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Author Topic: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?  (Read 4055 times)

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Offline Manny

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How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« on: August 08, 2019, 12:09:17 PM »
I read an interesting comment from Andrewfi on another topic and I think it may be a discussion starter.

Quote from: andrewfi
Give me a shout when you manage to do, and live, as I have and done for 20 odd years. You see, the first part of being attractive is understanding oneself and what one can offer to each woman you seek to enter into any kind of relationship. That means looking at oneself through the eyes of those to whom one wishes to be attractive.

Thinking of FSU dating, blokes usually tend to want to bat above their station either in terms of looks, age or both. But the days of economics being the only factor are diminishing as these countries become more affluent. Men seeking economic leverage always flooded into the poorest parts of the region, usually Ukraine, to find women. Comparatively few dated in larger Russian towns and cities, and even fewer in EU satellite states. But a big lump of Ukraine has now broken away and others in what remains have access to EU travel easier than before, so are more likely to meet people travelling.

So if you want to bag a hottie 10-20 years younger than you, you need some positive attributes that aren't just financial. So assuming you dont look like a greek god, dont have a triangular rippling torso and dont speak the language of your target, what remains?

As Andrew suggests, look at yourself through the eyes of the woman. What do you think she may find appealing?

I wonder if Andrew may like to expand on this interesting subject?

Steveboy, are blokes still sending women photos of their cars and boats? I know you published that hopeless old bloke recently sending photos of himself with plates of food.  :ROFL:

Does anyone else fancy touching the topic?

Online andrewfi

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #1 on: August 08, 2019, 12:32:09 PM »
Manny, I am no dating guru, but as you know, I have done stuff, and still do, that most guys would like to do, but can't.

I have talked before about an exchange of value, that is, you give your partner/girlfriend/wife/mistress what she needs and she gives you what you need. When that stops, so does the relationship.

So, a bloke needs to know what he can give and he needs to understand what the woman wants or needs.

If you can give a woman what she needs, she will love you forever. I think most guys never figure out what their 'targets' need. They might end up giving it by accident, or the woman settles for what she can get. But the trick is to understand what you have, that you can give to a particular woman - and give it.

And then keep giving it.

Most women will give a lot for a bloke who gives them what they need. And what a woman needs is almost never good looks. Looks matter when we are young, when we are students, when there is nothing else on the table. Any man who criticises a man for his looks in relation to his attractiveness is, in my experience, one who is, himself, rather unattractive in the 'real' stuff.

What does matter is grooming, decent clothing, good shoes, signs that one cares about oneself. A slob is always a slob, just as a slovenly woman is always a slovenly woman.
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Online Steveboy

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #2 on: August 08, 2019, 01:52:19 PM »
I know a fair bit about this subject unfortunately I don't have time to go into it in detail, most men have no idea when it comes to chatting up a good women, I see it every day.. its not just your looks its your communication skills when it comes to conversation..

If I was a women signed up to any FSU women dating site I would be left within a day.. most men cannot even start a conversation with these women it will be so boring the women is going to fall to sleep reading it.. it usually consists of ...nothing other than boring idol chat about absolutely nothing!

Women  "Hello how are you"

Man "Im ok thanks "

Or

Women "Hello "

Man "Hello"   


And that is it.. nothing interesting and very easy to see why so many men get no where!

And that is just one of the problems.. Uploading some bloody awful photos is another looking like you have been sleeping in some garbage bin all night..

Never understand why so many men upload photos of them selves looking like a bloody tramp..Clean yourself up! Have shave, brush your hair for christ sake..

I would just put it down to boring personalities for many guys .. and that is the truth of the matter I couldn't even imagine a hot women living with such boring people..

Personality always counts I think.. If you have a good personality you win all the way .. and of course take some care over yourself..


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Offline Mr strange

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #3 on: August 08, 2019, 01:53:20 PM »
It depends on what the girl wants.

Me I look young for my age of 44. I am musical and play guitar, drums and sing. My natural curly hair is still intact.

I don't smoke, do drugs, drink alcohol and are natural slim. Never have a trouble with that.

Then I treat people nice, honest and romantic (with the right girl), friendly and loyal + 100% dedicated for the one.

Good manners cost nothing said Lemmy from Motorhead.

So far it works and I will leave it at that



Online andrewfi

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #4 on: August 08, 2019, 02:31:20 PM »
I look old for my age...
Said no man ever!
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Offline Manny

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #5 on: August 08, 2019, 02:40:34 PM »
So, a bloke needs to know what he can give and he needs to understand what the woman wants or needs.

If you can give a woman what she needs, she will love you forever. I think most guys never figure out what their 'targets' need. They might end up giving it by accident, or the woman settles for what she can get. But the trick is to understand what you have, that you can give to a particular woman - and give it.

And then keep giving it.

So, this being the case, how does Joe Sixpack identify what Sexy Olga needs?

Online andrewfi

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #6 on: August 08, 2019, 02:49:09 PM »

So, this being the case, how does Joe Sixpack identify what Sexy Olga needs?

I have found that communication is a big help. With two ears and one mouth, using the two in proportion seems to work well enough.

Twice as much listening as talking is the way.
...everything ends always well; if it’s still bad, then it’s not the end!

Offline dcguyusa

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #7 on: August 08, 2019, 04:02:32 PM »
Quote
And that is it.. nothing interesting and very easy to see why so many men get no where!

The days of the troubadour are long gone.   :biggrin:
An uninformed opponent is a dangerous opponent.

"Y'all be makin shit up" ~ Markeith Loyd

Online MBS01

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #8 on: August 08, 2019, 04:07:12 PM »
Other general thoughts:
Think ahead about your future as a couple including where you will be living and what you both will be able to do there. 

For example professionals like lawyers or doctors etc. may find qualifications do not transfer well to other locations as well as there is an expectation of a certain level of lifestyle that would be expected with it.  Can you offer that to your future lady?  Thus how well will her skills or training provide an opportunity for her in your country?

Online rosco

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #9 on: August 09, 2019, 02:04:19 AM »
There was and still is chemistry between the wife and I. We both find each other attractive and we tell each other often.

However, as time has passed (8 years now), I’ve noticed that my wife finds it really attractive when I’m pro active in setting up a new business or getting out there and making things happen. She often comments that this quality makes a man stand out more and with it bringing respect and admiration.

A couple of months back I set up a pop up shop, never done it before. There was so much work going on behind the scenes at a time where my other business was jumping and I was doing my pilots exams. It was full on.

A month later, my business was on track, passed all my exams and came home from my 5 day pop up adventure with 17k in cash. The cynic in me says it was the cash that won her over!!  :chuckle:


Online andrewfi

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #10 on: August 09, 2019, 03:52:37 AM »
Rosco, money alone does nothing, money is a tool used to attain objectives.

That insight is what sets people apart.

The wealthy guy who only counts money is not wealthy, he might as well be poor as a church mouse.

I bet that your wife was happy that you wandered in with a pile of loot because she knew that meant nice things for the both of you - whatever that means in your relationship.

When one understands that one can also understand that one does not need to be 'rich' to use the money to good effect, in a way that makes one's women happy and happy to be with you.

Money does not make one attractive, it is what one does with the money that does the trick.

...everything ends always well; if it’s still bad, then it’s not the end!

Online msmoby

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #11 on: August 09, 2019, 04:17:39 AM »
Rosco, money alone does nothing, money is a tool used to attain objectives.

That insight is what sets people apart.

The wealthy guy who only counts money is not wealthy, he might as well be poor as a church mouse.

I bet that your wife was happy that you wandered in with a pile of loot because she knew that meant nice things for the both of you - whatever that means in your relationship.

When one understands that one can also understand that one does not need to be 'rich' to use the money to good effect, in a way that makes one's women happy and happy to be with you.

Money does not make one attractive, it is what one does with the money that does the trick.

..and how have all these theories been working out for andrewfi ?..


Online rosco

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #12 on: August 09, 2019, 08:58:01 AM »
I agree.

In part I was of course jesting but the fact that I worked so hard, stayed away from home, took a risk and came back with the reward, made it all the more appealing for both of us. She was proud, happy to see the family plan working out and she finds it admirable and attractive when a man can get off his arse to provide. A bit cave man but true.

For me the financial boost was important but also the love and respect from your family is reward alone. Had I been a bit of a con man or a lazy bum, I'm sure my wife wouldn't have the same attraction.

I guess this is a quality I'm referring to other than money and looks.

Online MBS01

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #13 on: August 09, 2019, 09:37:52 AM »
More thoughts:
Up topic it was stated that men tend to go to poorer locations to find attractive poorer families and their daughters as potential wives.  Yet even in such countries some lady's homes and lifestyles match very well or even above those of their foreign peers.  Still they too want for a different life for themselves just like other ladies do. 

For example my wife's family home would fit in very well in any western major city with 2 or more million residents, except that such homes have walled in yards for protection where we tend to build fences for privacy more than protection in the west.

Professionally she has also found that music teachers of the 3 top Conservatories of the FSU like herself are in great demand by families seeking this level of teacher for their sons and daughters in the west.  Early on one of her students obtained a Gold Medal the highest provincial award for his grade given by the RCM programme in Canada in the province with the largest population in the country. 

Thus Music is a skill that transfers well between the FSU and other countries. 
NB: 2 cousins preform professionally one as a senior member of the internationally renown "Moscow Soloists" and another with similar talents.  Other family members are also well known in the arts and entertainment community in Russia, etc. 

Again think about your future together and where will your wife be if you should not be there one day.  Will you have provided for your family's future and made it possible for her to survive your loss some day?  This will happen to us all one day as no one lives forever.  You could outlive your wife, but as is noted most men marry younger women who tend to live longer.  We know of 2 other couples locally where the wives are now widows.  One family immigrated to Canada many years ago and the second one did as we did he was from the USA and Canada and she from Russia.  Just a point for all to consider regardless of where you and your wife are from.

Offline Confederate

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #14 on: August 09, 2019, 10:18:04 AM »
There was and still is chemistry between the wife and I. We both find each other attractive and we tell each other often.

However, as time has passed (8 years now), I’ve noticed that my wife finds it really attractive when I’m pro active in setting up a new business or getting out there and making things happen. She often comments that this quality makes a man stand out more and with it bringing respect and admiration.

A couple of months back I set up a pop up shop, never done it before. There was so much work going on behind the scenes at a time where my other business was jumping and I was doing my pilots exams. It was full on.

A month later, my business was on track, passed all my exams and came home from my 5 day pop up adventure with 17k in cash. The cynic in me says it was the cash that won her over!!  :chuckle:

What is a pop up shop? What were you selling?
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Online andrewfi

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #15 on: August 09, 2019, 01:55:42 PM »
Chasing after poor folks always seemed to me to be a bad idea. Poverty is only a relative thing, very few of us will ever meet people in real poverty.

MBS01 is right about this. The people you want to meet and make life partners are unlikely to be from the dregs of society - if they are then things will likely go bad.

Oh, moby, on the whole things go pretty damn fine.
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Online msmoby

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #16 on: August 09, 2019, 03:20:55 PM »


Oh, moby, on the whole things go pretty damn fine.

'Sure', M Serially Single, "I can still do, what most guys would like to do, but can't.".

What with your bad back and your blessing of avoirdupois..and'honest' character .. You'll be a proper catch ..

Offline Manny

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #17 on: August 09, 2019, 03:24:56 PM »


Oh, moby, on the whole things go pretty damn fine.

'Sure', M Serially Single, "I can still do, what most guys would like to do, but can't.".

What with your bad back and your blessing of avoirdupois..and'honest' character .. You'll be a proper catch ..

Yet he is the bloke who takes on holiday, not suncream, but two or three women. Go figure.

Online Guile

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #18 on: August 09, 2019, 03:27:59 PM »
moby's track record of getting dumped by women isn't so good  :ROFL: :ROFL: 

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #19 on: August 09, 2019, 03:53:24 PM »

Yet he is the bloke who takes on holiday, not suncream, but two or three women. Go figure.

Very admirable to 'defend' the athletic, handsome mr andrewfi, but ..

1/  I'm not the type that impresses .. i'm the monogomous, boring, sort of chap...
  like you, of course..


2/ and if they are as good looking as photos we've seen of his previous 'conquests'  - is that something to 'boast about ' on his behalf ....?  :sick0012:

( normally, I wouldn't be so direct .. but he 'raised the bar'  - and YOU permitted it .. )








Online andrewfi

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #20 on: August 09, 2019, 04:28:28 PM »
What's suncream?

The women I know about.
...everything ends always well; if it’s still bad, then it’s not the end!

Online Steveboy

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I support no government anywhere, ever, never. No institution, No religion!!

Online andrewfi

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #22 on: August 09, 2019, 08:03:57 PM »
One can be single and not alone. Not celibate. Although, of course, many are.
...everything ends always well; if it’s still bad, then it’s not the end!

Online msmoby

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #23 on: August 10, 2019, 12:27:39 AM »
moby's track record of getting dumped by women isn't so good  :ROFL: :ROFL:

Having Police knock on the door suggesting one has defrauded folk is defo not attractive to most women..

Her having her shared bank card declined at the supermarket checkout... Not attractive..

Not giving up, proving you were wronged..getting back on your feet and some.. Attractive

Thank you for your raising some  circumstances...









Online NS1

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Re: How Attractive or Why are YOU to Women?
« Reply #24 on: August 11, 2019, 06:49:35 AM »
Any bum can keep a girl for a few months maybe even a few years.
A few here are proof of that.

Most women don't find the same thing we as men find attractive.
The ability to provide is always a factor. Common goals and hobbies help.
The ability to communicate is key.
Love is great, but trust, compatibility in many aspects is equally important.
I agree keeping one's self looking presentable is always good.
Confidence will open any door and many women find it very attractive.
Having some looks help. Sexually compatibility is very important.

You have to have skills :)
There is nothing permanent except change.