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Author Topic: Tale of an Abusive Marriage  (Read 15559 times)

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Offline Donhollio

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Re: Tale of an Abusive Marriage
« Reply #150 on: December 20, 2017, 12:15:50 AM »
Hey Scamp, I first read your story a month or so ago, and the heartache of you situation is depressing. It's unfortunate Singapore don't have the same laws as Canada where a child can't be taken across borders unless proof that the other parent knows. 
 I'll give my two pence. Your income is something that you
talk about often. Big money and a broken heart.  If I was in your situation I would go to all lengths to get my daughter back. Instead you put your job #1, and child down the list after building up some reserves in a low tax workplace.
 Not sure how you sleep knowing she is with a damaged mother, I couldn't. The kid will grow up not remembering you unfortunately, and undoubtedly the ex will destroy and good you did.
  You should get an A-Team together and have them extradite your daughter from Russia. Love her, educate her and have her stay functional in the Russian language.
 As long as you put work and money first,  I don't see this situation getting civil anytime. Just my opinion on the matter.

Offline Scampo

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Re: Tale of an Abusive Marriage
« Reply #151 on: December 20, 2017, 02:14:31 AM »
Hey Scamp, I first read your story a month or so ago, and the heartache of you situation is depressing. It's unfortunate Singapore don't have the same laws as Canada where a child can't be taken across borders unless proof that the other parent knows. 
 I'll give my two pence. Your income is something that you
talk about often. Big money and a broken heart.  If I was in your situation I would go to all lengths to get my daughter back. Instead you put your job #1, and child down the list after building up some reserves in a low tax workplace.
 Not sure how you sleep knowing she is with a damaged mother, I couldn't. The kid will grow up not remembering you unfortunately, and undoubtedly the ex will destroy and good you did.
  You should get an A-Team together and have them extradite your daughter from Russia. Love her, educate her and have her stay functional in the Russian language.
 As long as you put work and money first,  I don't see this situation getting civil anytime. Just my opinion on the matter.

I've considered it and even had quotes from child recovery agencies.  It's about 100k to 150k EUR.  I don't have the money right now.

This isn't greed right here.  As of today, I am a person of net negative wealth.  The ex cleaned out accounts, and moreover, I spent 100k Singapore Dollars on legal bills partly on credit - debts I am still paying off.  I have no property, no assets, no significant retirement savings aside from a private pension pot in the UK.  I need to get myself stable and cash positive before I even think of anything else.  Financial stability is the bedrock of life, and Singapore is not a jurisdiction that is kind to debtors - they can lose their visa, or even go to jail for late payment of tax bills and the like.

Luckily, I am in a good position to remediate my stability, and a few months from now I'll be back in the black and in a position to seriously consider recovery of my daughter - but ultimately, if I'm not financially stable, I can help nobody at any stage.

Online Confederate

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Re: Tale of an Abusive Marriage
« Reply #152 on: December 20, 2017, 12:40:12 PM »
Scampo, today is the 1st day of the rest of your life.

You made some tough choices yet when looking at big picture the right ones. Get yourself financially and emotionally stable first.

Reevaluate if you wish when you’re there. Best wishes.
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. P. J. O'Rourke


Offline Wiz

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Re: Tale of an Abusive Marriage
« Reply #153 on: December 20, 2017, 01:42:39 PM »
Scampo

There is a saying in Greece: "Outside the dancing floor everybody knows many songs But when you are dancing.......you must know the right tune!"

Take note of certain comments made by "Gipsy", they are important!

Take your time, do not get depressed and do not over analyse your past.  All of us make mistakes that after we regret ..... recharge your batteries (finances) and by then you will be more wise.

Play the field but do not commit yourself, for at least a year however attractive or exciting any new woman can it be. Well after that period.... things will look very different. Been there... got the T-shirt.

Wish you good luck.

 tiphat

Offline Kcknll_15

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Re: Tale of an Abusive Marriage
« Reply #154 on: March 06, 2019, 11:47:38 PM »
That's really heart-taking story. I can image the situation you went through. There is no way to get out of doubting. Hope you will be doing well now. Good luck.


 

 

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