daughter is not an adult.. YET..soon.. but not yet..

I'm quite SURE she isn't ready to settle down, yet..  especially not with a guy old enough to be her Dad...  If she felt she WAS - then there'd be very little I could do about it -  except wait for the near inevitable train crash ...


What is the age there 19. Sometimes hard to keep track of the different ones. Even some of our provinces vary here for that. Not one old enough to be her father, one in her own age range.  :chuckle: My son is not ready either at this point and he is older then yours.  But I also expect when he decides he is, he will put everything he has into it, and not delude himself about it. I expect a lot of questions will come about then, from him.. So I will have some warning, he is thinking about it.  :laugh:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: tainted on October 19, 2009, 01:46:40 PM
well...what i dont understand is that i have been looking through the sites that this place said doesnt do scams and i see  a lot of 18-19 year old beauties looking for guys in their mid 40's to mid 50's..
so...if this place says that those date sites arent scams then why do all those teen age girls want 50 year old men ?
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: andrewfi on October 19, 2009, 02:02:39 PM
Because these agencies are selling fantasies to old men and old men want young girls.

Not many 24 year old American boys so hard up for women and so well off for money that they can consider a foreign bride from any country.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Vinnvinny on October 19, 2009, 02:19:27 PM
so...if this place says that those date sites aren't scams then why do all those teen age girls want 50 year old men ?

What Andrew said plus there's many a teenage Smokinghotkova looking for sponsorship not love and likewise, there's many men out there (local & foreign) who are able to and happy to pay money for some fun times. The optimum word you mentioned is 'date' sites.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: I/O on October 19, 2009, 04:06:58 PM
well...what i dont understand is that i have been looking through the sites that this place said doesnt do scams and i see  a lot of 18-19 year old beauties looking for guys in their mid 40's to mid 50's..
so...if this place says that those date sites arent scams then why do all those teen age girls want 50 year old men ?
Figure out the difference between scam and BS then you'll get it. Both can lead you to destruction but one is slightly more subtle than the other.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: ecocks on October 19, 2009, 04:21:57 PM
In answer to OP, NO.

Advice to the OP: Don't be a fool.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: mendeleyev on October 19, 2009, 11:17:24 PM
Next time I get a chance to photo a couple of native Russians or Ukrainians who have found love as a young woman/older guy, I'll snap some frames.

Don't hold your breath however. Don't see too often here.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: andrewfi on October 20, 2009, 02:50:54 AM
Next time I get a chance to photo a couple of native Russians or Ukrainians who have found love as a young woman/older guy, I'll snap some frames.

Don't hold your breath however. Don't see too often here.

What is love?
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Vinnvinny on October 20, 2009, 10:08:05 AM
What is love?

“I would love to have sex with you”

“I would love some Jimmy Choo’s”

Arrh, a romance based on ‘love’ is born.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: andrewfi on October 20, 2009, 01:09:30 PM
What is love?

“I would love to have sex with you”

“I would love some Jimmy Choo’s”

Arrh, a romance based on ‘love’ is born.


I'd not call that a love relationship but fun for both parties - why not. although one part might enjoy the shoes more than the sex and the other the sex more than the shoes - unless you are a shoe fetishist like me. ;)
In the end though there seems in relationships to be some kind of exchange of value and love is the lubricant that makes it easier during adverse times and makes life more fun in good times. Basically, love alone will not make a relationship, other stuff is needed too!
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: shakespear on October 20, 2009, 01:19:04 PM
In the end though there seems in relationships to be some kind of exchange of value and love is the lubricant that makes it easier during adverse times and makes life more fun in good times. Basically, love alone will not make a relationship, other stuff is needed too!

I'd say mutual respect is just as important as love in maintaining a relationship - especially critical in making a marriage work long term. 
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: andrewfi on October 20, 2009, 02:08:03 PM
Strange thing. Men tend to talk of respect in the same way that women tend to talk of love.
We men value respect over love in most relationships and women vice versa. I have had experiences where this has led to confusion.
For myself I do not see how you can love somebody without respecting them but I understand that some men claim to love but obviously show no repsect at all to their partner. I don't think I have seen a woman who loves, in ways that I understand, without showing respect.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: TomT on October 20, 2009, 02:47:49 PM
What is really crappy is when gets respect but not love.  :fighting0004:
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: Turboguy on October 20, 2009, 02:52:38 PM
Well, I will agree that personally I could not love someone and be disrespectful to them.    I to think you can love someone you don't respect.   I think one example would be a woman married to an abusive husband.   I will agree their mind and sense of self worth is pretty messed up but I to think most of them would love their husband but not respect him.   I would say when my first fiancee went back.  I felt I was in love with her at the time but I saw all the stuff she pulled and a lot of the goofy way her mind worked and I definately didn't respect her.    I do think in a healthy relationship there would be a combination of love and respect but not all relationships are healthy.

A agree with Tom that getting respect and not love when what you really want is love is a bummer.
Title: Re: Women 18 and 19 years of age
Post by: andrewfi on October 20, 2009, 04:29:38 PM
TG that's why I wrote about 'love in ways that I would understand'. I can not see the woman who 'loves' a man who abuses her as loving that man - or vice versa. Both might use the word 'love' but for the woman it is more about fear and acceptance of her fatethan love as I see it. Recently I have found myself way too up close and personal to some of this and that was why I wrote as I did. Two people, an abuser and an abusee. The abuser claims he loves the woman he terrorises and that his dominance and power taking is simply his way of showing his 'love'.
The woman, from the school of 'he beats me so he must love me' believes he loves her becasue he goes to great lengths to dominate and abuse her.
I can not see this kind of relationship as being about love in any way that I understand and I know the woman very well. There is no respect on either side. She is fearful and has her self worth destroyed but respect does not come from cruel fear and he has no respect for her because he sees her as weak woman and not worthy of his respect - no matter that he made her as she is.