First time attemting to date a Ukrainian girl

[LoyalMan]

• Never join any thing organised by your pen-friend, her agency or the dating site involved.
• Never post any self photo on your own profile.
• Hold video and audio conference with her and observe her sub-conscious response.
• Check her background by private investigator.

If all pass, she is a good candidate.

[2tallbill]

• Never join any thing organised by your pen-friend, her agency or the dating site involved.
• Never post any self photo on your own profile.
• Hold video and audio conference with her and observe her sub-conscious response.
• Check her background by private investigator.

If all pass, she is a good candidate.

One post wonder

Paranoia big destroya,   

Loyal dewd,
If you don't trust a woman then you dump her, you
don't hire a private investigator. I'm sorry you've had
such bad experiences, but most FSUW aren't bad. If
you keep finding bad ones then you are doing something
wrong.

Udachi!

Bill

[MBS01]

Seems the OP has been a 1 post wonder and disappeared long months ago.

However for others reading here have to agree with 2Tall; B.B. and Andrew as they all have long histories on these forums and know what they are talking about.  As to age back when I was actually looking I was already older than the OP as was my wife of over 16 years older than some of the OP's contacts.  Just saying keep your expectations reasonable and likely so will be your outcomes.

As to agency sites I still see the FREE ones here that worked for us and others.  Also Flats in Kiev etc. can be easy to find instead of ones suggested on agency sites too.  Just ask and many of us have used them and will recommend if you ask or send a PM.

So for the OP or other newer adventurers just get on a plane and enjoy the adventure however you do it.

[Steveboy]

• Never join any thing organised by your pen-friend, her agency or the dating site involved.
• Never post any self photo on your own profile.
• Hold video and audio conference with her and observe her sub-conscious response.
• Check her background by private investigator.

If all pass, she is a good candidate.

• Check her background by private investigator.

[/b]  If you need to hire a private Investigator to check any women background you certainly not normal..

Firstly they cannot check any women's background..

Secondly the private investigator will probably rip you off as much as a scammer..

Thirdly you will make yourself look real stupid ....

[2tallbill]

Firstly they cannot check any women's background..

Secondly the private investigator will probably rip you off as much as a scammer..

Thirdly you will make yourself look real stupid ....

Loyal Man had some bad experiences with FSUW years ago and
blames 100% of FSUW as a result.

[andrewfi]

Loyal Man had some bad experiences with FSUW years ago and
blames 100% of FSUW as a result.

That's a shame. I don't think that one can have a decent relationship until one is able to trust the people one seeks to have a relationship with. That's not about proving stuff - there will always be something new to prove. It is about oneself. It is about one's own willingness to take a chance on a relatively unknown person.

Also, nobody is going to be completely reliable (trustworthy) in every situation. But, as we learn and get to know a person better we come to understand that person's strengths and weaknesses. In general, I try to not test people in areas that I know they are unlikely to be reliable, or at the least to account for those areas in my life and planning.

If a person ever feels the need to test a person or have them investigated then one is in a relationship that one should not be in - not because of the other person, but because of oneself.

[dcguyusa]

Firstly they cannot check any women's background..

You need to hire that guy on the TV show "Cheaters".  The guy and his crew tail the target all day and night and provides a video report to the person who has doubts about the partner.  Then, there is the confrontation when the target is met by the partner and then all hell breaks loose when the evidence is shown and the "other person" is present as well.      

[andrewfi]

Firstly they cannot check any women's background..

You need to hire that guy on the TV show "Cheaters".  The guy and his crew tail the target all day and night and provides a video report to the person who has doubts about the partner.  Then, there is the confrontation when the target is met by the partner and then all hell breaks loose when the evidence is shown and the "other person" is present as well.      

The legal system in Russia and Ukraine is not the same as in the United States. Unless the laws in those countries have changed then 'investigations' of the type you suggest are illegal. That's not to say that there are not people claiming to offer such services, but it also means that the people making such offers are almost certainly going to take your money and not provide genuine services. You certainly could not rely upon such service providers.

In the past, there were people who claimed to offer such services to lovelorn and insecure foreign guys. None were genuine.

Here's a link to a business that claims to offer services to such people: https://privateinvestigator-*ukraine*.com/services/ Look at what they actually offer. See how, in reality, the information is very limited and is little, or nothing, more than one can learn by meeting a person and seeing their ID card.
More information here: http://detective-crimea.com/en/private-detective-in-ukrainian

A copy of the proposed law on detective agencies in Ukraine: http://w1.c1.rada.gov.ua/pls/zweb2/webproc4_1?pf3511=57580
Basically, at this time, detective agencies have no legal standing meaning that many of their claimed operations are illegal.

If one is so unsure of one's ability to know about a person or trust one's own judgement, then one is not ready for a serious relationship anyway. Meaning that if you have to ask the question, you shouldn't proceed with the relationship. Save the money and retire to your wank chariot.

Look at it this way, from a practical perspective: given that it is illegal for a private individual to stalk another person in these countries, how much do you think it would cost you, per day, to encourage somebody to do that work? Given that by showing yourself to be a gullible and insecure person, why would an 'investigator' provide honest reporting and risk his, or her, freedom and livelihood? All that needs to be done is to tell you that your target is a bad person, take your money at no risk to themself. You go away a sadder and poorer person, your target will wonder why she hears nothing from you, no risk to the 'investigator' to whom you have just paid several months average wages.

[LoyalMan]

Here is the best advice you will ever get in your life!!

FORGET ABOUT UKRAINIAN GIRLS!!

SEARCH FOR A WOMEN IN Russia/Belarusia/Moldova or some where nearer home.. will save you soooooooooo much heartache and problems..

And when you do try these countries stick to women about 40 years old you will have no problems then... I know it maybe a little disappointing to hear some guy tell you to
stick to that age group.. but it's a realistic age for you..

Of course if you look kind of handsome have a big bank account , have a gift of the gab , a good sex drive and a few other things then you may get away with finding a younger women.. its life and life sucks

Can you tell us why we should not date Ukrainian women nowadays?  Is it because you are doing M/F business in Russia?  I am ready to go there later.  I want to hit the SPOT precisely!

I also have woman pen-friends from Russia, Ukraine and Moldova.  Some of them are cheating wives.

[Steveboy]

Here is the best advice you will ever get in your life!!

FORGET ABOUT UKRAINIAN GIRLS!!

SEARCH FOR A WOMEN IN Russia/Belarusia/Moldova or some where nearer home.. will save you soooooooooo much heartache and problems..

And when you do try these countries stick to women about 40 years old you will have no problems then... I know it maybe a little disappointing to hear some guy tell you to
stick to that age group.. but it's a realistic age for you..

Of course if you look kind of handsome have a big bank account , have a gift of the gab , a good sex drive and a few other things then you may get away with finding a younger women.. its life and life sucks

Can you tell us why we should not date Ukrainian women nowadays?  Is it because you are doing M/F business in Russia?  I am ready to go there later.  I want to hit the SPOT precisely!

I also have woman pen-friends from Russia, Ukraine and Moldova.  Some of them are cheating wives.

There is nothing wrong with dating Ukrainian women IF you find a genuine one!

And there are a few genuine Ukrainian women seeking marriage BUT very few!! Very very very few!!

The whole Ukraine bride industry is built on scam and most women know this, it is an easy opportunity to make money.. scam some guys .. If you are keyed up on everything and experienced in all this shit then it is not such a problem to find a genuine Ukrainian women and that is PROVIDING your expectations are realistic.. if they are not your doomed any way..

If you had no experience searching for a Ukrainian women, never been to Ukraine and seeking some beauty then your wasting your time starting your searches in Ukraine.. you will be eaten alive and shit out on the street and probably come back broke..

Best for any newbies to start in a country with not such a bad reputation.. Belarus seems not to bad a place to make a start..

As for cheating house wives Im not sure where you got that saying from.. Cheating housewives ? Where are they?

Scammers yes but cheating housewives no..

[LoyalMan]

Let me also give my very accurate tips to those newbies of online dating.

If a woman tells you, from the very beginning of communication, that:

• she is God-fearing.
• she is very serious at finding a foreign husband
• she is not playing game

Then, s/he is a Scammer.  Full Stop.

[andrewfi]

Let me also give my very accurate tips to those newbies of online dating.

If a woman tells you, from the very beginning of communication, that:

• she is God-fearing.
• she is very serious at finding a foreign husband
• she is not playing game

Then, s/he is a Scammer.  Full Stop.

What makes you think that all women who are religious or serious about finding a foreign husband are scammers?

Could it be that fantasies of this type are rendering your chances of attaining your goal an impossibility?

Logically, a woman who is not willing to marry a foreign bloke is unlikely to be a woman open to a relationship with you. Logically, are you not looking for a woman who is serious about finding a life partner?

Methinks a little bit of self-contemplation might be needed here.

[LoyalMan]

andrewfi,
Please add a Time variable to my opinion, ok? 

[andrewfi]

andrewfi,
Please add a Time variable to my opinion, ok? 

What do you mean?

Are you now telling us something else to support your crazed delusions? If so, please share. I am interested to know just how it is that a woman who is serious about finding a husband is inevitably a scammer. I am sure that I am not alone in being curious about this.

[Manny]

Let me also give my very accurate tips to those newbies of online dating.

If a woman tells you, from the very beginning of communication, that:

• she is God-fearing.
• she is very serious at finding a foreign husband
• she is not playing game

Then, s/he is a Scammer.  Full Stop.

Nonsense.

[Steveboy]

Let me also give my very accurate tips to those newbies of online dating.

If a woman tells you, from the very beginning of communication, that:

• she is God-fearing.
• she is very serious at finding a foreign husband
• she is not playing game

Then, s/he is a Scammer.  Full Stop.




she is God-fearing. Very few women ever use that term BUT every African scammer who is out to scam the women say this..
she is very serious at finding a foreign husband..Very few women ever say and it is generally put in the women mouth by the guy saying "You are serious in your search for a foreign husband" Often used by insecure men..
she is not playing game.. Again no women would say this unless a guy puts the words in her mouth again with some thing like "You are serious aren't you?" Again often used by insecure men.. petrified of being scammed!

[LoyalMan]

Let me elaborate more psychology about my conjecture.


If a man/woman tells you, from the "very beginning" of communication, that:

• I am God fearing. I never do bad thing.  Therefore, "I will not cheat you money."
• I am very serious in finding a foreign husband. Therefore, "I am not a Scammer."
• I am not playing game. Therefore, "I am not a Scammer."

S/he actually emphasizes the hidden parts of her sentence.


And yes, "I am God fearing" is a signature of African scammers.

[Steveboy]

Let me elaborate more psychology about my conjecture.


If a man/woman tells you, from the "very beginning" of communication, that:

• I am God fearing. I never do bad thing.  Therefore, "I will not cheat you money."
• I am very serious in finding a foreign husband. Therefore, "I am not a Scammer."
• I am not playing game. Therefore, "I am not a Scammer."

S/he actually emphasizes the hidden parts of her sentence.


And yes, "I am God fearing" is a signature of African scammers.

I think when you meet any women on a first date you would never ask such questions any way.. I cannot imagine asking any women "Are you serious " You should figure this out with common sense and natural instincts ..

[LoyalMan]

Steveboy,
I have never mentioned that I asked such questions!

I never ask or test a person.  I simply observe.   

[LoyalMan]

Many guys may conclude that free dating site or monthly subscription site are better choice.

However, they suffer from big drawback.

There are many cheating wives profiles, fake profiles, women claiming false age and false marital status, false number of kids, fake photos, photos taken when they were young, etc.

Usually, women will minus their real age by 10 to 20 on such a dating site, hide their kids.  Also, the probability of meeting a strategic scammer (long term scammer) is higher than pay-per-chat site.

I conclude that men actually take no advantage on these kind of sites.


I do not recommend any so as to avoid interest conflict.

[Steveboy]

Many guys may conclude that free dating site or monthly subscription site are better choice.

However, they suffer from big drawback.

There are many cheating wives profiles, fake profiles, women claiming false age and false marital status, false number of kids, fake photos, photos taken when they were young, etc.

Usually, women will minus their real age by 10 to 20 on such a dating site, hide their kids.  Also, the probability of meeting a strategic scammer (long term scammer) is higher than pay-per-chat site.

I conclude that men actually take no advantage on these kind of sites.


I do not recommend any so as to avoid interest conflict.

Are you actually normal ?

Usually, women will minus their real age by 10 to 20 on such a dating site,  I think you will find it is totally the other way around on nearly all dating sites.. men will lower they age by 10/20 years even put photos up from 40 years ago..

Cheating wives?? I suggest you try signing up as a women.. it is usually free and see how you get on with the guys..

Then come back and tell us all about the cheating housewives 

[Guile]

Loyalman you haven't even been to Russia. Stop talking about Russian women and dating. You have no idea...lei pok gaaii jo mut yei ah.

[msmoby]

Loyalman

I have not met with any FSUW who has lied about her age .... and I have met 4 in UA, 1 in Cyprus, 2 in BY and 5 in Russia over 16 years

For sure, a lot might take of a year or two - some DO try to lose a decade - but they always sent an honest one - when engaging away from the site and I never met with a lady without knowing she was going to look at least as good as the photo - often better in real life.

[Gregory Watson]

I still wonder why you guys can find girls locally? Were you might meet a girl were you can see everyday and so least chance of being a cheated.

Some of us are weird. Some of us are crazy. Some of us are losers. Some of use are all three and we hope to find a woman who doesn't understand us for who we are because local girls can quickly identify us and as a result, we'd be lonely for the rest of our lives. Some of us are winners but we have a different reason for seeking a woman overseas.

I've never had a problem dating local women. I just find Slavic women are the most beautiful in the world. I prefer them and fortunately there are tens of thousands of Slavic women around where I live and I've dated dozens of them. Welcome to the forum.

Thats a very good reply to that! Have been with a great Russian woman for the past 5 years now. Introduced to us by a mutual friend whom I ironically met on a dating site. Although the relationship was certainly made easier since I spend most of my time here! I know not everyone has such a luxury. And, I was in a 2 year relationship with a Czech girl back in the mid-late 00's. It was the long distance thing that ultimately doomed it, though. I was in my mid 20's and just wasn't ready to move and moving wasn't an option for her at the moment. She had no economic reason to move, anyway, as she comes from a relatively wealthy family (she even works for her father's company). A rarity among western/slavic couples, unless the slavic girl is an expat living somewhere like London or L.A. But yeah, I agree, Slavic women are the most beautiful. But their personalities stand out even more. Have had 1 other slavic girlfriend (in Ukraine) and more dates than I can count. But, like back home, I struck out much more than I made a home run! And dealt with scams and lived to learn..

I agree guys! I also just love Slavic women, despite all this scam on dating sites. I think you can still find a great woman there, but you have to be realistic. If you are 50+, it's risky and silly to get close with a 20 y.o. girl. Also, it's absolutely perfect recommendation  not to send money to anyone before you meet them!  I had several girlfriends from Ukraine and I supported them financially, but I started  doing it only after we met face to face.

[Manny]

I had several girlfriends from Ukraine and I supported them financially,

Why?

BTW, welcome.