Where was this girl trying to go?

[Muzh_1]

Hi Pitt guy and welcome.

You state she asked for clothing and the store is associated with people buying kids clothes.

Is it a kids clothes store, like "The Children's Place" or "Osh Kosh" or a department store?

Maybe she has a daughter and wants to see your reaction?

So far I don't see her as a scammer, or a man-eater, or a red-flag waver.

Also, I'm as curious as you are where this is heading.

This is the first I've heard of an Ukrainian cougar. 

[TomT]

Avoidance of the webcam is troubling. Hopefully, Andrew will resolve that issue in the nearest future, certainly before he plans a visit.

[andrewpttsbrgh]

Avoidance of the webcam is troubling. Hopefully, Andrew will resolve that issue in the nearest future, certainly before he plans a visit.

Thank you guys.  I'm starting to learn to pick up on some things but not all things.  And Muz_1, I am very curious.  This is definitely not the first time I've encountered what I'd consider somewhat close to this, but with local girls.  I played it safe and didn't hang around long enough to let it go bad.  Maybe I was right.  Maybe I was wrong.  I don't know.

I'm not toally sure yet if it's webcame avoidance.  She's brought it up a couple times.  Hopefully I'll figure it out in the next couple days by saying give me a solid time.  So far, I can tell a lot of this on both ends is being done with
smart phones and iPads.

As for the clothes, let me clarify a little bit.  When I said kids, I was referring to my co-workers with teenage aged kids.  I know that store targets to teens to mid twenties demographic.

[ashbyclarke]

I'm not toally sure yet if it's webcame avoidance.  She's brought it up a couple times.  Hopefully I'll figure it out in the next couple days by saying give me a solid time.  So far, I can tell a lot of this on both ends is being done with
smart phones and iPads.

If she's got an iPhone or an iPad she's no excuse to avoid webcam, in my experience anyone with an iPhone isn't your standard run of the mill girl, but there's exceptions and with older versions of the phone becoming cheaper it's less of a worry I suppose.

If she's hinted or mentioned webcam and you've not firmed up time and date then, you've not been assertive!!! these women like a man who's assertive, pussy footing about doesn't gain any respect.

Not wanting to be a villain here, but Kherson, iPhone/iPad, requesting gifts, requesting to meet (no voice talk), it's a got bad vibe to it. If you do end up meeting her make sure you have some serious backup plans, Kherson isn't the best of places if you're on your own, especially if it's your first time to Ukraine.

[Turboguy]

Man down...I'm a Pittsburgh boy.  We have our own language...we're yinzer nation!

Heck yes,  When you get her here after she redds up the place yinz can go to the Burg and maybe catch a Stiller game or maybe just go down the the crick and have a pop and a sammich.  Of course you can make a day trip down to the Yock or just go dahntahn and walk around the Strip. 

Another Pittsburgher or close to it.

[Turboguy]

Kherson isn't the best of places if you're on your own, especially if it's your first time to Ukraine.

Not many places over there are very good if you are on your own.  At least if he needs a plan B there is a half decent agency there. 

I only had one lady asking for gifts in advance.   That continued while I was there and I have to say that she cared more about what she could get than building a relationship.  That would concern me a bit.  Hopefully you can work out a phone call or skype.   I would be a little concerned about her sincerity if it were me.

[andrewpttsbrgh]

Man down...I'm a Pittsburgh boy.  We have our own language...we're yinzer nation!

Heck yes,  When you get her here after she redds up the place yinz can go to the Burg and maybe catch a Stiller game or maybe just go down the the crick and have a pop and a sammich.  Of course you can make a day trip down to the Yock or just go dahntahn and walk around the Strip. 

Another Pittsburgher or close to it.

Yes yes...I understand everything you've just said.  However, you won’t catch any hint of accent or a single word of regional diction coming out of my mouth.  Pop…no no, I only say soda.  Pittsburgh sports, I don’t care.  I’d rather go out on all the awesome bike trails around here then sit on my butt yelling “we won” watching football like I was somehow apart of it.  I am a Pittsburgh boy, but I don’t fall into any of the stereotypes.  I didn’t run to Pitt so I could drink and hope for sweet 16.  I didn’t run to Duquesne and spend an outrageous amount of money to be around all the hot snobby girls.  I went to Point Park.  The affordable school that caters to those tiny ballerina girls and the ballerina guys that had no interest in being competition.  If there’s one thing I can say about myself, I’ve never been one to follow a crowd.  I’m happy to make my own decisions and go down the roads I want to go down…even if it’s not the conventional path.  I don’t try to be different like everybody else.  I try to live my life the way I want it with the values my parents raised me to have.  I’m a different breed of Pittsburgh boy and that’s totally fine by me.

[andrewpttsbrgh]

Kherson isn't the best of places if you're on your own, especially if it's your first time to Ukraine.

Not many places over there are very good if you are on your own.  At least if he needs a plan B there is a half decent agency there. 

I only had one lady asking for gifts in advance.   That continued while I was there and I have to say that she cared more about what she could get than building a relationship.  That would concern me a bit.  Hopefully you can work out a phone call or skype.   I would be a little concerned about her sincerity if it were me.

I am try to work everything out to see if I'm wasting my time.  But please understand, I am taking this seriously.  By that I mean before I even started this thread I was working on back up plans.  The pros/cons and financial implications of pulling back to Odessa or Kiev where I could still spin it into a really exciting adventure.  I'm not someone that wants to sit on a beach.  So still touring eastern Europe is the kind of thing that would be a lot of fun for me and is probably something I would have done regardless.  My uncle has done it several times and loved it.  The history and the culture, all of it really is interesting in to me.  I've checked out the train and bus options to get back.  The cost of flying from Odessa back to Pittsburgh when originally has planned on it being Kiev.  I even was looking at the Visa requirements should plan B present the opportunity to check out parts of Russia.  I already know Russia requires more than a passport like Ukraine.  I really don't have any belief that this is something where you just hop on a plane, meet some girl and suddenly everything is wonderful like a room full of puppies and kittens happily playing together.  I am trying to be realistic.

[Turboguy]

  If there’s one thing I can say about myself, I’ve never been one to follow a crowd.  I’m happy to make my own decisions and go down the roads I want to go down…even if it’s not the conventional path. 

That sounds like a good way to be.  I think I have been much the same myself.  It is not always easy but there are a lot of plusses.

If that trip doesn't work out for you Russia might be a good option.  It does require a visa but that is not a big deal.  I don't think it would work for a last minute plan B.  If you do try Russia stay away from Moscow and St Petersburg except as a tourist.   Look in places like Omsk, Barnaul and other places in Siberia.  My wife is from Barnaul by the way.

I would also suggest if you need a plan B to think about places like the Stans or Moldova.  Stay away from Odessa and there are better places than Kiev. 

It sounds to me like you have a good start on getting a handle on what it takes to succeed.  Read all you can here.  It is far easier and cheaper to learn from the mistakes of others than to have to learn from your own.

It can be quite an adventure and when you find the right woman it is worth everything you have to go through and even more.

[Mikeav8r]

Man down...I'm a Pittsburgh boy.  We have our own language...we're yinzer nation!

Heck yes,  When you get her here after she redds up the place yinz can go to the Burg and maybe catch a Stiller game or maybe just go down the the crick and have a pop and a sammich.  Of course you can make a day trip down to the Yock or just go dahntahn and walk around the Strip. 

Another Pittsburgher or close to it.

Huh? 

[Fussy]

Maybe asking for a gift is a way to test if you are serious. Asking for an expensive and pijntless gift (eg. money, jewelry) would be a professional scammer.

Is it worth a bet of under $100? Your call.

[andrewpttsbrgh]

Maybe asking for a gift is a way to test if you are serious. Asking for an expensive and pijntless gift (eg. money, jewelry) would be a professional scammer.

Is it worth a bet of under $100? Your call.

You do make a valid point and I understand cultural norms are different.  So maybe that isn't the best thing for me to be looking at right now.  However, I sent her an e-mail lets meet up for a video chat at this certain time.  If that time doesn't work, tell me exactley what time does.  That seems really simple.  If she does want to talk and get to me she'll make it happen.  If her interest is not getting to know me...she'll deflect it.

[Turboguy]

It is going to be interesting to see if she does skype with you.   It is a plus that you met her on Elena's.  The one scammer that asked me for presents in advance was also from Elena's so it isn't foolproof but had you said A web or the like I would have been more concerned.  Just because she is the first girl you have really connected with doesn't mean it is the last.  Every so often one comes along that we really feel a bond with and like there could be a future.  If this one does go belly up there will be others and one will turn out to be the right one.   You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders and are someone that would be a great catch for the right woman.  Sometimes it just takes time.  Took me next to forever but persistence pays off.

[andrewpttsbrgh]

You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders and are someone that would be a great catch for the right woman.  Sometimes it just takes time.  Took me next to forever but persistence pays off.

Thank you very much.  That’s a huge compliment.  The man I respect most in the world is the one that taught how to be a gentleman, husband and family man and that is my grandfather.  He didn’t do it by words, he did it by example.  I thank him for it.  He played a large role in me being the man I am today.

[Paul]

How did the phone conversation go?

[andrewpttsbrgh]

How did the phone conversation go?

So far, sadly...excuses why it didn't happen...

[TomT]

What were the excuses?

[Larry]

How did the phone conversation go?

So far, sadly...excuses why it didn't happen...

I'd love to hear the excuses.  I keep a list of excuses why FSUW won't go on skype.  It's a fairly long list.  It's likely I've heard the ones she gave you, but one never knows.  I've said before that if excuse-making were an Olympic event the Ukrainian women's team would take the gold medal in five out of every six Olympics.

[andrewpttsbrgh]

What were the excuses?

Pretty much I'm not home at the moment.  But to be honest, I didn't see her response until I got home which was close to 1:30 in the morning her time.  And she did e-mail and ask me when I was free.

[mhr7]

How did the phone conversation go?

So far, sadly...excuses why it didn't happen...

I'd love to hear the excuses.  I keep a list of excuses why FSUW won't go on skype.  It's a fairly long list.  It's likely I've heard the ones she gave you, but one never knows.  I've said before that if excuse-making were an Olympic event the Ukrainian women's team would take the gold medal in five out of every six Olympics.

Six out of six.

[CC3]

Andrew, go meet her, but set the trip up as an adventure that could stand alone as an interesting and enlightening cultural experience if the romance should prove lacking. To facilitate that, and since local travel is easier for her as a native speaker, arrange to meet her in an interesting city that can be fun without chasing women and going to overpriced 'date' restaurants. Odesa, Kiev, or even L'viv, if she will travel that far, are all historically and culturally interesting...L'viv the most so. If you go in the summer, Odesa will be crowded; better to go there in September or October.

You can book, for daily rental, a one bedroom apartment, all of which usually have sleeper sofas in living rooms with privacy doors, so it won't look like you are prematurely trying to get her into bed. Check out dobovo.com to become familiar with the Ukrainian apartment rental market. Even with no romance, she will be invaluable as an interpreter and guide, if she knows the town. Parenthetically, most rental apartments usually come with free broadband wi-fi. Airline routing-wise, Odesa, L'viv, and Kiev are all served, nonstop, out of Germany by Lufthansa.

[andrewpttsbrgh]

This is my final posting on this topic.  But here's how it ended.  I didn't buy her clothes.  This time, she came to me with a bleeding heart story and asked me to buy her a car..need I say anymore?  My instincts were correct.  This is done.  Thank you to all that helped me.

Drew

[AvHdB]

. . . she came to me with a bleeding heart story and asked me to buy her a car. . .

Drew, We will assume that she preferred a Bentley to a Jaguar. The reality is though there are good women all around the world and there seems to be a hot spot for them in what was the Soviet Union, so we hope you will stick around and maybe tells us more about your adventures. Otherwise the owner of this site will have to find some other way to justify the name Russian Ukraine Adventures. Av

[Boris]

This is my final posting on this topic.  But here's how it ended.  I didn't buy her clothes.  This time, she came to me with a bleeding heart story and asked me to buy her a car..need I say anymore?  My instincts were correct.  This is done.  Thank you to all that helped me.

Drew

Most of us have gone through something similar. It's all part of the syllabus...

[mhr7]

This is my final posting on this topic.  But here's how it ended.  I didn't buy her clothes.  This time, she came to me with a bleeding heart story and asked me to buy her a car..need I say anymore?  My instincts were correct.  This is done.  Thank you to all that helped me.

Drew

Sorry to hear this. I hope it doesn't stop you from your search. There are some great women here.