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Author Topic: A Visit From St. Bubba - An RUA Christmas Fairy Tale  (Read 236 times)

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Offline B.B.

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A Visit From St. Bubba - An RUA Christmas Fairy Tale
« on: December 24, 2017, 02:11:18 PM »
Keeping with tradition, I repost "A Visit From St. Bubba - An RUA Christmas Fairy Tale"
(Also slightly revised and extended, keeping with tradition - Happy Christmas to all!)

A Visit From St. Bubba

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through RUA, 
Not a creature was stirring, not even a Markje
The thigh-highs were hung by the chimney with care, 
In hopes that Снегу́рочка soon would be there; 

Maxx was chilling in Georgia, and making new plans,
While gag threads are posted by Lord of the Dance,
AvHdB pondered a new Christmas yacht,
And Confederate sleuthed out Muslim terrorist plots,

The n00bs were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of popkas danced in their heads; 
Andrew and Manny shared a nightcap, 
And Shakey, and Herrie and Leslie played craps,


Then from the corner arose such a clatter
Everyone stopped to see what was the matter
It was B/B, that jolly old chap,
Jolted awake from a long winter's nap

He snorted and blinked twice, eyes open wide
And a limo screeched to a halt just outside
Two black suited men burst through the door
A red carpet, between them, rolled out on the floor

I thought maybe I'd had too many martinis,
But the next thing I saw was 8 girls in bikinis!
Each with long, slender legs, and a tiny flat belly
That most certainly did NOT shake like a bowlful of jelly!

And down the red carpet they came
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!
"Now Sasha, now Dasha, now Galina and Vika,
now Yana, Sofia, Marina and Nika!"

B/B looked at me and gave me a wink
"It won't be their *stockings* I'll be stuffing, I think"
They grabbed him and carried him outside of the bar
and dropped him into the hot tub in the back seat of the car

And as the tires squealed and he drove out of sight,
I heard him exclaim, on that cold winter's night
"Whether 'write many or few or just one' (which I think is insane)
The best thing you can do is to get on a plane!"
Saving the World, One Clue at a Time
If your religion insults my intelligence, don't be surprised when my intelligence insults your religion.

Online Confederate

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Re: A Visit From St. Bubba - An RUA Christmas Fairy Tale
« Reply #1 on: December 24, 2017, 02:43:07 PM »
"Now Sasha, now Dasha, now Galina and Vika,
now Yana, Sofia, Marina and Nika!"

Don’t forget Lina or Oksana!  ;D (to your right)


Offline Ste

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Re: A Visit From St. Bubba - An RUA Christmas Fairy Tale
« Reply #2 on: December 24, 2017, 03:05:11 PM »
When I was a kid we used to sing;

Jingle Bells, Batman Smells
Robin Ran Away
The Batmobile Has Lost It's Wheel
And All On Christmas Day...

O pointy birds, o pointy pointy, Anoint my head, anointy-nointy.


Online Lord of the Dance

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Re: A Visit From St. Bubba - An RUA Christmas Fairy Tale
« Reply #3 on: December 26, 2017, 09:43:03 AM »
I'm touched to have been included in your RUA Christmas rhyme B.B., thanks for thinking of me. Hope you and yours had a wonderful Christmas yesterday and best wishes for an awesome 2018. ~ Doug
"I've been abused, I've been confused and I've kissed Margaret Thatcher's shoes." ~ The Godfathers (from 'Birth, School, Work, Death')

Offline Maxx

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Re: A Visit From St. Bubba - An RUA Christmas Fairy Tale
« Reply #4 on: December 26, 2017, 10:02:08 AM »
Cool poem B/B! Thanks for mentioning me.

If I don't post this now, I'll have to wait another year.