Divorcing my RW wife: from '2003

[Maxx]

I was asked to repost my thread of July of '2003. After I wrote this I spent the time, effort and money to figure out the details of why certain things happened the way they did. I went though quite a effort to find out the truth of what happened after this thread was written. The treachery I discovered shocked me.

This "wound" for me at that time was locked in August of '2004 and sank out of sight. It got over 21,000 hits before it vanished. I have been told it scared more than a few guys into being more cautious. Sad for me to say is it emboldened a few guys as well. I remember something Facetrock wrote: "I read Maxx's story and I wouldn't have fallen for the things he did so I figure I am safe". That is NOT the reaction I hope this story will get.     

What I plan doing is to take a portion of what I wrote below and give you the details of what really was going on at the time. Then do the same to the next portion on another day.

Maxx

     

Divorcing my RW wife
Hello All:

These last months have eaten me alive. I wake every morning depressed and have little energy to carry on with my life. All of this started when my wife (K3) came. I hope by posting this story I can release all of this from inside me. I ask two things, please do not move this story to the Scam section as it belongs here (Married) and not with the usual and please go easy on me folks.

In Russia my wife was warm, affectionate and most of all kind. She would say to me “How is my honey?” and “You are my kind (man)”. I looked forward to the time when she would come to me in America. While I waited I would think of her and imagine our life together. I wanted to raise her son as my own and someday he would help and eventually run my business if that was his choice.

When the embassy sent the packet 4 and the notification letter as to the interview date I was with her there in Russia. At that time she sat me down for a serious talk. She said she was worried about her mother’s living conditions and that she needed to sell the small house the one they were living in the one without hot water. I always for the the last year offered to fix the place up, put in a hot water heater and make it comfortable but it there was always an excuse from her not to.

I told her that instead of selling the house just fix it slowly and have her mother move into the center of the city in an comfortable apartment that I will rent for her. This way she could come to me immediately. Another excuse.

After she got her visa she hesitated about coming to me right away. She wanted to stay for at least a month and a half to help her mother. I was rather hurt that she would not come to me right away but I understood that she needed to take care of her business first.

Then for the next week she seemed to be in no hurry to come and didn’t want to talk about it. Then all of a sudden she wanted to come right away. She said she was worried about the war in Iraq and would not get on a plane after this war started. I assured her there was no problem but she remained unconvinced. So eager to get her here I ordered the tickets for a departing flight from Moscow to JFK airport.

When she arrived I was at the airport to greet her. I expected her to rush to me. Throw her arms around me give me lots of kisses and tell me she loved me and I the same. When she came around the corner she gave me a slight smile, a quick peck of a kiss and shoved the handle of her rolling case into my hand and said “here”. I was shocked. She got into the cab and sat at the far side. When she got back at the hotel she got into bed with her 7 year old son and not me.

The sleeping “arrangement” never changed over the next four nights. When I asked her to start sleeping with me she got violently angry. Her eyes were filed with hate and she told me she would never sleep with me.

Yes there was a coldness about her but sometimes for a moment I would see the woman that I loved back in Russia and I thought “perhaps if I was patient enough… maybe” Then after a month of this I thought maybe I had married a GCG.

So what to do? Off to see lawyers both divorce and immigration and make statements and gather evidence.

From the beginning she pushed me to send money to “Momma” by Western Union. The house was “sold” and the new owners were about to move in and momma needed the extra money for the newer apartment. As the money didn’t come in fast enough for her my wife standing next to me at the Western Union office fumed AND looked worried.

Over that time I was not kept informed about the progress of buying the new apartment. Only by me asking was I told that momma was still living at the “sold” house and this was two months AFTER the house “sold.”

Finally after getting a new divorce lawyer who works much faster and gets things done I filed divorce. I went to my wife one more time to tell her kindly that we can not make each other happy and are getting a divorce. She cried and stood by the door. I put my arms around her. Her arms hung limply by her side and I kissed her softly on her cheek and said “I love you. I will always love you. Goodbye” And I left.

Later that evening I called her and asked her how she was doing. She said her body felt sick and asked me when I would call her again. I said “Tommorow”. I tried calling her every day after that but nothing.

Four days go by and I stop by some mutual Russian friends of ours. I am told that she called her Russian girl friend from her home city and who is now living here and her friend adviced her to check herself into a home for battered women and claim emotional abuse. It was all setup to where to go and this “friend” of mine drove her over there. I was told that “she WILL get her green card and eventually citizenship”. “The organization” she is with “is politically powerful” and “she will get all the help she needs”. Also I was told that I “need not worry about a thing” there will be “no charges against you” (True so far, 10 days and counting) and “she is not your problem” “forget about her” “Go about your business” and “Don’t mention any of this to the BCIS.”

I leave to visit my friend John. I cannot be alone that night. On the way over there driving on some country roads I emotionally break down. I have never cried so hard in my life. My insides felt like they were coming out of my mouth. I am not crying for myself I am crying because I could clearly see that there are people who could do such these things with cold blood cruelty. Me emotionally abusive?! I have been walking on eggshells these months because of fear of my wife and at the advice of my attorneys and besides it is my nature not to want problems. I just want a peaceful happy life with a loving woman.

When I got back to my apartment I noticed the caller ID and storage of names. I noticed the calls from her Russian girl friends and the calls from her friends who brought her to the shelter. I also noticed calls from a Russian man Andrey and an Hispanic man Chavez. Chavez called repeatedly never leaving a message and this was after she left. Finally I spoke to him, a young man from his voice. I told him the my wife was no longer loving here and he said “I see OK” and he has not called since.

Finally the truth has come to me. Yes she was a GCG and her nature is not kind but selfish. But there is more. The money I sent her mother was not to buy a better apartment it was to buy ME. The people back in Russia told my wife to “stop putzing around and get to America and get our money… or else.” I was a mark pure and simple to my wife. She would get her better life, they would get their money and I would be left with my pockets hanging out.

There is more to this story than I can tell you. People in the know I have spoke to, say it is a very common story with women from the FSU. Many come with a Plan and it is executed in a cold blooded manner. If they change personalities (not just a mood change from jet lag and culture shock) and become cold and distant you got a problem. See a attorney right away and make a statement, do not do AOS, file for divorce first and document everything.

Last edited by xxxx on July 24th, 2003 04:42 PM, edited 1 time in total
________________________________________________

Thanks XX as for what I will or have done in regard to the BCIS I choose to avoid comment. Yes I seen red flags. Did I deserve this? Does a woman deserved to be raped if she notices and ingnors potential trouble. Just watch those red flags guys. I think of XXXXXXXX now but unless he has not made it back alive from Latvia I take the cake for being the biggest fool.
________________________________________________

Update
I went to the Sheriff’s ofice to see if the papers had been delivered. They had not because the shelter she is at won’t let that happen or give a living location if she has moved to the deputy. The lady clerk who told me this had a surprize for me. She handed me a restraining order. Aparently my wife has accused me of DV charges as well. The trial is this Wednsday. She wants spousal maintance and health insurance. Strange as it is mixed with a restraining order.

Of course all her charges are untrue and the statements she claims I made sound like something a Cave Man would say Quote: “I haven’t had sex for four days. I am going to kill myself” Then he kept repeating on and on in a rage. “I have not had sex in four days, four days. You have broken my dreams.”

The good news is she has no proof of anything before my filing. She may get some false witnesses though. I will let you guess there Nationality. This is a nightmare for me. To the Godly out there pray for me. I need it. My attorney says we have a 80% probability of winning this one if she doesn’t get some witnesses to lie for her. I would have to say that they will say I neglected her and didn’t give her any money (how about the $3800 sent to her and later her mother in 8 ‘easy’ payments).

I will keep you posted.
_______________________________________________

A stacked deck?
Hello and thank you everyone. Someday this will be over and I can find a peaceful life at last. Fxxxx (a happily married Russian Wife), I appreciate your encouragement and I need all I can get. There is such wonderful Russian women out there, kind, loving and supportive of their husbands. I think you are one of them.

The sickening thing about this situation of mine is how the deck is stacked. We were given no time to prepare a case. My attorney has but two days, tommorow and Tuesday. Restraining order is mixed in with spousal support which is very unusual so says my attorney.

Actually the organization she is with is very familar on how to prosecute these cases. So expect the following:

1) Acting lessons for my wife.
2) Coaching lessons for her son and a written statement from him.
3) An interpeter with a legal background who will do ALL the translation even though my wife speaks good English.
4) A psychologist attesting to her fears and those of her son.
5) Two to four witnesses saying I an neglectful and angry.
6) And extra details that we do not know of until we arrive. Maybe a trip to the hospital for a back “injury” on the day after I told my wife about the divorce.

(she wrote in her affidavit: “He finally pushed me into the couch and I hurt my back. I started crying because my back hurt and Maxx took his hand and lifted my chin up and started laughing saying, “You look beautiful when you cry and I like it when you cry.”")

I shudder to think what will happen next. Maybe she will be wearing a body cast or neck brace?

Hell the defence is part of this scam.

What is sad to me is that I have never had so much as a petty misdeminor in my life, I am squeeky clean, and now this ugly charge.

Even though I have a very good case in the usual circumstances it will be up to the judge’s abilty to “smell a rat” in all this “after the fact evidence”. Plus add in the fact my wife is in a shelter and has no income and I signed the “Affidavit of Support” and she has the sympathy card, it won’t be easy. Besides isn’t it is easy to give away another persons money to help a helpless woman and her child? And to do that the judge must find me “guilty”. So….

My emotions are swinging from confidence to despair but mostly despair. I am preparing my case for my lawyer and at the same time getting my financial records together to prove how much ability I have to support her.

Only God can help me now.

[sharpbws]

The sleeping “arrangement” never changed over the next four nights. When I asked her to start sleeping with me she got violently angry. Her eyes were filed with hate and she told me she would never sleep with me.

That was the "truth-teller" right there.

I was told that “she WILL get her green card and eventually citizenship”. “The organization” she is with “is politically powerful” and “she will get all the help she needs”.

In fact, that information is usually pretty accurate.  Too many guys who find themselves in this situation waste their time and money hoping to get the government to send the scamming succa back to Russia.  Forget it dude, it ain't happening.  Men in this situation are better off focusing all their time, money and effort in getting out of the marriage with as many of their assets intact as possible and getting on with their life.  Leave revenge to the fiction writers.

“Don’t mention any of this to the BCIS.”

Bad mistake.  You should ALWAYS immediately write a letter to the BCIS explaining circumstances, informing them that you are getting a divorce/not getting married and that you are withdrawling your support of her petition.  Make sure you put her "A" number on the letter.  GUARANTEED it will get into her file.

More important, one document that will help her case is a letter from you that you married in "good faith" and the marriage just didn't work out.  If she has such a letter from you her chances of self-petitioning are nearly 100% (baring her commiting a  felony).  You should NEVER give her such a letter without consulting with your attorney first.  It is a powerful bargaining chip to be used in getting a better settlement in the divorce.   

She handed me a restraining order. Aparently my wife has accused me of DV charges as well. The trial is this Wednsday. She wants spousal maintance and health insurance. Strange as it is mixed with a restraining order.

Been there man.  You hell is just getting started.

The sickening thing about this situation of mine is how the deck is stacked. We were given no time to prepare a case. My attorney has but two days, tommorow and Tuesday. Restraining order is mixed in with spousal support which is very unusual so says my attorney.  Even though I have a very good case in the usual circumstances it will be up to the judge’s abilty to “smell a rat” in all this “after the fact evidence”. Plus add in the fact my wife is in a shelter and has no income and I signed the “Affidavit of Support” and she has the sympathy card, it won’t be easy. Besides isn’t it is easy to give away another persons money to help a helpless woman and her child? And to do that the judge must find me “guilty”. So….

No doubt about it, domestic violence is a law where in the legal system, the accused is presumed guilty until proven innocent.  Thanks to effective politicing by the feminists, the whole system is set up to punish the "presumed" scumbag man and protect the "presumed" victim woman, truth be damned.

Our stories are eirily similiar.  Looking forward to reading more.

:-)
Brad

[Maxx]

Been there man.  You(r) hell is just getting started.

I hope sharpbws that you know this was something I posted from 4 years ago. I have since calmed down some 

Maxx

[sharpbws]

I hope sharpbws that you know this was something I posted from 4 years ago. I have since calmed down some 

Yep.  Just empathizing with the story.  Hearing you tell your story brings back my own memories.  So far they almost seem to parallel.  Execpt my now x-wife was not sending money back to Russia - she was just extremely selfish and someone that felt that the world owed her everything she wanted without consequence to others.

:-)
Brad

[pup zemly]

sorry to hear that.
some Russian women treat foreign men like wallets and it seems they marry a country not a person

[DonA]

Maxx,
Even though the story is over 4 years old it is a story that happens everyday still.

GI think Phoenix Az is the GCG Capital of America. I don't know how many I have met ( and I dated a few ). Most of them have ice water in their veins and care only about themselves. Most of them have boyfriends on the side. there is a couple of disco that I think are dedicated to cheating FSUW.

They all know the ropes.
1. get their names on everything
2. Get the husband locked up on DV charges.
3. Clean out the bank accounts while he is in the pokey.
4. Get an order of protection against him and stay in a shelter for a week or so.
5. Then fight to stay in the Home.

I think they have written manual of instructions they follow.

I have never met a bunch of more heartless humans in my life.

DonAz

[Maxx]

  Just a reminder that the war is still going on I got this e-mail several days ago. The big event is tomorrow for "Gus"

Hi Maxx...my wife left me last friday at noon saying she was going to the doctor..she did not arrive back until the next day at approx 2.00pm with the police to remover her belongings...on this past tuesday i received a summons for domestic viloence to appear on june 8th...i never did anything but good for her and the children.....i am terrified, and i was told to contact you for advice...i would greatly appreciate any help or guidance...sincerely, Gus

I'll get an update and post it here.



Maxx

[Maxx]

GI think Phoenix Az is the GCG Capital of America.

Olga is on the far left and Artt is the guy with a mustache and a grim look.



Here is something on the Web about this Russian couple


A true story with real events and real people.
  This about a person who is well known to the American-Russian Community in the Phoenix, Arizona, by the name Olga Cxxxxxa. Who this person really is?
  On one hand, Ms. Olga Cxxxxxa is officially and extensively representing herself to the American-Russian Community as a "higly educated lady", "successful business woman", a General Manager and case worker of a fraudulently formed Charitable non-profit "Xxxxxx Foundation", and a President, Owner, Trustee, Agent... of numerous International shell entities... On the other hand, Olga has been running a fraudulent scheme on the Arizona DES to embezzle financial assistance (DES case # 01076xxx), and methodically and allegedly filing a false affidavits with numerous Arizona Courts in order to avoid paying a court fees, fines and restitutions.

    Yet, Olga claims herself to be a "permanently unemployed and poor", "living on the donations form food-banks and charitable companies...", and she gives the names of entities owned by herself!

    Olga also claims to be a "Medical  Doctor","Pediatrician", "Harassment Specialist", etc. and having a medical education from one the most
prestigious Moscow's Medical Universities. As a fact, Olga Cxxxxxa is the same person who had been well known in mid 90's in Moscow, Russia, as a prostitute by street-name "Ilona". She had close ties to the Chechen Mafia in Moscow, and has had history of arrest for the
variety of illigal "services" provided by Olga.    Furthermore, Olga-Ilona had acted as a "spotter" (navodchitsa)to her Chechen "friends".
She was responsible for spotting and locating wealthy people for further robberies, burglaries or extortion (racketeering) by the Mafia.

    When things for Olga-Ilona in Russia went sore, she moved in Arizona in 1997. Due to get a legal immigration status, Olga concealing her promiscuous and criminal past, engaged in a material scam and, with
unsuspected any fraud a new husband, she settled down in his own home in Phoenix.
    Here Olga soon began with a spree of simple shoplifting - for which was arrested and convicted in year of 1999 (Phoenix Municipal Court, case # 564xxxx). In fear to be deported for the crime she commited, Olga bought her way out by becoming an informant and then a "mistress" of a police detective (*) - infamous for his corruption, and known for use of his position for coercion and intimidation in an extorting personal benefits from Russian immigrants, as well as for fabrications of charges in retaliation against innocent peole who tried to complaint or resist his oppression.

    Before to long, Olga-Ilona, behind the back of her husband who worked as a taxi driver, began a sexual relationship with his ex-friend Mr. Artt Sxxxxh (AKA: Alexander Sxxxsky) notorious scam-artist who is
heavili specializing in fraudulent schemes, thefts and forgeries while acting under pretences to be a "Business Concultant". Olga has quickly joined Artt and has become an assistant in his unlawful, immoral and unethical activities.

    Together they secretly set-up Artt's mother (!!!) on a tax evasion charges (Fed. case: "U.S. vs. Irena Wxxxxxd", California 1999), and while an old lady was hiding from prosecution in the Costa Rica (following on Artt's advise), Olga and Artt cleaned up all her banking accounts, then burglarized her property and tried to sell her home in the California. After that they, literally speaking, robber of all life-saving Artt's step-father (Perry Westmoreland) and in order to make his mouth shut they falsely accused Perry in..."an attempt on Artt's life" sent an old man on the run in the Mexico. At the same time they were using an old man's identities and managed to obtain a number of credit cards under his name and went on the "free shopping" spree...

    When the time came, Olga with her love - Artt turned their greedy eyes ON paid in full personal home and property of Olga's husband - Sergei Lxxxxxw.
   
    With assistance from the same Detective (*), Olga and Artt knowingly fabricated a criminal charge against Sergei by filling a false report accusing him of "an aggravated assault on Olga with a gun". Then they lied in the court room and thus Sergei was convicted and sent in prison for 7 1/2 years with further deportation upon completion of the sentence (AZ Superior Court, case # CR-2001-007xxxx.

    Besides their made-up stories, no other evidence to prove "an assault" has ever been submitted to the court. No gun was ever found, and even the date of this "assault" still remains unknown...

    Once put in prison,Sergei was out of their way, and Olga with Artt manufactured a fake "Deed's" under names of bogus "companies", with forged notary seals and signatures - all supposedly from some "State of Moscow" and "County of Moscow" (?), then using these forgeries they transferred and sold Sergei's home (Maricopa County Recorder's Office files #2001-1061xxxx thru #106xxxx). Next they forged more papers and had "repossessed" and sell Sergei's personal vehicles
(Records of Arizona D.M.V.). Also, Olga with Artt stole the rest of his property (in an excess of $250,000.00) leaving Sergei a "bone-dry"...

    Olga-Ilona lives among us and has continue to use the same patterns of elaborate fraud and deception to set up, frame-up and then rip-off more and more people. For a reasonable amount of money, Olga also
does provide a "concultations" and physical assistance such as: "eye-witness testimonies", "company affidavits" etc. ti the other scum-bags who are willing to follow her criminal and antisocial path. As a result, the number of Olga's and Artt's victims rapidly grows.

REMEMBER: You might be the next to be added to a long list of their victims!

Notice: any one who has had any valuable information regarding Olga's, Artt's and their accomplices' criminal activities - DO NOT BE AFRAID and Please send available materials by E-mail to:russianinternationalvoice@yahoo.com

Edited at request of initial poster to remove names and other identifiers.

[Maxx]

I just got done talking with "Gus". He got through his DV trial well as she didn't show up. The case was dismissed.

"Gus" said he will make his first post here in the next few days and give us some background.



Maxx

[Maxx]

It seems to happen just once a year but I had another Elvira dream. She came back and move in like nothing happened. I was at a loss what to do. She seemed so pleasent and nice. A little part of me wanted to let her stay but the big part of me was trying to figure how to get her to go. I remember asking her questions and getting dodgy answers back. I could feel my anxiety growing to almost a mild panic the whole time. I worried about what she was planning and plotting. At the same time I had a sentimental sadness about her and wished that it could work out. This dream seemed to last for a long time. It was bazar. I awoke depressed.

[grimalkin]

You need to let it go...

[ScottJaySplendid]

I think Maxx finally has.  And the dream is something he cannot control.  But it's a good thing.

[Maxx]

I think Maxx finally has.  And the dream is something he cannot control.  But it's a good thing.

I remember 3 years ago I had a dream about her. I found her in a green dumpster behind some building. I started a thread about it at RWG entitled "Dumpster Diving for RW". I think the dream interpretation was that a dumpster was a fiting place for her.


Maxx

 

[mirror]

Maxx,

sorry to hear it. You were in love and what did you receive? -only bitter unhappiness! 

I say to myself  always "Don't move anywhere until you will be sure".

After this black period of your life you will get a white period very soon.It is a life's progress.

[DonA]

Maxx I often wonder,  how many men must have learned from you how to avoid the same horrors. I’m sure the number is high. You are an invaluable resource for men involved in international dating!!!

I know better than most, how much time, effort, and big $$$$$ you put in to reaching out to guys in the hope they will not go through the same gut wrenching experience. I know it is exorbitant!

You’re a good man Maxx and I admire you!


DonAz

[Maxx]

I am afraid I am not as good as you say I am. A good deal that drives me is payback to the USCIS. Their incentive program for GCGs put me in the position I was/am in. Then they failed to help me when I went to them. That's one of my motivations. They need to be exposed.


Maxx

[DonA]

I see your point clearly. You are on an uphill battle, to say the least.

But the fact is,your story has helped many, and that's what really counts Maxx!! 

Thanks Dude!

Don

[ForgeMaster]

Maxx,
  We can talk about ambiguous stuff like scammer web sites and GRG's till the cows come home, but it is real life stories that make the need for diligence real to newbies.  The excitement is high in the beginning and too many guys throw caution to the wind.  They figure they are strong enough to deal with anything.  You know, the immortal mentality, but then they find themselves caught in the eye of a tornado and getting their hearts ripped out.  Your story is sooo important.  Thanks for tell us about it.

[Maxx]

but it is real life stories that make the need for diligence real to newbies. 

I decided last year the most effective way to show this is with a series of short films on the subject. So I went ahead and got all the equipment for this. I will NOT include my story.

Here is the first story I did of a Ukranian/American man's second marriage. Three trips and being fluent in Russian and knowing the culture did not help him. As he said:
 "I thought I was choosing the right one. I chose the wrongest one! My kids tried to warn me. I told him "If there is one that really loves me, it has to be Yelena!"

Besides showing the consequences of choosing the wrong woman I try and show how the USCIS' rules, policies and handling or lack of handling of  cases of marriage fraud actually encourages this fraud. This intern leads to an artificial increase in abuse claims being made by women and by some foreign men to self petition themselves with false claims.  From this all men who are looking for or have a foreign wife are looked upon in a very negative light. The Tyra Banks show with the spokeswoman of the TJC is a good example of this.

Besides the horror stories I am doing which gets peoples attention, I have filmed a number of happy couples. Also I have filmed Russian and American women who speak out against this fraud. One of my objectives is to show there is kind, decent, fair Russian women out there as well as the other kind. To contrast the two groups. A good example of this is the Ukranian/American woman at the bottom of this post. She is positively nobel through out the whole story.   



"After I did the Adjustment of Status and Affidavit of Support she changed drastically. She became very cold. For example I hate to ate alone. I would come home from work and she would put the food on the table and go to another room. I told her "I feel more lonely with you than I was feeling before" "To eat alone, to sit alone and not go anywhere"  "Strange behavior all the time"







"And they didn't even bother to take separate flights. They were sitting side by side on the same flight. So at the airport I was waiting for my wife..... with flowers.... coming from Baku.....  I noticed she was very tanned. I thought "There must be allot of sunshine in Azerbaijan" "In my wildest dreams I would not think she spent one month with her lover in Russia (going to Russian resorts)."







"After 8 or 9 months of marriage she filed the abuse claim. I am sure her lawyer advised her she needed more evidence to support her abuse petition. So she sued her poor husband. First in criminal court. Then in civil court and the litigation was on going for years (2) and it was extremely damaging to him"





"My father was more depressed than I ever seen anyone. He was almost to the point... suicidal thoughts. I didn't think he would actually commit suicide but he actually had suicidal thoughts. He was at my house and me and my brother would try and cheer him up. We had absolutely no idea what to tell him. We told him that it was temporary and he was going to move on but it didn't seem to help. He was a complete mess"





Zoya, the wife of the boyfriend:

"he came after work"
"I asked him about her (seen their e-mails)"
"He said:"

"Yes I know this woman"
"I love her"
"I want to marry with her"
"Your age..."
"is........"
"high"
"She's younger than you"
"I'm so sorry"
"You can give me divorce"

"I said... "OK"   





First ex-wife

"I feel really sorry for Avi and probably if I can help somebody besides Avi ... I decided to help. I feel that it's really unfair and justice has to be brought here"


Maxx
 

[Maxx]

As I expected. Some things go beyond the average person's comprehension.

[Coding Wizard]

Too bad it had to happen - my best wishes, my friend.

[cocco63]

Well, i enjoyed reading that divorce story and i got one  of my own to tell......as i was on a russian bride site, a ukranian girl started to send me emails that she was interested in me.....i saw her picture and she looked simple and beautiful.She wrote to me so well, and also didn t hesitate to give me her cell, when i asked her if she had one. i called her, and she was always so happy and affectionate on the phone, almost too good to be true......i started calling every day and she would go to internet cafe and write almost every day , and send another picture of herself.Her name was Violetta and she was 24.....from Ukraine, studying languages in University......the way she talked to me was so , soft and always the caring and concerned woman.....my God, i said this is not possible.....it was my first encounter with a Ukranian girl......and anyways we started talking everyday and she said after one month that we should meet. Well as you know, she sais she didn't have money to travel and could not do it without my help.....so i offered to send her money and she was so delighted......So to make a long story short......the day of meeting arrived today, we were supposed to meet in Greece, and her flight left in the early afternoon, i would only be there day after in the morning......I told her i would have a taxi driver i knew pick her up at the airport, and we spoke in the morning before she left, so all was clear, and i asked her to keep her cell phone open so i could send her text messages, she said ok.....she would.....she was sweet , she told me she was dreaming of meeting me, and that she wanted to make love to me.....she could not wait anymore....she told me many occasions she loved me....and i just could not believe what i would hear from her.....so as the hours passed, i sent her some text messages, and i had no response......i had called the taxi driver finally that had to pick her up, and he told me her flight arrived at 4,30 pm , and he waited till 6pm, and had her paged in the airport , but without response......so he left......i called the hotel, and she never checked in by 7pm, now i m starting to freak out, and here i am, i luckily did not leave, to spend another 5000$ to meet who......no one.....i called her, no more answer on her cell, and nowhere to be reached.....yes, i ve been had..........sucker ! So this is my story and heartbroken, because i really thought she was true !

[Maxx]

I remember Elena Garrett of www.russian-detective.com writing that what happened to you Cocco63, the classic "visa/ticket scam", was a merciful education. The worst she said was the "marriage fraud scam" followed by false DV charges. She's dealt with guys including me on both of these scams. One side is hurt but learned some lessons. The other side nearly destroyed. I talked to one guy last night whose 2 year anniversary of the dark day was this week. He said he doesn't mind being alone and wants to keep it that way for a while... a good while.



Maxx

[ScottJaySplendid]

You should be wary of any woman  you have never met who falls in love with you over the Internet, through correspondence and over the telephone -- UNLESS it is 1795 and you are writing to Jane Austen (in which case there is no Internet or telephone; just weekly letters exchanged through Britain's postal system).

You set yourself up to be scammed.  FSUW don't easily fall in love.  Beyond that, why would you want to be in an involved relationship with a woman you didn't know who fell in love with you? 

Don't worry.  It's a rhetorical question, and I know you got burned, and feel for you.  (Although I am sure in the background there was this belief that even if it didn't work out there would be a lot of steamy sex.) 

Have you figured it out?  You were too needy, not sufficiently introspective, and ready to buy a pig in a poke.  Desperation leads to fraud.

As with everything in the world, if it's too good to be true it ain't true.  Good things require hard work and take time.  The chances of winning the lottery are very small.  The chances of winning the mail order bride lottery without a lot of hard work are nil.

[cocco63]

First of all, i m not desperate, i just wanted to have a companion to go on vacation with, hoping she was looking for what i was, but never in desperation my friend, maybe at your gae, but not at mine...so thanks for the opinion, but i suggest playing psychologist with someone else, not with me.