finding out whom she really is...

[thought4mass]

 Sharon,
Hi! If you read my story carefully you'll see info that her mother petitioned her to come to the U.S. I had nothing to do with that. This petition was already submitted way before i met her. When she was 13y/o i think. At this point i dont know if or what was faked or not. She had no need to scam other then maybe feeling secure in knowing she had someone other than mother and brother waiting for her here in U.S. As i said in stroy they do not have greatest relationship.

[sharonhaber00]

John

I've noticed she didn't need you for emigration. Though it was more important to notice this:

it is nearly impossible to fake attraction to a mate that will be convincing enough for a possible husband to proceed with marriage. There are very clear indications if the person is or is not attracted to a potential mate, such as sexual attraction (in the case where a woman fakes attraction, she prefers to have as little sexual communication as possible), personal acceptance (if a woman fakes attraction, she is often irritated with minor things), and body language (if a woman fakes attraction, she tries to "close" herself to the man, by crossing her hands and legs when the two are together, making herself "inaccessible" for him, moving back when he moves towards her, etc). Such cues in a woman's behavior can seldom go unnoticed by a man, even if on the subconscious level, he will have the feeling that "something's not right", and will usually back up from a marriage.

I asked if you've noticed some of the signs who mention in the article. 

[cufflinks]

Time to look at the upside - no child support and no alimony now that she has her own apartment and no defense lawyer for DV claims to fast track a Green Card...

So you dodged several major bullets that could have ruined you life.

Keep this in mind next time you begin your search for FSUW and keep in mind key success factors which is why most successful men limit to a 30+/- yo with skills and typically no more that one child - usually a daughter older than a toddler and not yet a teen that you could possible bond with. 

I dated an ultra hot lady who bought her own salon via working as a rippah at Scores in NYC - could not reconcile this in the future wife and mother of my children so cut it off.  Plus her mercenary tendencies would piss me off.

What sux in this case was her poisoning the kids minds against you - a classic tactic of a woman setting you up for a fall.  Happend to more than a couple of my co workers and friends here with AW as well.

Now you are older and wiser and know what to look out for - as soon as you get the B.S. stories and they do not tell you the truth on questions important to you - best advice is to hit the NEXT button and do not think twice about it.

You seem like a great guy who's heart was in the right place and you deserve the same respect from your woman AW or FSUW or AnyW - the moment you feel disrespected in any way you have to call them on it and set the rules and parameters of your relationship long before any marriage license.  And if they do not get the wake up call immediately then NEXT!

At the end of the day you have the right to demand happiness in a relationship equal to the level of respect you show.  All the best moving forward.

[sharonhaber00]

What sux in this case was her poisoning the kids minds against you - a classic tactic of a woman setting you up for a fall.  Happend to more than a couple of my co workers and friends here with AW as well.

It happened to my uncle who had lived many years in NY, who had been married with Israeli wife for about 20 years. He is underground now. We don't have connection with his children (my cousins).   

[thought4mass]

For Sharon:
You know thats what makes me very puzzled. She always was intimate with me until the last 2 months then those signs and more started showing. Not the pulling away but things like degrading, less patience talking, nothing i do or say seemed good enough or interesting for her. She systimatically destroyed my relationship with her children by doing these things in front of them. To ensure they were on her side for our break up as they really started liking me.

[sharonhaber00]

It sounds like split personality. Personal disorder. She is sick, whether she planed it from the beginning or not, she has sick mind. You shouldn't put your head in sick bed.
Good riddance!   

[Slumba]

You dodged a bullet t4m!

As far as plans, some people who are damaged, don't have plans, they just continue doing what they do, repeating the same pattern of failed relationships time after time. 

[TomT]

... systematically... [spelling corrected]

This is the key word. You are describing classical sociopathy.

[thought4mass]

Recently, I have had the urge to get some kind of revenge. I dont think a woman should be allowed to make drastic changes and descisions, and allow you into her childrens lives and then treat you the way i was treated. Maybe someone needs to give her a valuable lesson. I also know  some men do these things regularly to women. But i never set out to do or harm anyone.. Guess best to quell down the urge and move on. But revenge does sound interesting.. John

[AvHdB]

Maybe John it is time to go to Mass.

One of the more difficult things in life is to forgive and move on, hopefully a bit wiser.

[welder]

Recently, I have had the urge to get some kind of revenge. I dont think a woman should be allowed to make drastic changes and descisions, and allow you into her childrens lives and then treat you the way i was treated. Maybe someone needs to give her a valuable lesson. I also know  some men do these things regularly to women. But i never set out to do or harm anyone.. Guess best to quell down the urge and move on. But revenge does sound interesting.. John

Time to move on and heal.  Getting stuck in the "gotta get even" mindset only holds you back from moving on.

[JayH]

John- what goes around comes around. Works out remarkably well in life and the best part-- you only have to leave them to it.Going forward in a positive way has a remarkable affect in helping yourself-- and that is what matters now.

[TomT]

Get some legal advice first...

[cufflinks]

NYC is a magnet for single women including many Russian expats - chalk up this experience to being learn-able moment - get on Mamba.ru, match.com and POF and yes perhaps seeking arrangement and search NYC - post honest profiles of you who you are and exactly what you are looking for - as you are gainfully employed and a decent guy you will be back in action with someone who truly does care about you and does not come up with a bunch of stories, or who uses her kids to manipulate and torment you and who does NOT have ulterior motives - remember that the moment a woman disrespects you it is a massive red flag and she is best nexted because you really can not fix broken people.

Onward and Upward or as our fearless leader might say Forward Ho!

[Slumba]

Onward and Upward or as our fearless leader might say Forward Ho!

I think Michelle Obama would slap him if he said that ...