Dating & Marriage With Women From Russia, Ukraine, Belarus & FSU > Dating Scams and Suspicious Agencies
The Value of Names, E-Mail Addresses and Photos
ScottJaySplendid:
In trying to determine if a correspondent is a scammer (do not assume the correspondent is a woman), what is the value of "her" name, e-mail address or photo?
E-MAIL ADDRESSES
All of these are fungible. The value of the second -- an e-mail address -- lies in whether it has been used before. If it has been, by a known scammer, then that is who you are writing to.
NAMES
As for names, it's not as easy. A lot of women in the FSU, a group of countries with a population approaching that of the US, share similar names. And there are variations when transliterating those names from Russian or Ukrainian, or another native language, to English.
In Russian, for example, everything is spelled "WYSIWYG" -- i.e.,phonetically. That's not the case in the English language. (Indeed, the "spelling bee" is an almost unique American and British institution. Every other language rather consistently spells its words. The French, of course, consistently spell and pronounce their words, but do so inscrutably.)
Since lots of women may share the same name, a person who is a scammer may use a name that a legitimate woman will also use. So, if you get a Google hit on a name, that's only preliminary. Addresses coupled with names are better, but remember the problem of "identity fraud" in the west.
PHOTOS
Photos are often stolen. There are a few poor FSUW whose photos are being passed off by scammers as them. So it's possible that a woman, whose photo has been identified as that of a known scammer, is actually real.
But as soon as a photo (or suite of photos) is used enough, it will be discarded and a new photo or suite of photos will take its place.
CONCLUSION
None of these tools is very useful in determining if your correspondent is a scammer, since as soon as a scammer is identified, he moves on to his next identity. Thus, the sites that feature thousands of photos, e-mail addresses and names are pretty unmanageable. The names are pretty much a worthless resource. The photos generally impossible to get through in a coherent fashion. The e-mail addresses, though, may be searchable in Google. (See my post on Google as your best friend in this section.)
What is best is to understand what you are doing and what your correspondence is supposed to be doing -- getting to know each other. If your correspondent wants to meet you before you get to know "her" (from telephone calls, exchanges of candid photos, and lots of well-translated letters), or expresses an emotional attachment to you before a face-to-face meeting, the odds are you are writing to a scammer. If it's too "good" to be true, it's not true. On the other hand, who would want to join up with a woman (on a permanent basis), who is so casual about serious things?
If the letters from your correspondent appear to be monologues that "she" is having with "herself," then you've probably gotten a scammer. This may not be true for a letter to two, since many women will have "canned" introductory letters, too, but pretty soon you can tell if "her day," "her friend," "her family," "her job," "her musings," etc. are just him talking about his imaginary Internet persona.
In the end understanding what you are doing, what your correspondent is doing, and using Google is the best way to proceed.
kyivtrip:
Hi everybody,
I've had e-mail correspondence with about 200 women in Ukraine and Russia for a little over two years. I am no expert, but I have observed a few things.
Most of the women I have determined to be "legitimate" seem to use their real name in their e-mail address. My correspondence with women who have made up names - like "gentledream" or "sexybabe" or "flower4u" have all deteriorated as it became more and more apparent that the letters from them were form letters and often failed to respond to direct questions.
The "legitimate" women I have written - and I have met a couple of dozen on my trips - respond diligently to my thoughts.
Even an e-mail address in English might be suspect. It is an e-mail address designed to be used with foreign men.
My time in Ukraine with real women has led me to believe that the average woman there would not "invent" a name for herself unless she has some compelling reason to. Even if it is just an amateurish attempt at anonymity.
The "real" women I have met never heard of yahoo or gmail. Their addresses are from Russian mail sites. mail.ru; rambler.ru, etc
Almost all women who write to you first have an agenda.
My MO (and by no means my recommendation - it is just my method and mileage may vary)
Don't put all your eggs in one basket. I use a mix of agencies and Internet sites. In 2005 it took me about 6 weeks to compile a list of 30 potential "to visits". I did this in the Spring and went to Kiev in September. By September I had weeded the group down to 6. 3 wanted to get married.
I did the same thing in 2006 and "clicked" with the 3rd woman I met. She was from Nikolayev and traveled 9 hours to come meet me in Yalta. I went back in December and spent 3 weeks with her and we got engaged. A tragic end, though - on February 1 she had a debilitating stroke and has still not recovered, fully.
As to pictures - they can be old or ... Send flowers and get fresh pictures.
Best $50 you will ever spend if you are starting to get serious.
I ask for contact info right away. Scammers will not give you a telephone number, as a rule. I call women who can't speak English all the time ... and I can't speak Russian !!! But ... we can hear each other's voice and verify that each other exist. The phone call is, usually, the subject of their next e-mail. Comforting, yes ?
David
Chris:
--- Quote from: Kievtrip ---Most of the women I have determined to be "legitimate" seem to use their real name in their e-mail address. My correspondence with women who have made up names - like "gentledream" or "sexybabe" or "flower4u" have all deteriorated as it became more and more apparent that the letters from them were form letters and often failed to respond to direct questions.
The "legitimate" women I have written - and I have met a couple of dozen on my trips - respond diligently to my thoughts.
--- End quote ---
I agree with most of that, although like most things it is not something you can set in stone. But most women who I know are legit do use at least part of their whole name.
--- Quote ---The "real" women I have met never heard of yahoo or gmail. Their addresses are from Russian mail sites. mail.ru; rambler.ru, etc
--- End quote ---
Sorry I don't agree I have met plenty good quality women from the FSU who have Yahoo/Hotmail etc accounts. Some because they have visited Western Countries, but not all of them.
--- Quote ---Almost all women who write to you first have an agenda.
--- End quote ---
I strongly dissagree, I have communicated, spoken to and even met lots of good ladies who have written to me first. None of them were scammers. It depends on what sites you use and what you put in your profile and how you go about advertising yourself to them in general.
--- Quote ---My MO (and by no means my recommendation - it is just my method and mileage may vary)
Don't put all your eggs in one basket. I use a mix of agencies and Internet sites.
--- End quote ---
Good advice.
--- Quote ---I did the same thing in 2006 and "clicked" with the 3rd woman I met. She was from Nikolayev and traveled 9 hours to come meet me in Yalta. I went back in December and spent 3 weeks with her and we got engaged. A tragic end, though - on February 1 she had a debilitating stroke and has still not recovered, fully.
--- End quote ---
I am very sorry to hear about this Kievtrip.
--- Quote ---As to pictures - they can be old or ... Send flowers and get fresh pictures.
Best $50 you will ever spend if you are starting to get serious.
--- End quote ---
Can depend on when the flowers are delivered, it is not foolproof as a lot of women don't always look their best first thing in the morning. Photos can be very misleading, good and bad.
--- Quote ---I ask for contact info right away. Scammers will not give you a telephone number, as a rule. I call women who can't speak English all the time ... and I can't speak Russian !!! But ... we can hear each other's voice and verify that each other exist. The phone call is, usually, the subject of their next e-mail. Comforting, yes ?
--- End quote ---
Great advice, something I always do after the 2nd or 3rd email if I like them. Never met a scammer yet who would give you a phone number. As you say, even if you cannot communicate it is amazing how sometimes you can spend an hour on the phone to someone when she doesn't speak any English. ;)
TomT:
I have spoken to a number of scammers on the telephone. In the past, telephone communication has been their Achilles’ heel but many have corrected this shortcoming.
LoyalMan:
--- Quote from: Kievtrip on May 21, 2007, 09:49:28 PM ---Hi everybody,
I've had e-mail correspondence with about 200 women in Ukraine and Russia for a little over two years. I am no expert, but I have observed a few things.
Most of the women I have determined to be "legitimate" seem to use their real name in their e-mail address. My correspondence with women who have made up names - like "gentledream" or "sexybabe" or "flower4u" have all deteriorated as it became more and more apparent that the letters from them were form letters and often failed to respond to direct questions.
The "legitimate" women I have written - and I have met a couple of dozen on my trips - respond diligently to my thoughts.
Even an e-mail address in English might be suspect. It is an e-mail address designed to be used with foreign men.
My time in Ukraine with real women has led me to believe that the average woman there would not "invent" a name for herself unless she has some compelling reason to. Even if it is just an amateurish attempt at anonymity.
The "real" women I have met never heard of yahoo or gmail. Their addresses are from Russian mail sites. mail.ru; rambler.ru, etc
Almost all women who write to you first have an agenda.
My MO (and by no means my recommendation - it is just my method and mileage may vary)
Don't put all your eggs in one basket. I use a mix of agencies and Internet sites. In 2005 it took me about 6 weeks to compile a list of 30 potential "to visits". I did this in the Spring and went to Kiev in September. By September I had weeded the group down to 6. 3 wanted to get married.
I did the same thing in 2006 and "clicked" with the 3rd woman I met. She was from Nikolayev and traveled 9 hours to come meet me in Yalta. I went back in December and spent 3 weeks with her and we got engaged. A tragic end, though - on February 1 she had a debilitating stroke and has still not recovered, fully.
As to pictures - they can be old or ... Send flowers and get fresh pictures.
Best $50 you will ever spend if you are starting to get serious.
I ask for contact info right away. Scammers will not give you a telephone number, as a rule. I call women who can't speak English all the time ... and I can't speak Russian !!! But ... we can hear each other's voice and verify that each other exist. The phone call is, usually, the subject of their next e-mail. Comforting, yes ?
David
--- End quote ---
You are an expert!!!
Your stat is the same as mine: only 1/10 of women is sincere! :o
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