Russian, Ukrainian & FSU Information & Manosphere Discussion Forums
Dating & Marriage With Women From Russia, Ukraine, Belarus & FSU => Ask a Russian Speaking Lady - Спроси у русской леди => Topic started by: FredHill on September 23, 2014, 01:01:02 AM
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
-
I think the word 'hate' may not mean quite what you think it does.
But if by 'some' you mean that there are mentally ill people, some of whom are women who are very anti social then, well, of course they exist, but they are mentally ill.
If you are one of the people you define as being good, kind, decent and you keep meeting mentally ill people then you might want to change your line of work or your lifestyle - or re-examine your self assessment.
Normal people tend to NOT hate other people. Normal people are not openly hostile toward other people.
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
I think you will find it a very rare thing indeed that a woman actually hates "good, kind, decent men".
If you're finding that women are dissing you in particular, perhaps they see something in you that you haven't seen yourself.
Edit: lol, I see Andrew an I think likewise...
-
I think he meant women always attract to "bad image" men. "Good guys always come last" the old saying
-
I think he meant women always attract to "bad image" men. "Good guys always come last" the old saying
Well, that's not what he wrote and it is not a true statement either. ;)
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
When I read the thread subject, my initial thought was that there is something wrong with the question. However, when I read the words saying that some women are openly hostile towards the obviously good men, I'thought that you mean something particular.
Before I recommend you to read the theory about the so called alpha and omega males, would you be so kind to give a few examples of such behavior of female hostility towards the good men?
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
Perhaps, a second glance makes it even worse? :8)
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
Please activate the imagination. Dating - it's shopping. Online Dating - shop. Potential bride should try all new things for themselves. How do you think the woman immediately make a choice? :knit:
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
I'm not a Russian woman, but I think I can offer some useful insight here...
Inner qualities come out over time. I have to assume this is a specific experience you're having. Based on your other posts I'm going to read into the entire scenario to offer what insight I can.
1. It's a numbers game - start canvasing and find someone that likes your outer looks well enough to invest the time to learn your outer qualities. This comes out with shared experiences. So the only way she'll get to know them is if you're spending enough time with her...in person.
2. Odds are better with a tighter age bracket. Not to say you can't find a 25 y/o hottie who finds you adorable. Just understand that percentage-wise you may have to do a LOT more canvassing. Less so with women closer to your age. Some people get on the whole "date close to your looks" thing too. Confidence is a lot of what makes a man attractive, so I don't read as much into that. Which brings me to point #3.
3. Women love confidence, especially FSUW. If you don't exhibit that quality, good luck. She'll wonder how you will provide for her, protect her and not let her run all over you. You don't have to be an asshole, but you do have to be a leader (in some regards at least.)
And if you don't like those answers...well perhaps you should cast a wider net to other parts of the world as well. :) Regardless, find what works for YOU and where the odds are best for your strengths and work from there.
Luck!
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
Why is such a man interested in women who are openly hostile to him? Why does he keep barking up the wrong tree? Is he looking only at outer beauty and ignoring those quality women in his midst who may not package themselves as proficiently? Is his apparent angst over this state of affairs a case of arrested development? Or is he a masochist?
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
The real question should be why would such a man worry about *some* women?
Those women likely don't hate that type of man, they may simply not be interested romantically- that's a huge difference.
Even at that, the *some* would seem a minority, so the majority of the female population would neither hate that type, nor avoid them for romance.
Such a man has precious little to worry about if his interests and expectations are realistic.
(meaning if he seeks women in the same socio/economic status, and relative attractiveness)
-
I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
FH, some women are hardwired to pursue the bad boys. They say they want a nice
guy but then they bed the bad boys. Forget about those women, if a woman wants
to reform bad boys let her go do it and dump her like overly ripe fish guts. Don't try
to reform girls who like bad boys they are like crack heads, they lie their asses off
and go back to them again and again. Dump them and never look back. Do NOT
recycle girls.
Fortunately most FSUW have met enough bad boys to know they can't be reformed.
If an FSUW is over 28 she has met enough bad boys to have them out of her system
for good.
Udachi!
Bill
-
The real question should be why would such a man worry about *some* women?
:thumbsup:
There are plenty of women who are looking for nice guys.
-
I'm not a Russian woman, but I think I can offer some useful insight here...
Inner qualities come out over time. I have to assume this is a specific experience you're having. Based on your other posts I'm going to read into the entire scenario to offer what insight I can.
1. It's a numbers game - start canvasing and find someone that likes your outer looks well enough to invest the time to learn your [inner] outer qualities. This comes out with shared experiences. So the only way she'll get to know them is if you're spending enough time with her...in person.
2. Odds are better with a tighter age bracket. Not to say you can't find a 25 y/o hottie who finds you adorable. Just understand that percentage-wise you may have to do a LOT more canvassing. Less so with women closer to your age. Some people get on the whole "date close to your looks" thing too. Confidence is a lot of what makes a man attractive, so I don't read as much into that. Which brings me to point #3.
3. Women love confidence, especially FSUW. If you don't exhibit that quality, good luck. She'll wonder how you will provide for her, protect her and not let her run all over you. You don't have to be an asshole, but you do have to be a leader (in some regards at least.)
And if you don't like those answers...well perhaps you should cast a wider net to other parts of the world as well. :) Regardless, find what works for YOU and where the odds are best for your strengths and work from there.
Luck!
-
I'm not talking about fawning, obsequious wimps, or manipulative scumbags who pretend to be nice. I'm talking about honest, down-to-earth guys who treat everybody with kindness and respect. The kind of man who'd stop to comfort a crying child or help an old lady onto a train. Why are some women openly hostile towards this type of male, dismissing them as weak, spineless and inferior? I mean, they may not be drop-dead handsome, but surely their innate qualities make them worth a second glance --
something about your posts is askew to me fred
maybe some self exploration would be wise ?
SX
-
Why is such a man interested in women who are openly hostile to him? Why does he keep barking up the wrong tree?
He isn't actively seeking hostile women. Being friendly and sociable by nature, he bumps into dozens of people on a daily basis. The law of averages predicts at least some of them will be female.
At this point, he has no idea that they view him with contempt, as he hasn't done anything to deserve it.
The hostility only becomes apparent when a totally harmless comment such as "Would you like a cup of coffee?" is answered with "Don't f---ing waste my time, you pathetic loser!"
Is he looking only at outer beauty and ignoring those quality women in his midst who may not package themselves as proficiently?
No, he's just being friendly, the same way he is with everybody. He doesn't judge by appearances, and he often invites his acquaintances out for lunch, dinner or drinks, regardless of their looks.
Is his apparent angst over this state of affairs a case of arrested development? Or is he a masochist?
There is no angst involved, as he doesn't hold grudges. His tolerant, impartial nature suggests a high degree of maturity. As stated above, he isn't actively seeking out hostile women, so he clearly isn't a masochist.
-
I don't know, someone talking in the third person all the time when he's referring to himself is enough to freak anyone out. Perhaps if you didn't, you'd actually get a date.
-
Fred, what is your advice to the person to who you are referring?
-
Fred, what is your advice to the person to who you are referring?
I have no desire to offer advice to anybody. I'm simply curious to know why otherwise rational women would display a completely irrational animosity towards men who've done nothing to harm them.
-
I don't know, someone talking in the third person all the time when he's referring to himself is enough to freak anyone out. Perhaps if you didn't, you'd actually get a date.
Well- one would do that if they had adopted a new forum persona and saw their creation as real other person !!
Seriously-- how much forum space has been consumed with his inane propositions already .
-
If you have no desire to help this other person then why on earth ask for guidance into his issue? Seems like a terrible waste of time and more than a little selfish.
If the person is actually you then why not refer to yourself?
-
If you have no desire to help this other person then why on earth ask for guidance into his issue?
I have not requested guidance, Andrew. I have simply asked for information, prompted by an interest in the contradictions of human relationships.
Seriously-- how much forum space has been consumed with his inane propositions already .
The psychologically verified inanities of interpersonal relationships are quite fascinating, and have been the subject of considerable scientific research. Numerous studies of the phenomena are currently available, you can easily look them up online if you have the time or inclination to do so.
-
I have no desire to offer advice to anybody. I'm simply curious to know why otherwise rational women would display a completely irrational animosity towards men who've done nothing to harm them.
Men have so far developed 124 various theories about women. Unfortunately they
are all wrong. Women either don't know what they want or won't truthfully say.
Asking especially a Western Woman what she wants is only slightly more productive
than asking a Chinese speaking parrot what it wants. If the WW/Parrot tells you,
you wouldn't understand anyway.
The hostility only becomes apparent when a totally harmless comment such as "Would you like a cup of coffee?" is answered with "Don't f---ing waste my time, you pathetic loser!"
This guy you are describing is unable to read any signals that women send out.
He should study, body language and work more at social interaction. Communication
is a two way street and over 80% is nonverbal. This guy needs to learn and study
nonverbal communication. He has nearly zero empathy, or he would know that the
girl had less than zero interest in him.
He should totally avoid FSUW unless he has a wingman guiding him every step of
the way.
FSUW are not for entry level daters. This guy is like a 14 year old boy who just figured
out that he likes girls.
Udachi!
Bill
-
Fred, you may have a poor understanding of English that is confusing you. If we share information with you then by doing so we are providing guidance - guiding you toward insight or a solution by providing information that adds to your knowledge.
Be honest with us. Why do you insist on trying to claim that you are asking questions about 3rd parties when it is clearly about you?
Why on earth would you ask about something that happened to a friend of yours and then claim that you'd not pass on your new knowledge. It is hard to imagine a normally socialised person who could be so selfish.
-
Udachi!
Главное - чтобы костюмчик сидел! :-*
-
Why on earth would you ask about something that happened to a friend of yours and then claim that you'd not pass on your new knowledge.
Pardon me Andrew, where in this thread have I stated that I'm talking about a friend?
-
At this point, he has no idea that they view him with contempt, as he hasn't done anything to deserve it.
The hostility only becomes apparent when a totally harmless comment such as "Would you like a cup of coffee?" is answered with "Don't f---ing waste my time, you pathetic loser!"
....
There is no angst involved, as he doesn't hold grudges. His tolerant, impartial nature suggests a high degree of maturity. As stated above, he isn't actively seeking out hostile women, so he clearly isn't a masochist.
Sorry Fred, just not buying it as a normal thing for the average nice guy to run into.
The average woman would not have that reaction,nor would she hold an average nice guy in contempt, so it is not going to be a common occurrence.
Could it happen? Sure, that doesn't mean its common place for disinterested women to respond to such a mild question ,with that kind of hostility.
You are asking FSU women a general question that doesn't apply to the general population there,or anywhere else.
So what type of answer are you expecting?
the women to say:
1. that in general they are anti social and hostile ?
2. that in general they do not react that way, even though you've posed a closed ended question already assuming they do?
Overall most of your questions seem the musings of someone who was so overly sensitive that some relatively small out of place reaction by a random odd individual, shaped their entire thinking of how others generally feel and interact.
-
it is not going to be a common occurrence.
Nowhere in this thread have I claimed that this a common occurrence.
...so what type of answer are you expecting?
Truthful, incisive and thought-provoking.
-
I recommend some "red pill" sites such as Heartiste.wordpress.com , etc. Site is not always written in a polite tone.
My guess: you are a nerd and dress poorly.
-
Fred, you keep referring to yourself in the 3rd person or as an abstract and have specifically told us that you were asking on behalf of some other person. I do not regard each thread you post as being a different and separate entity they are all representations of you, part of yourself.
Each of your questions tells us about you. That you insist upon treating yourself as some kind of cypher suggests that there is something going on with you that is not normal and that if you are a genuine person and not a sock puppet that you are facing some kind of issue or crisis in your personal life. But then what do I know, I ain't a psychoanalyst, but you are, for sure, a touch odd.
-
you ... have specifically told us that you were asking on behalf of some other person.
No, I haven't, Andrew. I've posted hypothetical situations based on behavior I've observed from an impartial perspective.
-
Why is such a man interested in women who are openly hostile to him? Why does he keep barking up the wrong tree?
He isn't actively seeking hostile women. Being friendly and sociable by nature, he bumps into dozens of people on a daily basis. The law of averages predicts at least some of them will be female.
At this point, he has no idea that they view him with contempt, as he hasn't done anything to deserve it.
The hostility only becomes apparent when a totally harmless comment such as "Would you like a cup of coffee?" is answered with "Don't f---ing waste my time, you pathetic loser!"
Is he looking only at outer beauty and ignoring those quality women in his midst who may not package themselves as proficiently?
No, he's just being friendly, the same way he is with everybody. He doesn't judge by appearances, and he often invites his acquaintances out for lunch, dinner or drinks, regardless of their looks.
Is his apparent angst over this state of affairs a case of arrested development? Or is he a masochist?
There is no angst involved, as he doesn't hold grudges. His tolerant, impartial nature suggests a high degree of maturity. As stated above, he isn't actively seeking out hostile women, so he clearly isn't a masochist.
Well, Fred, assuming that it is someone else you are talking about, then you cannot possibly know all the details... Some of those "kind" and "giving" and "generous" guys could be quite annoying, and being psychopaths that they are, they cannot understand how creepy their "harmless" behavior is. Though they might look normal and mimic genuine emotions to an "impartial observer".
Hence stalking laws. :knit:
-
Well, Fred, assuming that it is someone else you are talking about, then you cannot possibly know all the details... Some of those "kind" and "giving" and "generous" guys could be quite annoying, and being psychopaths that they are, they cannot understand how creepy their "harmless" behavior is. Though they might look normal and mimic genuine emotions to an "impartial observer".
Hence stalking laws. :knit:
By the same token, Fashionista, we have no reason to assume that the hypothetical male is psychopathic or mimicking genuine emotions. In real life, people are innocent until proven guilty. We don't normally view every stranger as a potential stalker - nor should we, especially if their behaviour gives us no reason to fear them. Do you honestly believe we should treat every new person we meet with suspicion and mistrust?
-
Well, Fred, assuming that it is someone else you are talking about, then you cannot possibly know all the details... Some of those "kind" and "giving" and "generous" guys could be quite annoying, and being psychopaths that they are, they cannot understand how creepy their "harmless" behavior is. Though they might look normal and mimic genuine emotions to an "impartial observer".
Hence stalking laws. :knit:
By the same token, Fashionista, we have no reason to assume that the hypothetical male is psychopathic or mimicking genuine emotions. In real life, people are innocent until proven guilty. We don't normally view every stranger as a potential stalker - nor should we, especially if their behaviour gives us no reason to fear them. Do you honestly believe we should treat every new person we meet with suspicion and mistrust?
By the same token you cannot conclude that the girl you talked about was acting out of some general "hate towards all good, kind and decent men". If you don't know the circumstances, you don't know the circumstances, period. That's it, it goes both ways, do you honestly believe you should treat every woman as a potential irrational hater of good, kind, decent man? You don't know what transpired. No reason for "forum science"
-
In real life, people are innocent until proven guilty.
I have met angry women like you described. They look angry, the have an angry
look about them and are hostile in both manner and appearance. I've never seen
any reason to approach such a damaged person and let them pass their seething
anger on to me.
Look at people, they are always communicating even when they don't say a word.
If you think that it's a good idea to approach them and ask them for coffee then
you might get rebuffed in the angry way that you have described. I know people
who say "I treat everybody the same." are crazy. I don't, I treat everybody differently.
I don't talk quietly to a loud person, I don't talk loudly to a quiet person. I don't
speak fast to a slow talker. I look, I listen and observe the person whom I might
interact with. If I see hostile, or crazy, or lunatic, or extreme sadness, etc I give
them a wide berth. If you choose to be either nonobservant or to ignore the signs
then you will get what you get.
Udachi!
Bill
-
it is not going to be a common occurrence.
Nowhere in this thread have I claimed that this a common occurrence.
...so what type of answer are you expecting?
Truthful, incisive and thought-provoking.
If its not really common then , and is a random incident,or small number of incidents in the general context of things, looking for *general* insight seems misplaced,
as each random incident would have any number of various reasons behind it.
The female involved could simply be a quite hostile person, or have just found out her dog died, her husband cheated on her, she has a serious illness.. just got over a stalker incident..etc etc.
So looking for specific or general answers to an uncommon scenario seems futile, even more so if it is a general question applied to some specific culture.
-
Well, Fred, assuming that it is someone else you are talking about, then you cannot possibly know all the details... Some of those "kind" and "giving" and "generous" guys could be quite annoying, and being psychopaths that they are, they cannot understand how creepy their "harmless" behavior is. Though they might look normal and mimic genuine emotions to an "impartial observer".
Hence stalking laws. :knit:
By the same token, Fashionista, we have no reason to assume that the hypothetical male is psychopathic or mimicking genuine emotions. In real life, people are innocent until proven guilty. We don't normally view every stranger as a potential stalker - nor should we, especially if their behaviour gives us no reason to fear them. Do you honestly believe we should treat every new person we meet with suspicion and mistrust?
By the same token you cannot conclude that the girl you talked about was acting out of some general "hate towards all good, kind and decent men". If you don't know the circumstances, you don't know the circumstances, period. That's it, it goes both ways, do you honestly believe you should treat every woman as a potential irrational hater of good, kind, decent man? You don't know what transpired. No reason for "forum science"
That was very well played; I couldn't have done better myself.
This discussion is unproductive and won't improve if key players continue to hide behind the hypothetical.
-
If your not asking, to improve yourself, or help a friend.
Then you need a new hobby, your looking for answer that can't be found :)
-
Do you honestly believe you should treat every woman as a potential irrational hater of good, kind, decent man?
I wasn't referring to all women, Fashionista. If you check the title of the thread, you'll see I was referring to some.
-
The female involved could simply be a quite hostile person, or have just found out her dog died, her husband cheated on her, she has a serious illness.. just got over a stalker incident..etc etc.
Do you believe its justified for a person to take out their frustrations on a complete stranger or recent acquaintance, AJ? For example: if we reverse the genders, would it be OK for a man to call a woman he barely knows as a "lying slut" because his marriage is going through a rough patch?
-
Do you honestly believe you should treat every woman as a potential irrational hater of good, kind, decent man?
I wasn't referring to all women, Fashionista. If you check the title of the thread, you'll see I was referring to some.
Why do some people lie?
Why do some people kill?
Why do some people become addicted to drugs?
Why do men cheat?
why do women cheat?
Infinit amount of questions, as there are answers
To give an answer to any of your questions.
they have to be case specific.
-
I wasn't referring to all women, Fashionista. If you check the title of the thread, you'll see I was referring to some.
There are some women who hear voices and kill their kids and themselves.
Why do they do that? Why do some women choose cannibalism? Why do some
women prefer women sexually to men? Why do some women shave their heads?
Why do some women have unequal sized breasts? why do some women have
difficulty reading maps? why do dogs wag their tails?
-
Why do some people ...........
Looks like you beat me to my point
-
Why do some people ...........
Looks like you beat me to my point
LOL, ya why do dogs chase their tails. Same as some people ask questions that can't be answered.
going in circles amuses them :)
-
The female involved could simply be a quite hostile person, or have just found out her dog died, her husband cheated on her, she has a serious illness.. just got over a stalker incident..etc etc.
Do you believe its justified for a person to take out their frustrations on a complete stranger or recent acquaintance, AJ? For example: if we reverse the genders, would it be OK for a man to call a woman he barely knows as a "lying slut" because his marriage is going through a rough patch?
I never said it was justified, that wasn't part of your initial query.You seemed to be looking for reasons why someone might behave in this fashion, justified or not there are many reasons, and yes as you just pointed out those reasons and odd behavior extend to either gender.
-
Who gives a damn why some women have an adverse reaction to "good, kind, decent men?" The men should just walk away and bestow their good, kind, decent selves on women who don't retch at the sight of them.
-
Who gives a damn why some women have an adverse reaction to "good, kind, decent men?" The men should just walk away bestow their good, kind, decent selves on women who don't retch at the sight of them.
Damn T2 your Red Pill reaction to this trolling post is quite impressive - looks like taking an ethnic Russian wife has drastically increased your natural testosterone levels - good on you and another solid reason to take an ethnic Russian wife!