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Author Topic: Freaked out with a long way to go.  (Read 16256 times)

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Offline Ste

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #15 on: October 04, 2011, 02:56:31 PM »
I smell a troll or a nut job....
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Online andrewfi

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #16 on: October 04, 2011, 03:00:12 PM »
I smell a troll or a nut job....

Maybe, but if he is not a troll then he is well disturbed and if he is like this then how is his missus?
"For what else is the life of man but a kind of play in which men in various costumes perform until the director motions them offstage?" -Erasmus

Offline Paul

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #17 on: October 04, 2011, 03:01:22 PM »
I smell a troll or a nut job....

+1! Something is up.


Offline Vinnvinny

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #18 on: October 04, 2011, 03:05:06 PM »
I smell a troll or a nut job....

+1! Something is up.

Clearly it isn't! ;)

Offline Rasputin

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #19 on: October 04, 2011, 03:05:24 PM »
Divorce her.

If you're unhappy with your sex life after seven weeks of marriage, what will it be like after seven years?

there is a man who wrote a long article about his misadventures regarding marrying 2 russian girls.

basically he said they are loveless, unaffectionate, lay there like a dead horse during sex, and prefer their own company to their husband.

If he keeps marrying the same kind of women and getting the same kind of results, methinks the problem lies with the fellow in question  :biggrin:
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Offline Paul

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #20 on: October 04, 2011, 03:13:59 PM »
I smell a troll or a nut job....

+1! Something is up.

Clearly it isn't! ;)

LMAO  :chuckle: You're a quick one, Vinny  :chuckle:

Offline TomT

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #21 on: October 04, 2011, 03:57:58 PM »
there is a man who wrote a long article about his misadventures regarding marrying 2 russian girls.

basically he said they are loveless, unaffectionate, lay there like a dead horse during sex, and prefer their own company to their husband.
he wrote that they do not like to sleep in the same bed at night with their husband.
he wrote that, russian children are not hugged and loved and nurtured much, and they grow up being distant, unaffectionate, and dont care to change.
he pointed out that if you are a person who wants an affectionate wife, ..one who you want to be around you a lot,....in the sense that you and she are "one" and enjoy the same room, the same dinner table, the same everything, then the last thing you want to do is marry a Russian/Ukrainian girl, because they dont understand simple affection, they dont even like it.
They operate on a sort of sex is love mentality, and they dont understand the basics of romance, nor do they intend to discover it.
They operate in a black and white mentality, and are not able to function in a marriage with a man who demands that they view him as the main thing and not just a part of their program.

Some Russian women fit the stereotype described above but they are certainly a minority. This may have nothing to do with your wife, however. You should find out what she wants, even if it takes a third-party to do so.

1) Going forward, stop reading this sort of shit to her; it's counterproductive.

2) Stop freaking out; that's a girl's job. Women (Russian women also) expect man to have some control.
"Get away from the keyboard little man. I know where you live." (Message left in my facebook mailbox by our resident psychopath.)

Offline TomT

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #22 on: October 04, 2011, 04:03:15 PM »
Im an american she is :......
I met online 5 years ago, a girl who is a Ukranian/Russian/Jew who lived in The Crimea.
We fell in love online, and had what i thought was a very good relationship.
We took it slow, we stayed online for probably thousands of hours.
I thought we were a perfect fit, then i left the USA, and flew to Israel where she lives with her parents.
She is 33 and im a decade older.
We both are musicians, both are smart, both are easy going, friendly.
And i cant stand her.
And i think the feeling is mutual.
We have been married for about 7 weeks, and OMG, its been a war from the start.

There is a lot missing between having met online five years ago and having been married for about seven weeks. Would you please flesh it in a bit?
"Get away from the keyboard little man. I know where you live." (Message left in my facebook mailbox by our resident psychopath.)

Offline B.B.

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Offline Slumba

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #24 on: October 04, 2011, 05:59:07 PM »
Apparently Israelis can be as nutty as Italians, they just whine a lot more about it!

(I can say this as I have Italian background)...

Anchors Rewoven

Online 2tallbill

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #25 on: October 04, 2011, 06:03:30 PM »
I find it difficult to understand how you didn't cover all this in
your 1000's of hours of conversations covering everything from
frequency, to freaky fetish Fridays, to toe curling on Tuesday,
to sleeping arrangements, and especially conflict resolution
not to mention if she will just lay there while holding her ankles.

(Bill will get teased for saying this but..................)
7 weeks divided by the sum of 20 sexy times +6 sword swallows is something
close to 4 times per week which isn't fantastic but it's not the Sahara Desert
either. She IS putting in an effort more than just a token one.

To me it just seems like you haven't been communicating enough, before, during
or after. I don't know enough to give any advice except to talk, talk and talk.
If you or her don't want to spend the effort then get a divorce. Who knows maybe
your cologne is gagging her and she doesn't want to offend you, or she wants the
lights dimmer because she doesn't like her ____________ (enter body part here)
Maybe you are hurting her, scarring her, or offending her. Surely being compared to
a whore would offend most women I know.

Whatever the problem is can only be discovered by talking. Getting all worked up
will probably cause her to shut down. You need to stay calm (this will help her
remain calm) Don't just say yeah, yeah, yeah you actually need to calm down.
The way that you are writing looks like you are bouncing off the walls. This will not
facilitate conversation.

Calm down. then talk.  Calm down!  Calm down!! then talk. 

Udachi

Bill
FSUW are not for entry level daters. FSUW don't do vague FSUW like a man of action so be a man of action  If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane. There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.
Get an apartment not a hotel. DON'T recycle girls

Offline Paul

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Offline B.B.

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #27 on: October 04, 2011, 07:01:49 PM »
Apparently Israelis can be as nutty as Italians, they just whine a lot more about it!

(I can say this as I have Italian background)...

It would be the same if you had an Israeli one.  :chuckle:

That said, it appears that the OP is having "Jewish Sex Doggie Style" -- he sits up and begs and she rolls over an plays dead.

Ba-dum TISH!

B/B
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Offline mendeleyev

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #28 on: October 04, 2011, 11:13:28 PM »
Quote
Surely being compared to a whore would offend most women I know.

SW,
Bill's point is vital if you will ever be successful with a lady. One thing for certain is that you can't treat a wife like a music groupie/whore.

There is only one person that matters in the "what someone thinks" category-and it is your wife. You need to adopt actions and a code of respect if you wish to have a wife and not just a convenient whore/music groupie.

So I'd suggest this be the last time you pull back the sheets on your sex life. A MAN never breaks the bond of sexual intimacy by blabbering to his friends, much less posting about it on a public Internet forum. No matter how frustrated you are, she deserves better. That is something a MAN and his wife works out in private or with a professional counselor.


Offline Still_Water

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Re: Freaked out with a long way to go.
« Reply #29 on: October 05, 2011, 02:20:57 AM »
Divorce her.

If you're unhappy with your sex life after seven weeks of marriage, what will it be like after seven years?

For those of you who are following this thread, i decided to just give you a day by day account, as per 10-05-2011

let me reiterate how the problems began.

first,...when she and i were online for 5 years, beginning in August 2006, i noticed that even after we were 2 or even 4 years into the relationship, she seemed to not be able to express her tender feelings.
It was easy for her to receive mine, but, i noticed that her ability to even say, "i love you" online, was mainly in response to me saying it.
In other words, i would tell her, and then she would tell me back, the same.
Few, maybe less then 10 times since ive known this girl, had she told me "i love you" online, without being prompted.
I did ask her about this, and her response was that she didnt want an online love, and felt no reason to be affectionate, as what she wanted was a "in real life" relationship, and she very much assured me that i would find her in life to be very loving and affectionate.
We talked about this online, as i noticed her "distance" and her inabilty to emote or to let me feel her feelings.
Sometimes we would have a disagreement online, and once the happened, she was unable to say "i love you" back to me when we got off line.
But she assured me that all my concerns about her being distant, cold, detatached, aloof, and uninterested would change once i was "in real".
And for the first week i was with her, even till the 2nd week, she was very friendly, but never very "touchy', or wanting to be near me.

Do you understand?

Listen reader, most couples have a lot of touching going on when the relationship is NEW.
Understand?
And what is more, its usually the girl that is all over the guy.
Rubbing his arm, trying to hold his hand, playing with his hair.
Basic 101 new couple in love......romantic feelings.
I noticed from the first handshake she gave me at the airport when we first met, that she didnt seem to feel comfortable with a simple hug.
I mean c'mon, a girl that does not like to hug?
What is that?

So, about the 3nd week after i was in Israel living in her room, i got this idea in my head that it was not right that she would sleep in the same bed with her last boyfriend of 2 years whom she lived with, ........but with me, her husband, who flew 5,000 miles to be with her, ...she wanted to not sleep in the same bed with me, or even be in the same room with me that much.
So, i flatly told her that apparently the love she felt for her last boyfriend that caused her to sleep with him and to have a very constant sex life must be based on love she felt for him that she didnt feel for me, coz here i am, we are married, and she is not being intimate with me but about once a week, and she didnt want to sleep with me much.
She had told me that her sex life with the previous was very much daily, or even more.
But here i was, with one a week sex, and i was spending a LOT of time during the sex play giving her all kinds of pleasure.
I didnt just hop on and hop off.
The first 3 weeks i would spend 30 mins just touching her and kissing her and holding her, and THEN i would give her a lot of oral pleasure and THEN i would do the rest.
So, she was getting a 1,000 sex act from me the first 15 times, but i got tired of this, because, the 15 times she would want to be intimate with me was turning into about once a week.
And i realized that i did all the kissing, all the holding, all the effort.
I worked hard to please this girl, and she just sort of became a sponge.
So, i started thinking, WTF.
Here she was, having daily sex or 2 or 3 times a day sex with the last BF, and here i was killing myself, taking so much time with her to try to please my wife, and then i realized that i was like some worker bee taking care of the queen who just lay there.
So, as i said, i told her that apparently there was more love for the last BF then for me, based on a whole lot of things she wasn't doing for me that she did for him, including frequent sex.
U can imagine the war that came after i started talking to her about this.
I could see the guilt, the condemnation, and i could tell that the way she was angry was based on the TRUTH i was giving her.
So, following these arguments, which lasted about 3 weeks, we find ourselves estranged, angry, mean spirited, and often cruel.
But the fact is im not going to be #8 on her list of important things.
Im going to be #1 or im going to find my way back to the States.

And this i told her last night.

and about last night.
if u have been reading....
we had an argument about the fact that she came into the room dressed in a sexy nightgown id never seen and so, i asked her if she wanted to be with me.
I asked her this because 2 days earlier we were fighting about "signals" and "body language", and she told me to just tell her what i wanted so that she would know.
So, last night i told her after considering that the nightgown she was wearing was a "here i am".
Well, she didnt answer me, which led to a discussion about why she didnt answer me after telling me to ask, and after wearing that " :censored:  me" night gown".
So she left the room, and i was actually glad.
I started writing this thread.
Well, 2 more times after that, she came back into the room, and told me not to argue.
So, i did anyway.
I told her it was unfair to wear something sexy in front of me, when i had not been allowed to touch her but once in 13 days.
So she left again, and then one more time but she came back.
After the last time, i decided to just go to her, pin her to the bed, and see how she reacted.
When i came to her, i told her what i was going to do.
On her face was a look of anger and a look of curiosity.
So, i layed her on her back, and sat on her., gently.
In about 3 mins i had her mounted and she was seeming to react normally.
But then, about 15 mins into the intimacy, (i tend to take a while, im not a 2 min type of lover), ..i noticed she was looking at the CLOCK.
Say what?
Look, im not a man who is inexperienced with women.
Ive had a few girlfriends in my time, but ive never been with a hooker, even tho i made a comment about one in another post.
So, here i am, deep into this girl for about 15 mins, and she seems to be enjoying all im doing, the variety, and then she looks at the clock.
A few mins later, she looks at the clock again.
So, you tell me, does  your girl look at the clock when you are having sex with her?
What is THAT?
That tells me that she is just doing her DUTY, and is not really into what we are doing at all.
Ive felt this now for the last dozen times we have made love.
I can tell she likes it ok, but she is not really into it.
Do u understand?
And i try everything.
Positions, tempo changes, ..everything that a good lover knows to do, and i sware she could yawn., which of course is what looking at the clock really is.........its a yawn.

Maybe the issue is cock size.
Could be.
Im average.
And her last BF, was really tall, and kinda big, and perhaps this included his libido.
Perhaps she became use to a really big penis, and mine, while a bit larger then average, is not by any means like a horse.
So, maybe that is what the problem is...
Unfortunately this is not something i can ask her, coz what girl with a brain would tell you......."yes, i need a bigger cock then yours".

so, to continue.
About 25 mins after we started the intercourse, i stopped, then i pulled her to the edge of the bed and gave her some intense oral sex for about 20 mins.
Most women would have had an orgasm the first 5 mins, and at least one ore by the 20th min, coz im experienced at this technique, but this girl goes 20 mins, then tells me she is sorry and knows that i have to be tired, and makes me stopx.
She then slides next to me, and begins touching me sexually, then starts to give me a BJ, and then mounts me and gets me off a 2nd time.


so, isnt this crazy?

here is a girl that gave me intimacy only once in 13 days, and then last night she is angry at me, and leaves the room, and then before its all over, i get sex and a BJ and then more sex.

So, i need some help here.
Im lost in the weeds.
I cant find the sun.
I find that when we get along, we dont have intimacy, but when we fight, and i sort of force her into the sex position, i end up getting off 2x.

I have asked her about something.
In the USA, most girls are use to a lot of touching and kissing and foreplay...
That is what im use to.
A lot of build up., a lot of warm up toward the big event.

But last night, when i just sort of pushed her to the bed, pulled off her panties, and didnt even give her a kiss....

Maybe this is what she is use to.
Maybe this it "typical Russian sex", where the male just comes to the girl with his need, and takes her without a whole lot of affection.
Just, get her on the bed, get the panties off, and push it in.
Maybe that is what is wrong.
Maybe i have been trying to be the Michaelangelo of sex, the Casanova of foreplay, and what this girl is use to, what Russian girls find to be NORMAL SEX, is just..........Ok, you have an erection, put it in me,, and dont worry about the kissing.

does anybody here know?
coz i am so tired of this issue with this girl.
Am i doing wrong by trying to love her with sex, instead of just being an animal and mounting her like shes a dog?
Is that what is wrong?
I just need to be a dog as this is what she is use to?
Is this the "Russian idea" of sex?
Push her to the bed, never mind if she is even wet, and just have what i want, get off, go to the kitchen and eat a piece of cake?


somebody be honest here, and tell me about Russian girls and what they are use to, coz i am giving this girl Casanova Lovemaking, and she is not even noticing.




 

 

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