Dating & Marriage With Women From Russia, Ukraine, Belarus & FSU > Dating in the FSU and Other Countries
Ye Olde Age Difference
DonA:
Well it is very early on this Sunday morning. My little Lady is still asleep of course ;D so I am sitting her looking at the board and since I am a little bored right now I figured I would try stir things up a little by starting this thread. I know that age difference is a sore subject to some and the debate can get heated. I kind of want to do an experiment here and see if this board will behave differently on this subject then on the other boards.
As for myself.
From the time my first wife and I separated I dated young Ladies from the early to late twenties. The oldest Lady I dated here in Az was 28. For a time I live with a crazy GCG from Belarus who was 21-22 at the time (another story for another time ;D ) So in my world dating ladies a whole lot younger then I was not a stretch.
As far as Yulia;
Yulia’s ideal guy would have been a Russian guy between the ages of 30 and 35. Yulia was more then a little surprised when she realized she was attracted to me and even more surprised that she fell in love with me.
As far as US;
Well we are coming up on 4 years as a couple and neither of us feel or see the age difference.
A little true story
A couple of years ago Yulia and I were having a discussion about her Mom and how her Mom needed to change the way she was doing some things. Yulia said to me that I needed to understand that her Mom is a lot older then me and it would be difficult for her to change things at her age. I told her ;Yulia your mother is only 7 years older then me :o Yulia, while bug eyed said…oh yeah I forgot about that :o
So folks what is your experience and / or thoughts on Age Difference
DonAz
bgreed:
Well Don since both you and I get better looking the older we get it's no surprise to be able to date younger women. :) 8)
I think sometimes we perceive ourselves as older than we appear. For example I was talking to a lady the other night at a party she had her two daughters with her 6 and 4 I comment how cute they were and that I remebered when my kids were that age. When I told her that my son will be sixteen in September and my daughter fourteen next month she couldn't believe I looked old enough to have kids that age. And believe me there's enough snow on the roof to prove it. :)
Now when it comes to FSUW, well Lena has always liked more mature men. Maybe it is because in her first marriage that didn't go well was someone her own age. Al we know is that we're a perfect match for eachother in everyway and right now being apart just drives us both nuts.
So I think if you are willing to keep yourself up mentally and physically that you can have a lot of very good years together. By the way Lena and I are twenty two years different in age and it seems no matter who we meet their comment is always to the effect that " you two look like such a couple !"
Now I'm going to diverge here with a shot story from ou first meeting. Lena took me to see a large old church in Sumy which is a beautiful old Russian orthodox church. We went in through the 16' tall cast iron doors bought some candles to light from the babushka on duty. We spent a while looking and me oooing and ahhing over the architecture (tough to believe I'm in the building trads huh :) ) Well on the way out the old babushka stops Lena and starts talking to her. Now my Russian is pretty limited, but it was pretty obvious I or we were the topic of conversation. On the walk back to Lenas apartment I asked her what the babuska had said. I was told that she said a number of things but the main part is that she felt we were a blessed couple. :) ;D 8)
There are a few other interesting stories but I will save them for another time.
Patrick:
It is amazing at times how they forget the age difference. To them we are just their husband . I have it good now. Marynas mom is here with us so we see her everyday. There is almost as much difference in between her mom and I as there is between Maryna and I. People do look and wonder at times I think , hum wonder who that man in the middle is ? I am to the point now where I don't think about it like I use to.
Turboguy:
Damn, here goes the neighborhood!!! :-*
Personally Don, I don't think people with over 5 years age difference should be together and you and Yulia probably only think you are happy and should get divorced. Sure.
The only comment I disagree with in page one of what will likely be a 40 page thread is bgreeds comment that we percieve ourselves as older than we are. I think for most people they look in the mirror to shave and try to figure out who that older guy looking back at us is and how he got inside our medicine cabinet.
I agree with everyone's post. VWRW and I have more age difference than most and we never even think about it.
Chris:
My ex wife and I were the same age, we were married nearly 20 years, I guess we just grew apart after having the kids etc, she walked out for someone else and I ended up looking after my three kids for around 7 years (and still) until they finished school and eventually all got good jobs, my youngest was 18 last week and is also now working also.
Around 3 years ago I split up with a British lady who I had been with 3-4 years, she was 14 years younger than me, the age difference was never a problem, in fact it was a positive advantage at times, I am now involved with a RW who is 10 years younger than me, we have no problems with the age difference, in fact on the contrary this and my last relationships both women have said they prefer men to be a few years or so older than them, 5 -15 years older was never a problem. I think they feel more secure if the man is some years older.
In my opinion though age has nothing or at most very little to do with why relationships fall apart, age is in the mind, you are as old as you feel, in fact wasn't it May West who said "you are only as old as the women you feel" ;D
Some people are old before their time, I know some guys in their thirties who act like they are really in their sixties and some who are in their sixties who act like they are teenagers. Everyone of us is different, I am 49 but have a young outlook on life and personally still think I am young. Positive or optimistic people like myself think differently to pesemistic or negative people, so the age factor can be looked at completely differently by the two groups.
Again I personally consider age to be more of an attitude factor rather than a physical factor. Of course when the age difference is 25, 30 years or more then it probably does have more of a bearing on the relationship, for all sorts of reasons. But then again, I know couples who have age differences of 30 years + with their Russian wives and some have been married going on for 10 years now and they are as strong as ever. :)
What does it matter what the age difference is, as long as the couple themselves are happy then it is no one elses business!
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