Dating & Marriage With Women From Russia, Ukraine, Belarus & FSU > Ask a Russian Speaking Lady - Спроси у русской леди
Sour grapes or basis in reality?
FreeRabbit:
I was on a totally unrelated search, but you can't search anything with the words "Russia" or "Ukraine" without seeing "scam" in the results.
I'm just wondering about some sites I skimmed through, from which I didn't take any exact quotes.....but many men are complaining that they married this nice, sweet woman from an FSU country who totally changed after the first month. There are stories of them becoming distant, celibate, and focusing on learning English and getting driver licenses before surprising these men by demanding divorce and trying to take them for all they're worth in court!
I should probably disregard "taking them for all they're worth in court" because that's going to happen in typical American divorce anyway.
The men are contending this, in various different "complaint" sites on the internet: that Russian women are the world's best scammers, and don't even view what they do as wrong because it's part of their personalities and they think it's standard operating procedure for getting what they want in life, never mind the men's feelings or disrupted lives. Stories of cheating through 9 years of marriage and 2 kids, of stealing money, just every diabolical thing you can think of.
Now, I'm wondering a couple things...first, what is with some of these sites denouncing Russian women, then advertising a recommendation by the owner of the page: "Use Elena's Models instead!" or something like that...
And, giving the benefit of the doubt to the accused, I don't know if these men were total asses to their imported brides or not! Aside from that possibility, is there any grain of truth that can be exaggerated or otherwise interpreted in a way that would make these stories believable to a Russian or Ukrainian woman who reads them??
FreeRabbit:
Oh, I forgot....another reason I'm kind of interested in knowing about this:
My uncle married a woman who he brought over from Ukraine with her teenage daughter about 10 years ago. I don't know why it took this long, but she finally became an American citizen last year (while already married?? I don't get that.)
Then suddenly, without any prior comments about the marriage as indicators, he is single again. I asked him what the hell happened, and he said: she became an American citizen, and had already met the rich guy she was really looking for and divorced me to be with him.
I think my uncle is a great guy, nicest of all the men in my family, actually....but I never lived with him. And the kind, sweet and loveable American woman he was married to when I was a kid divorced him too.
Muzh_1:
My comment on your first post is that these guys really bought hook, line and sinker the industry's claim of virginal damsels in distress. After they were settled, probably the husband demanded some slave work and she responded with a f**k you. It happens a lot.
My response to your second post is that I'm sorry to hear about what happened to your uncle. Proof again that the virginal damsels in distress are a myth.
Tell you what. My wife became an American citizen after five, or was it six years being here. I never asked her if she wanted become one. SHE did ask me if I wanted her to do that. I said to her that was a very personal choice and I would support her. I guess what helped is that I told her she can still claim to be a Ukrainian citizen after the ceremony. The only time she will stop being a Ukrainian citizen is by going to the Embassy/Consulate and renounce her UA citizenship in front of a consul. That was 5 or 6 years ago and she is still here with me.
shakespear:
It ain't rocket science. It all boils down to the woman you select and how you select her.
If you are an average man with average income and an average personality and believe fashion-model chicks, 20+ years your junior in Ukraine who are completely out of your league appearance wise are just dying to meet and marry you - then you will probably end up writing your sad story and adding it with the others you listed above.
If you are clever enough and display the patience needed to look inside the pretty face and model figure to find what is REALLY inside that person, your chances of success will be increased tenfold.
I'll make this statement and know beforehand it will be controversial. If any man will show me a series of 6 full body length pictures (all in different settings clearly showing both faces) of he of his FSU girlfriend together, I can predict with 80% accurancy if your marriage will be a success. I'm serious here. I'm guessing many of "the elders" on RUA would back me in this claim.
FreeRabbit:
--- Quote from: Muzh_1 on March 27, 2012, 12:24:16 PM ---My comment on your first post is that these guys really bought hook, line and sinker the industry's claim of virginal damsels in distress. After they were settled, probably the husband demanded some slave work and she responded with a f**k you. It happens a lot.
--- End quote ---
So this is why so many times in exchanges with these girls, the question has come up, "Do you think man should be master of the house?" That's why they all want to know that!
--- Quote from: Muzh_1 on March 27, 2012, 12:24:16 PM ---My wife became an American citizen after five, or was it six years being here. I never asked her if she wanted become one.
--- End quote ---
I had no idea! I thought marrying an American citizen made the woman a citizen automatically. Well, I always thought my uncle was the nicest of guys but I never lived with him or saw his interaction with either wife so....I just hope you're treating yours well!
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